Is It Normal?

Don't get hung up on what's 'normal' mate. We're all different and if it works for you guys than keep at it.

 

well reading the list 1,2,3,4,6,8,9 are me, but getting back to the question is it normal?, i hate that word normal, if we were all normal and the same life would be boring

now i will have to work on the other numbers on the list

 

Very true. My wife grew up in an abusive environment and it's had a severe impact on her ability to enjoy sex. She rarely has a vaginal orgasm during intercourse. Since 75% of women have the same sort of difficulty, or cannot achieve vaginal orgasm at all, I'm not surprised. (BTW, the kind of liberated women that we tend to find in forums like this definitely fall outside those statistics. I wish my wife was one of them!)

I know that, in cases where such blocks ARE psychological, changes in external stimulus may frequently diminish or even eliminate them. Case in point: I arranged an MFM threesome with my wife and my best friend, back in 1985. (It only lasted for about six months and ended for reasons that I won't get into here.) Once she completely accepted that both of us men found her intensely desirable sexually, and wanted to fuck her just as often as she'd allow, her sexual inhibitions fell away like an old set of shackles. She was aroused more often and never turned down sexual advances from either of us. She was also much more proud of her body in that she was much more likely to wear minimal or revealing clothing in public (she became particularly fond of loose or skimpy tops that almost guaranteed someone could see her breasts, if they were looking at her at just the right moment.) She also allowed me to resumed photographing her nude and frequently in very explicit poses. (I'd done so a couple years earlier in our marriage, but with much less comfort on her part.)

Well, that certainly drifted off topic...

 

Not really.

I'd really be interesting in seeing a sexual-psychology study that attempts to measure female humans ability to orgasm in different ways with various childhood background or traumas.

For instance I heard of a few cases where husband and wife have a great sex life, the wife gets raped by a 3rd party, and the sex in their marriage just dies, the trauma is a mental block she can't relax.

It proves that the physical anatomy and response IS possible in that women, but that traumas or even perspective are responsible for the phenomena known as Anorgasmia.

If that could be identified in how that works, is there a way to use therapy to undo negative classical conditioning or operant conditioning that holds up success in the bedroom?

Inorgasmia, how much is mental and how much is that condition due to physical reasons?

 

I'd also like to see that sort of study done, particularly if it included tested methods (and their varying degrees of success) to reduce or eliminate psychological blocks that prevent women from enjoying sex to its fullest potential.

 

Yeah, thanks for catching that autocorrect took my misspelling of Anorgasmia, and turned it into orgasm...which changed the meaning of my sentence entirely.

Just making a note, since you quoted my post, that's a typo people. I've since fixed the original post you quoted me from.

---

I don't know what one can do about physical problems, but yeah.

I also suspect men, when under lots of anxiety have their own performance issues as well under the same hypothesis that emotion plays a big role in the performance and enjoyment of sex in men as well.

We always talk about how much emotion plays a role in women's sex lives, that we forget that it impacts men a lot too, and our culture always addresses this problem with men in negative ways (i.e. bullying, the man's weak/broken, women sometimes think a man's no longer finds them attractive or loves them > relationship/romance problems).

 

I see no problem with it. In fact I've asked my man to use one of my vibes on me during foreplay... unfortunately he says he feels too uncomfortable for that right now:bigcry: (hes new at this, I hope he changes his mind once he's more experienced.)

The way I see it. On my own I can get myself off with just my hand, or a vibe, but a vibe feels 10X better. I also orgasm better with someone else doing the work than on my own. For any math people like me -- manual masturbation<being fingered by a partner, and manual masturbation<masturbation with a vibe so I assume a partner using a toy on me would be epic. Or thats my logic anyway.

But yeah I've never managed to cum from just a guy fucking me. I need clit stimulation. I prefer to orgasm at least once before penetrative sex, cause then I'm relaxed and all floaty, and then have him get me worked up again so I actually want it before the final "event".

But every lady's different, I think it depends on what she wants =]

 

:iagree:

LOVE, making is an Art
- The Palette used for the canvas on which one paints and what form and usage is made with the delicate stroke of ones paintbrush and/or deliverer of distributer one uses, is required to create a Masterpiece of Mutual appreciation ... meThinks

 

Hello- I was just wondering if you could add a 12th type of orgasm to the list - an anal orgasm- have you ever experienced this? I think it is the one type of orgasm that men and women can experience together- and know that they are feeling the same beautiful sensations- would love to hear your thoughts…

 

Mot women cum easiest from clitoral stimulation. Wife often has an orgasm or two before we fuck. Sometimes another on penetration.

 

Best orgasm for my wife is from penetration and gentle thrustings while I finger her clit as she is about to cum. The key nerve centre is in the clitoris. It must be stimulated in some way, either directly or indirectly to achieve a good orgasm. In coital alignment method, the grinding motion of the pelvis can stimulate clit without using your fingers.

 

This is an incorrect thought process men will have a prostate orgasm anally, but women lack a prostate and generally have a g spot or cervical orgasm anally depending on where you’re hitting. Do t get me wrong anal orgasms are great for my wife, but it’s not coming from her prostate.

 

This is also incorrect. There can be noodle orgasms, cervical orgasms and g spot orgasm none of those require clitoral stimulation. In general most women have clitoral orgasms and that is true for us, but before kids my wife could ride me and have g spot or cervical orgasms without clot stimulation. Now we vibe her clot while I’m doing other things for 100% success.

 

Old thread do a new one if you must.