This new girl I’ve been seeing confuses me sexually… As a recently divorced man, my ex wife was the only girl I had been with. We got married young. She was sensitive I guess and was very loud, vocal, you could feel her orgasm very strongly and even squirt often. The new girl I’ve been seeing and I had sex for the first time not long ago and when we got started I noticed she didn’t make a single sound. It was hard for me to stay into it because I’m a pleaser. What she did do however was bite me a lot and dig her claws into my back. She also pinned me down and got on top. She’s always up to do it whenever I initiate it but I’m still thrown off by the lack of vocal responses i get from her and I have felt her wet but not really cum. Now I probably don’t have the experience she’s had with others but I do think there’s mixed signals here or is just everyone different and her getting into it is more biting/clawing than acting like she’s mid exorcism like my ex wife?
You're overthinking it. "What she did do however was bite me a lot and dig her claws into my back. She also pinned me down and got on top. She’s always up to do it whenever I initiate it..." I see no down side to that.
I do tend to overthink and that’s a lot of my downfall when it comes to relationships… I just kind of took her lack of vocal interactions as a sign that maybe she wasn’t into it.
Assuming that you are serious about wanting more than just a sexual relationship with her, I think that you have a lot more to work out than how she jumps up and down in bed. Are you happy with her as someone who you would enjoy spending time with and setting up a home together. You also seem to be comparing her with other people and that will always end in disappointment. You have left the previous model behind.
I do feel strongly about her and I do want a future with her. We’ve only had sex a handful of times now I think maybe 5-6. Most have been multiple times in one night. I’m only comparing the sexual side to my ex because it’s the only thing I can compare it to. My ex being very loud made me think pleasure and the fact this one wasn’t made me think maybe I wasn’t floating her boat. But then again children are in the house so maybe she taught herself to let loose with the biting and clawing stuff.
Isn’t that what these places are for? Ask questions related to the topic of the sub forum? Is there a post limit before you can ask a sexual question towards your relationship under the sex section of the relationship sub forum? Am I missing something?
You're doing just fine. Ask all the questions you want. A lot of us have a lot of sex experience and will pass along what we know. As far as the new girl not making noise that's her way of having sex. It doesn't mean she isn't enjoying it. She just displays her pleasure her way. Nobody fucks the same so don't compare her to anyone else. I've had moaners, vulgar talkers, quiet ones, and many in between. Me, I like to talk to my partner during sex telling her what feels good (or doesn't). There is one thing to know when it comes to sex and pleasure. You are not responsible for making her cum or her pleasure. She is. She, just like you, is the one who is going to cum if she wants to. You can't make her like she can't make you. What you can do is enjoy what you have going for you. Do what you are doing while in and out of the sack. Since you have had sex with her repeatedly you must be doing something right to make her want to do it again and again. So keep on doing what you're doing and don't worry whether she is into it or not. If she wasn't you wouldn't have fucked her this many times already.
Thank you for giving me an actual response instead of looking for some cherry picked reason to criticize me for asking for help. I like your way of thinking. Does give me some relief that maybe everyone is just different and she likely would not have wanted a repeat if she wasn’t into it. I guess my overthinking leads me to think she may have been expecting it to get better but it didn’t. We just spent our first whole weekend together. Things went well.
Good. I hope you discussed sex during your time together. It behooves a couple to talk about their likes and dislikes when it comes to intimacy and not while in the throes of passion. A simple discussion over dinner or during a car ride somewhere is a good time to talk. It's good foreplay too.
My first girlfriend was very sexual but never made a sound. I knew by how vigorously she fucked with me and the fact that she squirted a bit, and I felt she came a lot because of the sensations on my cock and her movements, but she never made a sound. I used to make some noises, especially when coming in her. I read by her vigorous involvement that she was enjoying all we did. If a woman is too loud it is a turnoff for me and it can get embarrassing, but a little vocal interaction is the norm I think. I was newly divorced and staying with a couple and it was not helping my state of mind to hear the wife vocally directing the sex they were having. "Go deeper, harder. UUgghh, that's it. OOOhh I love your cock. Do me from behind. Don't come yet, AAgghh". All this had my frustration level through the roof.
I think rule #1 of relationships with women, be they friends or sexual partners, is to acknowledge and appreciate that they are all individual and, therefore, different. Some of mine have been a little vocal, another only her breathing was loud until orgasm when she let out a strained groan. Another let out gentle moans throughout her build up and a prolonged one as she came. Another was silent and I even had difficulty hearing her empassioned breathing, though, another would hold her breath as her arousal built up and she would only breath out of necessity - breathing heavily in bursts an then holding her breath again. When she came, she would become very very red from face to breasts and take only very short breaths, rapidly, and then burst into a form of convulsion as she peaked and came. Once she hit the peak, she would breath heavily because she was so short of breath. (Best way that I can describe it). And one was very vocal. It didn't do much for me because it sounded like I was in a porno movie. She said later she wanted me to know she was enjoying it (which meant it was fake). She didn't fake her orgasm though and I told her that's what let me know she enjoyed it. She was quite quiet from then on and said not needing to vocally show me she was enjoying it allowed her to have more intense pleasure and orgasms. Let her be herself, in every way. Appreciate she is not 'other women' and therefore, not like them. Learn the more nuanced signs of her arousal and pleasure and enjoy them. my 2c
That would turn me off and I agree with Straightma1e; discuss what she likes when outside that sexy environment. For me, I love to learn new things, it can be a learning experience (especially when the relationship is new) and, also, excellent foreplay. I think; if she needs to tell her guy what to do whilst in the throes of sex, (rather than just enjoying it), he must be a novice and he mustn't know what works for her.
my first wife and I had been high school sweethearts. We lost our virginity to each other and for about 12 years had never experienced other lovers. She was noisy when she came, never made much noise during the actual sex but when she orgasmed it was loud. That was my experience of women. We started "swinging" and I experienced other women. I found they were all different. They ranged from being passive and silent where it was hard to know if she was feeling anything from my ministrations through to aggressive, like the OP's lady with scratching and biting, and noises ranging from low moans to screamers, although my wife was the loudest I have ever experienced, and every possible combination in between. Same with guys, some come quietly, some grunt, some moan, some yell. Once you've been with someone some time you can pick the signs that they have cum if they are not immediately obvious. I suggest the OP get out and experience a number of different women.
I don't know. Maybe he was sexually naive but she did sound as though he was putting his back into it. Maybe it was turning him on. He was up her every night I was there. They showered together and she left an impression of her ass cheeks on the shower glass wall. I left to rent a room somewhere else because the wife was nervous about maybe my hearing her vocalisations and me being disturbed. She must have been holding back a bit. I love a woman who is as horny to fuck as she was. I just never got to marry one.
