Is chivalry dead?

I wonder if any guys will answer that. I'm curious. I'm assuming they might say sex or having a meal cooked for them. I'm looking for something more profound than that though...or maybe it's just the simple things? (just like chivalry is really, simple things that can mean so much)

 

You know what I'm gonna go expand this concept and say the "sense of entitlement" among ALL youth both guys and girls has been causing all the rudeness and stuff we see in people today.

It's not even happening along gender lines it's happening everywhere in both genders.

 

Seeing as how I view the term with it's origins in my mind, I'd say a parallel equivalent would be a 'virtuous' woman.

Sex and the way women can be nurturing are comforting.

 

so I guess women like the protective nature men can provide and men like the nurturing nature women can provide..

 

Exactly

 

Opening doors for others in itself hardly classifies as an act of chivalry. Over the centuries, the meaning of chivalry itself was forgotten. Chivalry is the way of medieval knights. It was the moral code that the knights had; be a confident warrior, fight bravely, be loyal to your king, protect the weak, have faith in God and the Church, maintain honesty, live and die in the name of honour and respect, so on so forth.

What today's people refer to as "chivalry" is nothing more than acts of human kindness.

 

making him a sandwich.

 

ha ha ha.

 

woman: "I'll make sandwiches for you if you open doors for me"
man: "you got a deal!"

 

*opens door*

 

..white or wheat?

 

wheat

 

So everyone who opens doors automatically says that he can overpower you?
wut

 

Is that all you heard?
Because I heard "yes, I may be stronger than you but I respect you."

By defining a difference between men an women there is an unwritten understanding that men are physically stronger (even most feminist will admit that on average they are) and chivalry was an unspoken statement that I will not use that strength to overpower you.

 

Chivalry is not dead, just selectively practiced (and of course righteously so).

 

BONUS: I will even carry your heavy packages for you too (if you will get me a beer).

 

I think it's also important to note that being virtuous does not in of itself mean that one is a prude.

I think for a while, and maybe even now, if a women holds virtuous traits about her character, a common insult thrown at her by her peers would be to call her a prude or a 'stick in the mud', or in some way giving off vibes of being judgemental.


But I agree that men do want women to be nurturing and supportive with them. I think this quality is as important as sex, if not more important, in a relationship. I say this because now that I think about it, a lot of bad sex can involve the physical act but lack the emotional synergistic nurturing and appreciative aspect to it that implies something is wrong in a relationship.

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I think the challenge of this generation is to find a balance between the rhetoric of the liberated woman today, and the concepts of virtue woman of the past held, only this time without the negative dogmas, logical fallacies, and redacted truths that paved the foundation for why a feminist movement happened in the first place.

The sense of entitlement has to go as well, but this is partially a separate issue given that the children of Generation Y, have grown up too much with the "You're special and deserve the ____" doctrine by simply existing.

Give em self-confidence, but don't give em a big head either.

 

Ok, I'll admit being supportive and nurturing to my husband does not sit well with me. It makes me feel like he's looking for praise and approval like his mother would give him. With him particularly, everything is a oneway street anyway.

 

Well there's limits to it of course.

I wasn't implying BLIND dogmatic devotional support. If men need THAT much support from their significant other, than that usually implies that the guy has internal issues about himself he needs to work through before relying on someone else.

Is that the kind of nurturing support you are opposed to?

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For example I'm not against a wife pointing out to her husband that he's making a stupid mid-life crisis purchase on a 400K vacation home or something when there are PRAGMATIC and logical reasons pointing out why the decision is a bad one.

The only catch is that the wife better have the ethos and not a doublestandard to argue her point. If she's frivolously spending money on the newest purchases (shoes, purses, high end makeup) while arguing for fiscal conservatism in the household on his part it's not go over so well.

 

Its attention seeking. And he doesn't grant it to anyone. It's kind of narcissistic.