lack of sex drive, post partum related?

Discussion in 'Parenting' started by Chill~mama, Aug 21, 2005.

  1. Chill~mama

    Chill~mama Member

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    just wondering
    for all those ladies out there with kids
    do you go through a phase of decreased sex drive after your baby is born?
    i just can't get "in the mood" if you know what i mean
    maybe i am just preoccupied with baby thoughts but my man is thinking something is wrong with me
    how can i explain this? i have heard that there is lack of sexual desire after pregnancy but i wanted to be sure that i wasn't just believing in the hype
     
  2. RainbowSquidney

    RainbowSquidney Member

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    I've heard of this too and it's nice to know I'm not the only one!

    My baby is 4 1/2 months old and my husband and I have had sex only TWO times since she was born. I know....TMI!

    Seriously though, I find myself soooo not in the mood. Between leaky breasts and dryness in the more private areas :p it's just not something I'm interested in......at all.
    Plus, all I think about are the kids, what needs to be done around the house, can we pay the bills this month, etc.....
    Not very romantic stuff.
    Or maybe I'm just making excuses. I'm not really sure why I'm not "in the mood".
    Okay.....I'm just rambling now.
    I don't think there is anything wrong with you.
     
  3. mynameiskc

    mynameiskc way to go noogs!

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    nope, nothing wrong. it's totally natural. just figure, you've had a baby, which was the entire point of a sex drive anyway, evolutionarily speaking. the toll on your body is FAR MORE than that on your husband's. not to mention the constant demand to your energy, body, attention. and the fact that my daughter was constantly with me, on me, touching me made me notwant to be touched for a while. i didn't develop much of a sex drive until i was ready to have another child. i suppose the recovery time is different for everyone.
     
  4. Brighid

    Brighid Member

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    Totally normal. The hormones of breastfeeding keep you focused on your baby, which is how it should be. Your estrogen levels are pretty low while nursing, natures way of supressing ovulation and keeping you from getting pregnant again right away.


    It does return, as all those second and third babies being born all the time prove.
     
  5. daisymae

    daisymae Senior Member

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    I was that way too. Way too tired and focused on the baby(s). Try not to forget about your man, though. They sometimes get a bit jealous now that they have to share you..;)
     
  6. FallenFairy

    FallenFairy Senior Member

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    its just your hormones are out of whack and your husband needs to understand that after having a child your mind is racing and thinking about the baby. my son is 5 months old and for the first two months i was so uninterested then for like two months i wanted sex everyday but my fiancee has no sex drive so it just suckked for me and now i have lost all interest in ever have any type of sexual contact with my fiancee. so it takes awhile for your hormones to get back into the same cycle or whatever
     
  7. willow1313

    willow1313 Member

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    I'm going through the same thing right now. My twins will be 1 year old in 6 days. I have had absolutly no sex drive since they were born. I can't explain it, I just know that sex is the furthest thing from my mind. My husband is always asking me if I'm "getting it from my boyfriend." I'm so irritated about the whole situation that I don't know what to do. You are not alone!
     
  8. RyvreWillow

    RyvreWillow Member

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    Haha, i think it lasts about two years for me :p
     
  9. hippychickmommy

    hippychickmommy Sugar and Spice

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    To be honest, after I had my oldest (whom is 5 now), my sex drive seemed to increase. But 3.5 years later after I had my twins (who are 2 now), my libido took a nose dive, and has been luke warm since. I hate that fact, but I hear it's pretty much the norm. I mean, afterall, we mamas have to take on a lot, and in turn it leaves us exhausted, and sleep seems like heaven on earth, and sex, one more thing to do. ;)

    Not that I don't enjoy sex, because I certainly do, it's just my sex drive isn't what it used to be.
     
  10. Chill~mama

    Chill~mama Member

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    thanks ladies for sharing
    i am glad to know i am not alone out there
    are there herbs you can take to increase sexual libido
    damiana leaf i heard works but how much would one want to ingest?
     

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