Kitten's Litter

Ooooh! talk about "wish i wrote that!"...lovely!

rain and rain and rain...also awesome!

 

Memory! loved the introduction of the headache



also, textile skins = badass. good point!

 

it salivated all day,
slobbered all over
the rooftops and sweaters
and downcast heads.
strangers like blind, wet cats

holyyyyyyyyyyy cow wowwwwww <3 <3

 

:drool: You have an amazing talent. No doubt about it. This is sublime.

 

the energy behind this one, oh so incredible strong. you are a pretty self-confidence figur i, suppose to hear in your words. Well anyhow, my compliments you have a inspirational focus!

but why all those ´difficult words´, this is offcouse a subjective opinion but still i feel the urge to say; that you´re using those words to reach a ´higher level´... and besides that it´s simply a pitty because of that i am not able to understand all of it.

 

Kitten, I liked both of your last posts, Shadenfreude and Train of Thought... I looked up Shadenfreude and learned a new word... but it confused me because what I found a definition that didn't seem to fit with the poem. It doesn't change the fact that the poem is great... "the Universe is one fussy toddler" is such a good line. In Train of Thought you used some ways to state the complex but common... the turning inward. I'm glad it was only a train of thought and not practice in your poems! That is what makes your poems special... you do write about what you observe and you look out the window instead of constantly inward and "become the single high authority". Two great poems. I read the post by Magixarts about writing at a higher level. I've thought about that too for my own writing but I was told once by a very knowledgable (and published writer) to write at whatever level you are at. There is such a variety of people in the world that you would never rise above all levels. If you are however writing a piece specifically for an audience you would of course adjust it for that audience (as an author who writes teen mysteries or children's books would)... but most poets write because they are trying to do their best job at providing images and extending a platter heaped with that familiar "food" and finding a way to show it to everyone is some new and provocative way. Keep it up! We are enjoying it! Vetty

 

Pure beauty...i love how you unfold inspiration in everyday activities (like riding a bus)...how even the very mundane things affect you on a different level...

 

*****

 

so swift,
your hand stroke
brushes off the winter whirl
from the hair curl
that danced
upon the fringe
of your buried
neck.

the heat needle
punctures bubble,
grief bursts and blinds,
instantaneously,
simultaneously,
lead packs the lungs
disables my ability to breathe,
the snow lodged inside
the craters in my throat,
makes it hard to speak.

but we walk on.

our footsteps could be traced
by dying wolves,
who hunt and hunger
for the heavy-minded.

my thoughts digress
towards the impossible,
but I would prefer
a well-intended death
of being torn to shreds
by starving animals,
rather than
slowly,
suffocating
in the hallow silence
that lives among the naked trees,
and in you,
walking beside me, cold,
heaving muffled sighs
and confessing,
so unnecessary
it
makes my heart
thrash around the ribcage,
and makes my chin
and jaw
grow
jagged icicles.

 

KittenX,
I'm going to run the risk of sounding like a scratched CD but you are so fucking talented. I would like to critique your work, but I can't. I don't have the talent. The only thing I can do is read and read and hopefully learn something.

I look forward to your postings with the eager anticipation of an addict waiting for the next hit.. And when I do read a new work, I savour it, frequently reading aloud, and pondering your wording for days, even months, trying to extract, to wring it dry of it's very essence, it's youness.

I can only hope that you continue to write and give me(us all) the pleasure of sharing in your world.

Peace,
Aidan.

 

Today, I cry too easily,
as if my eyes were
overripe apricots.

So am I,
ready to burst
at the sound of a word
that provokes,
or rather opens hidden gates
and I am left whirling,
drowning in my own mudslide.

Yesterday, I laughed too easily,
as I jumped in your arms
with reckless abandonment,
we were tightly bound,
just lying there, twisted like licorice,
savoring the proximity,
and letting our hands blindly glide
to confirm that yes, in fact, we are real
and together, truly
so unexpectedly.

I watched you sleep
and wished to stop time,
knowing full well
the futility,
and instead of idealizing
the prospects of yet-to-be memories,
I let go of the clock hand
and simply inhaled
every last bit of your breath.

Exhaling,
"You are my sustenance."

Today, you left
and it was as if
someone turned on the hospital light,
or shook me until I woke up,
freezing, disoriented and
missing a limb or a part of my lung.

Now I am back to the lopsided days,
full of obnoxious noise
from the half-brained herd,
full of self-doubt rising up
like the steam from manholes.
I am like an infant crying,
for the lack of control
for the lack of words,
to verbalize my withdrawal,
and the hunger and pain
that follows close, at the heels
of any sudden surge of
happiness.

 

This seems like a very personal piece. I found it very moving. There always seems to be a lot of poems about love and break-ups, etc. but I still found this original and thought provoking. Your use of similaes/metaphors throughout the piece is excellent. I especially liked "twisted like licorice".

For me, the last stanza is the best. You seem to have a great knack of finishing very powerfully, while still leaving the reader room for personal thoughts and opinions.

Well done.

 

and letting our hands blindly glide
to confirm that yes, in fact, we are real

for the lack of words,
to verbalize my withdrawal,
and the hunger and pain
that follows close, at the heels
of any sudden surge of
happiness.


some people say that im a dreamer, but im not the only one.
beautiful..

 

"revealed" is an awesome poem, some really powerful raw emotion...

 

I've re-read this poem again today after quite a while and I think it is very beautiful. I have got one small criticism. If I had the talent to write it, I would leave out these lines on editing.

The poem stands just as well without them and reads a little better...I think.
Peace,
A.

 

i miss you kitten! post something =[

 

Aw thanks for reading and commenting you guys, and I'm sorry I've been absent, I haven't even written anything since this last piece. Life has been going from hectic/stressful/busy to incredibly dull/uninspiring/I just want to sleep all day. And I feel like I am just lacking words and motivation. Hopefully this will pass soon enough, I need to come back.

redyelruc - maybe you're right and that part is over the top dramatic, I'd like to still keep the idea but maybe cut it down. I'm surprised this line doesn't bother people " full of obnoxious noise from the half-brained herd," it kind of bothers me, but at the same time it's true, so that's why I chose to leave it.

 

i love that line

 

overripe apricots

'nuff said

 

Haha, sorry I don't know what that means..in the final version I actually deleted that and left it as "my eyes are overripe" because I figured overripe apricots is just too weird.