Is This Abuse?

I am 33 now but can't get the image out of my head from when I was 10 of my mother bursting into the bathroom and spanking me naked before I had a shower then dragging me to the naughty corner naked and making me stand there in the nude. Would that be considered child abuse?

 

Ask a professional.

 

If it was abuse than I was definitely abused. Even as what you described happened to me more than once. Back in my young days it was common place for a parent to burn you up with a belt. My dads favorite choice of weapon was a razor strap. I called what he did to me abuse back then as I do now. Legally it was acceptable to do that back then here in the states. Now if reported there would be an investigation by child services. When I was a teenager acting up in town the local cops would haul me straight to dad and snicker about what was going to happen to me when I got home.

 

If you are female it was abuse.

If you are male you are probably already paying someone $300 to spank you before you have a shower

 

Wow what did you do wrong? I guess she was severely pissed at you and no that’s not abuse.

 

It wasn't considered child abuse then, but attitudes towards spanking have changed considerably since then and there is mounting research to support what your own anecdotal evidence suggests, that spanking can leave lasting mental scars.

 

the naked part is weird if other people were there

 

I’ve had a feeling for a long time she somehow got off on seeing me naked. It was only ever me that copped it, my brother and sister got spanked but never kept naked.

 

Why would a 10 year old pay his own mother to spank him naked before a shower? Are you for real?

 

Why was she spanking you? Doesn't sound too bad. I'm not even sure what happened to me.

 

He was making a joke about you as an adult male. The context clues are there if you look for them. If he had said "were" instead of "are" then yes, that would be bizarre.

 

Answering back or backchatting whatever you want to call it. Kept naked in the corner for an hour.

 

did it work?

sometime humiliation works better than corporal punishment

 

Spanking, used in moderation causes a combination of mental and physical punishment. Back when our children were younger, we were told that only corporal punishment that caused any injury or left a red mark for more than an hour could be regarded as abuse. It sounded logical to me.

 

It did yes. I hold no resentment to my mother for it but it’s something I’ve never forgotten and can’t get the image out of my head.

 

The fact that it still haunts you today indicates that you perceive it as abuse.


My advice; see a shrink

 

Do you consider it as abuse?

It doesn’t haunt me as such, just can’t get the image out of my head.

 

This is a very good point.

The fact that you are literally scarred by it to the point of asking strangers on the internet about it (all over a bit of "back chatting") it seems maybe it was a bit extreme. It certainly has had a significant effect on you. I would wager that it would be considered abuse by today's standards.

 

No, I consider it appropriate punishment if the offense was serious enough - what did you do to trigger your mother?