lies lies and more lies

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by garfbag, Jun 17, 2006.

  1. garfbag

    garfbag Member

    how do you like being lied to? not just once... twice... but all day... not by mistake... not by circumstances... but by choice... how do you like being lied to? not just today... but everyday... not just a day... but all year long... how do you like to uncover the truth, pieces by piece, layers by layers... see more lies... go around it... found some truth... then only to know there is more lies around that... how do you like it when you were told that what you were told is the truth... then two minutes and a question later... you realize it was also a lie... how do you like when the answer to the same question changes by time from 10 am to 5 pm... hourly... well... i know... i was told it was not intentional... okay... sure... ooh... wait... here comes another one... let see if i can catch this lie... it's like... when the shot counts is getting high... my save % may go down... but no... this time... i caught all of them... oh wait... nooo... nooo... i may think i got all of them... but all this window dressing... framing with pretty words... great prefect over story... may've fooled me... as i said... what happened today could be made to a movie... a good chick flick i guess... here is a good one for you... the following line suppose to be the same:
    a. no, it's not
    b. i don't know
    c. i might have
    d. probably
    e. i will
    f. yes

    i don't... they are suppose the same thing... and this too:
    a. no, we are not
    b. no, i don't know
    c. no, i don't know yet
    d. maybe
    e. i was going to tell you
    f. i guess you already know
    g. it's been going on since the beginning of the week

    so yeah... i was on phone with a friend... i don't know if he wants his name to be posted... but... he was talking about al gore... how he lost the election because he wants to appeal to everyone... he is not real... and at the end... it just all lies... and lost...
     
  2. garfbag

    garfbag Member

    i call her again today... and found outmore.... she was lieing to me again....


    this is the story.... we have this arrangement after we broke up... we will tell each other first if anything happen... like seeing other peoeple... actully she is the one who put that up... and want me to follow it... now found out that she has to doing this with the other guy (our friend, close friend) for 2 months....

    I couldn't believe it... you enforced that to protect herself... and left me unprotected... she keep me in her reach all this time.. and now i get burn..

    I keep asking her about this... and she keep saying no... now the truth came out.. wait.. I thought the truth came out last night when she said it's been a week.. it's actully been 2 months...

    my best friend is out of the country yesterday (when she told me about this..., actully I asked....again and again)..... she have my group of friends.... I have no where to go for this 3 months... I am completely isolated by her...
     
  3. garfbag

    garfbag Member

    today... i discover more truth... not because i was told the truth.. it is what i learn from the lies... yes... i got lied to again... this is all lends to a well planned and well execution plot... well, maybe not so well executed because i did discover i guess... i started to hate the word "agreement" now... because it means nothing to some people... the funny thing is that it was their agreement that i was following...

    why do people lie? i don't know... but i know it's much harder to lie then telling the truth... i mean you will have to keep up with the lies you made... and you have to remember what you lied about in order to cover it... it's just too much work... but i guess.. it's not too hard for some people... maybe i am just lazy to even lie.... and just blindly trust everyone...

    there are few techniques i learned from this lesson of life... that is... if someone found out that you lied to them... you just have to simply say... you miss understand what i said... but in order to do this... whatever lie to tell has to be really deep... multi-meaning... and long like an essay... otherwise... there is nothing much to not understand.. so no straight forward answer like yes and no... always answer within the grey area...

    why do people apologize? i don' t know... when they truly fell sorry about what they did... when they really think what they did is wrong... when they know what they did will not happen again?... but from what i see right now... that is not the case...someone apologize about a previous lie... then right after they say sorry... you ask them a question... they lie to you again... within the same matter... within the same topic... within the same conversation... then repeat that for multple times... and then it contiues on the next day...

    friends... friendship... i am not talking about close friends here... but at the same time i am not talking about one of those who just met... i am talking about years and years of friendship... can this happens to friends? i guess... because it did... there is this roger commerce on tv... about a group of friends going to germany to see the world cup... and at the end it said... "the best place in the world is where your friends are"... hehe i guess i am in the shit hole now... well... not that i don't have any left... it's just... this incident completely shielded me from them... at least for the summer...

    how should one deal with this? i don't know... i don't think it is possible... this is beyond what we can imagine... in these days... in this civilization... in this age...
     
  4. Brand New Soul

    Brand New Soul Senior Member

    Im a little confused... So you went out with this lady and you broke up? And shes lying to you. Dude you got to move on, you can;t controll her lies and what she does and she has no right to controll you either.
     
  5. garfbag

    garfbag Member

    okay... it is like this... she dumps me... then tell me that we should let each other know when we start seeing other people.... she kept me within her range for all this time... make me thinks that she still likes me... and yet.. wouldn't let me go away from her to get over her.... and now.... I found out that.... she is seeing a friend of both of us..... and she thinks i will be okay with it... and i will be okay for her not to follow the arangement we have..... and then in fact.. that it's been going on for months!!!! during all this time... all the friends in this group ask her about them.... she always say no... i ask her regularly... she keep saying no.... now... this two days... i discover most of the truth from her... and I feel like I am used.... because she kept me with in her distance... and then she found someone else.... then she just kick me away...

    she said she didn't tell me because she didnt think it would happen... because they are friends... and she doesn't wnat things to get bad.... and now she changed her mind becasue they are getting along well.... that is completely BS.... I mean... so ... she will date people that doesn't get along with her if they are not friends then?1?!??! I mean.. one will only date with people who gets along... so what she said jsut doesn't make sense...

    there aremore to this story.. justu odnt' have time to write it all out... sorry
     
  6. ihmurria

    ihmurria fini

    aarg, I find it sooo hard to read your writing. I'm sorry, I need capitalization/actual sentences to make true sense of this.


    But, if you aren't dating her and she's lying to you, she isn't worth your time. Sad but true. It's shitty that you invested some time and effort into her, but you know you can do better than someone who lies to you all the time.
     
  7. sniffmagikmarkrs

    sniffmagikmarkrs Senior Member

    i didn't read all of what you wrote but

    lying = dump her
     
  8. Carlfloydfan

    Carlfloydfan Travel lover

    yah..I would NOT stand for lying if I were dating someone..let alone from an ex trying to maintain a friendship. Sounds like she is a controlling manipulative bitch and you need to get her out of your life as soon as possible. Get rid of everything that remind you of her. that is a start.

    where are you from?
     
  9. Bellfire01

    Bellfire01 I'll say anything

    This little situation is called the ole comfy cushion. She can partially move on with her life and when things don't work out with the new him she comes back to the old you. Where you went wrong, breaking up means just that and not keeping someone around as a comfort bumper. She's going to lie to you because you'd move on and she'd have to try and find a real relationship. You were ok with it 'cause you felt some part of her still loved you. Wrong my friend, some part of her still needed to use you. You can do better so let her go mess with that other dude's head and get yourself a real person.
     
  10. I've dealt with compulsive liars before. Break free, trust me, you will see that it will be best in the long run.
     
  11. Brand New Soul

    Brand New Soul Senior Member

    Had a friend who was complusive and mainpuletive (don't think I spelt that right sorry) she constantly lied to me. put me down, get pissed off if I hung out with someone else for a change. And we are no longer friends best thing I have ever done. Im not syaing she was a horrible person or anything but Im free now to do what I want to see who I want and do what I want.

    So dude seriously let her go! Shes obviously not worth the time of day to get a worked up over. She just wants someone to fall back on and your it. So move on with your life, and let it go.
     
  12. garfbag

    garfbag Member

    okay.. sorry i have been busy... here is what's going on after my last post...

    we talked... she told some of our friends about this, I told her, i don't want other people to know... i want to keep this private... i said, don't let anymore people to know about this...especally "him"... since he was still my friend... and we talked more...she offer not seeing him and i said that was impossible since you always told some of our friends... they will all think i break them up... then she said "no no, i can tell them it's my choose, i can just say, i don't want to ruin our friendship..."... so I said... no... that's kind of stupid.... i said it's better for me to get hurt... then two of them to get hurt... she insisted... so on the way home... i think... no.. this is not right... so i call her... and tell her again that no.. this is not right... it's better for one to get hurt then two... and i told her to do what is right... then she said no... your hurting.. i don't want to see you hurt... okay.. so... what did she do????

    she talk to "HIM" within few hours... told him everything... well of course not everything.. not the part that she lied... just the part that i am pissed about he and she... wow...

    I called her the next day to see how things go... i notice she sound diff..... so I asked... she said... she told him that they shouldn't "date" until i am okay with it... until i am over her... wow... please note that her defination of dating... there is really no diff between seeing and dating there... and i said "what? you are going to call me to see if I am okay with it... and if not you just call back the next week?? this is the stupidest idea i ever heard... and yet you TOLD him!?!? he and I can't even be friends anymore... you destoried this circle of friends... how would you think he will feel??? and didn't I ask you not to tell anyone epecailly him!?!??!?!?!" then she said "I didn't realize it..." so i said... if you truly cares about me... you will not not realize that... sigh... well....

    I don't know what she is trying to put there... i was pissed.. so i told couple of our friends what happened... so they know the truth...

    friend said that if she doesn't care, she could've just cut it all together.... but I dont' know... I think she is just doing damage control... since we have a lot of common friends...

    so... we exchanged emails... she sent me a really really cold email... I emailed her saying that if she would say the truth all along... this would not happen... and if it's not one of our friend in the same small circle.. this would not happend... then she said... the truth could be hurtful... so i said.. no.. it's just minimal damage... this is what she said in the email

    "as for keeping distance from him...if i chose to do that, the only reason i would would be because of u, i would have been letting u control my life out of guilt, and like u said before, u don't want to be the reason that keeps us apart cause that would make u feel worse. i do like him and there is potential, that's why i can't keep distance from me and him. this i just told u is very hard to hear, it is the truth again, r u sure u can handle the truth? "
     
  13. garfbag

    garfbag Member

    there are just too too much that will remind of her...

    I am from Ottawa
     
  14. garfbag

    garfbag Member

    wow... that is exactly right!!! great reply!!!
     
  15. garfbag

    garfbag Member

    didn't have the chance... she did it before me... hehe... plus... sigh.. just say this weekend... she got my circle of friend to the cottage... so i was pretty alone for the weekend.. not like I dont' ahve other friends... it's just.. it's a long weekend... people hang out with their closer friend... and she took them away from me...
     
  16. spooner

    spooner is done.

    you... only... need... one... period... per... sentence... o...t...h...e...r...w...i...s...e... the... ellipsis... loses... all... meaning...
     
  17. Gypsy_girl

    Gypsy_girl Member

    Definitely move on. she's not worth your time.
     
  18. wizarddrew77

    wizarddrew77 The Wiz

    LOL LOL So right!
     

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