I met a girl in Chicago and stayed awhile. This was back when people went South Side to listen to blues and didn't shoot each other nearly as much (and didn't turn their autos to the side when shooting - it hadn't been in the movies yet. (no - I won't post that one because I'm sending it to a poetry mag by midnight tomorrow PST) How about this one then HUMPING By Carl (aka JPDONLEAVY) © 2004, 2013, 2017 04xxxx I used to hump them up against the wall of a stairwell down from the library where I typed L/C catalogue cards on an IBM Selectric they were expensive then but I have owned two since; they were mostly slim and tall, small- breasted and sterterous-breathed, moistly- receptive and musky with longing I remember all their first and last names the six or seven from the library that Fall, one an ex-airline stewardess, faithful but none too bright, another lately arrived from Poland though not from Gdansk a ballet dancer she could have crushed me like a python and did essay a few thigh squeezes just to intimate her steely cabled limbs the shorter ones were breastier as though God had ordained that they should be compensated for never seeing the fateful throw at the ball game when the crowd rears up cheering wildly it was so easy to come in those days, they with knee insinuated twixt my thighs, my fingers sliding up the lissome stockinged limbs and past the garters to slip cunning fingers into “the place where they would be” (as Lady Franklin so sweetly put it on her monument to Sir John and his gallant band—of their 1846 Arctic demise) There was a New Zealand girl lately ex-London and mad for it, a New Zealand girl who systematically worked through we lowly clerks one by one in her minuscule apartment she stood not upon the order of her coming giving it up at the first thrust, her baby ass vibrating like an exerciser belt she married a dentist some years later and we corresponded for a time, but the sweeter couplings lay beyond the stacks that separated us from the cataloguers, those with BL esses, the quality women…………. Maggie: laughing and lively this was much more serious and left a deep well of grieving when she moved on but then a freckled redhead – ex Air Force corporal renewed my life when at the office Christmas party she melted in my arms and made me whole for the balance of winter, she is dead now, Michael for whom I had worked told me she was crushed by an 18-wheeler back in the 70s up to the Lakehead, she had always liked compact cars. -30- June 14, 2004, Kingston, Ontario
Life is strange sometimes.....and maybe that is your one and only, and you will meet up with her again someday......and then be together forever.....Maybe that is written in the stars for you.....Life certainly has a way of going its own way sometimes no matter what we do.
I've though about looking her up on here... I'm foreign to social media sort of but maybe I'll make a page ha ha... sounds desperate huh? Lol make up a Insta-twitter-book to see where she's at... I don't even know what state she's living in... maybe it was just meant to be what it was and that's all... never know though I guess... only woman I ever cried over ha ha... oh well
How did you find this place? This is the only social media place I visit......I found it here by putting in metaphysics forums in the search engine..... and you never even found out what state she was going to? I loved someone once, and wanted to fall madly in love with him, as he seemed to be with me....but my mom told me if I went to him, I could forget about her and my brother and the family. i took her seriously, as she always meant what she said...., and I was too chicken at the time to disobey. Lose my brother? She did not like him...but my dad told me I should have married him...Oh, well, is right.....I am over it now, though....he was an artist like me.....and pretty well known in the SF field. i started out with him being his model for book covers,.... no nothing ever nude...I can hear the questions.... and I am not going to blame my mom so much , either...as if he really wanted this....nothing would have stopped him for fighting for it and giving up so easily and blaming me for not standing by my man...when I was...instead of going to war with my mom at the time.
I don't know moonie...someone who is willing to sacrifice their love for you...I can't stand that shit. What kind of real love is that? Maybe your mom was right and concerned for you though. My ex-girlfriend kind of made me confused about what love is. She was very frigid, but at the same time we got along so well, two peas in a pod. But eventually I was like, I want some romance in my life...and left to find that kind of love. And now I'm like, "What is romance?" Shit doesn't seem to exist except in fairytales and for people who can afford to buy candlelit dinners and diamond rings. So did I ditch the love of my life just so I could go out and bang random chicks? I'm sorry, but as nice as banging random chicks would be, having someone I related to like I related to her was even better. Now it all seems shallow and fake to me on some level, though I'm making a concerted effort to forget. I hope that kind of love isn't once in a lifetime. I screwed myself pretty hard.
I edited and added in a sentence there which you may have not seen......yes, i realize....and I made the right decision........but confusing as hell at the time and painful.......My mom did not like Stan, either, or anyone I ever knew....she did not like anyone....lol...and it seemed to me she only liked my brother that she did not even like me ever.......but he walked through hell and back over and over to win me......yes, he warred with her but he also helped her more than anyone else I ever knew......so that is why i married him...... i fought with her the last day I saw her about it.....too,.,..and then the next day she died....and I did not know she was going to die the next day....but I made decisions all along not just for myself.
Talk about jealousy....I was moving into an attic apartment at the time...up 3 flights of narrow , winding stairs to get to my apt. Stan was helping me move....so there is my treadmill that weighed a ton and was put together already....I said to Stan,. let me get my boss to help you with that. Stan burned with jealous rage and carried the damn thing all the way up the stairs by himself just to show me.... I think he shot out one of his knees around that time, which is why he cannot jog with me, anymore.......
Honestly I just looked up hippie/spiritual sites and eventually stumbled across this lol... sounds bland huh? I'm not one to type in statuses about my day or how great things are or pictures of my truck ha ha I know that's not what social media is all about, I'm just being an old man about lol... sorry that was all judgmental about social media I feel like here there are interesting conversations to actually be made... if I want to talk to my buddies or family I'll pick up a phone... maybe I'm old school in terms of that and should catch up to the times, I don't know... my mom always told me I was an old soul And she was living in Colorado when she moved but that was 8 years ago... she may still be there but I don't know... unfortunately I was so torn over it that I tried to push her out of my mind completely and eventually it helped but yeah, lingering questions when I have a moment to think... which is now since I just moved and don't have anyone close nearby really...
I was meaning your mom, saying she'd cut you off if you went with him. But maybe she just did know better. I don't know what I'd do if I was a parent either. One of the last things I'd ever allow is for a kid of mine to get used and thrown away by somebody. If she didn't like him maybe she had good reason, or maybe she was just overprotective. At the same time I find it hard to believe that she would have seriously cut you off if you had gone. But maybe she knew exactly what to say to get you not to. I think our ancestors are in a better place. I think they understand things better and forgive us, watch over us. I'm only really recently starting to think this might be the case, though, and man have I done some embarrassing things when I've thought I was alone.
I met my wife at the end of her first term in college. Being older than her, I'd already been there for two years. We started dating steadily and, six months later, I asked her to marry me. We were engaged for two years before we finally married. We'll be celebrating our 38th anniversary one week from today!
When you know, you know... I try not to see any of my experiences in life as regrets but I really wish I did something more to make sure my relationship with Holly worked out (it was 8 years ago now that she moved and that was the only reason it ended)... I didn't own property, I'm sure I could've found work if I followed her... we were together about the same length of time as you and your wife were when you got engaged to her (6 months maybe) but before or after I haven't had that type of real connection with any other woman... I thought to myself that I could marry her many times while in the relationship... hence why I've ended a number of relationships since without anything being really wrong with them... other than i just didn't feel what I felt with her ... congratulations on 38 years... that's special and feels more rare as time goes on
OMG honey you know what you need to do. Make your next 38 years with your lost love. That is too frickin' sweet.
Where is this lady now Jude? If she isn't married I say reach out to her if you still think about her in this way.
I'm going to see her for the first time in forever on Friday... a friend of mine was still in touch with her via social media... we were going to meet in October for this thing right around my birthday but she mentioned she would be just a few hours away this week... she is actually coming to my house (I just moved in a month or so ago)... she's curious to check it out and naturally I'm nervous as shit because of it ha ha... ...okay I'm babbling as usual...
I was totally feeling your energy like you would be responding. I'm going to send you a PM if you don't mind. You aren't babbling Jude. I just don't want to say/ask anything too personal regarding this matter on the public forums. Can I message you?
