Discussion in 'Transexual and Transgender' started by Samhain, Aug 25, 2006.
Hi and welcome!
I'm James, and I live in Michigan. I'm fifteen years old, and I've always felt that I was more of a guy then anything else...that's to say, I didn't really fit in with the girls. Sortive like I was on the outside looking in on them. I'm not really sure what to call myself yet. I don't really like the idea of calling myself "transexual" or "transgendered", because in my mind, I'm already a guy. My body just isn't following suit...
Um, some random stuff about me...
I have an androgynous-ish girlfriend that I met on a glbt forum.
My favorite color is purple.
I'm a vegan.
I'm an atheist.
I love playing the violin and piano.
I'm in the advanced choir at my highschool.
I have asthma.
My favorite movie is Jurassic Park.
And I'm very excited to meet people who feel the same as I do about their gender!
just wondering if there are any transpeople in south jersey? Sometimes i feel like im the only one. PM is u wanna talk.
Hi.... This is the first kind of forum where you hasnt be 18 years to go on it...
lets introduce myself.. i am Jolien,17 years transgender badly enough ..; i'm now taking my androcure and in the mont of februari i possibly have my hormones...
Myself cant accept it entirely, but i made the choice to go on with it.. couse i have to..
otherwise i end dead.
I still have 1 year to go to school as a boy and after that i can leave my past behind.
I hate transvestites and shemales.... nothing personal but.. they made everyone on scvhool think i'm gay or a transvestite that acts like a shemale of a sexsite...
Ihope this is a good forum and not for sex things... :s
I hope that i will make many friends here and have help on things that confuse me..
and that i will survive school couse i wil have to destroy my male character that i use as a defend shield... That i used for years..; i'm a little affraid of it , couse by my hormones i get, i will get me real me, out of my walled prison i made for being safe..
and that people dont going to bullying me again...
as i said, i still are scared for wats going to happen to me... but i have no choice, its that or falling into a depression... i wish i was never born.. , but i will try and go trough it... after all its for a period tuff but after, i can be myself without a "thing" ;... i can finally be happy than...
ps: i live in belgium lol dont look fr it on the map couse you wont find it its too small.
and also like others.. i think 'im the only transgende that is in belgium , makes me feel bad...
also.. like james i dont like the word transsexual or transgender.... with thesame reason, those words sounds like a curse, a desease for me..
xxx a shy girl :$
New to this forum. Thought I'd say hello.
I'm a FTM transsexual guy. I identify completely 100 percent as male. I also happen to be gay.
I don't know a great deal of other trans people my age (I'll be 17 on the 30th of this month). Figured this would be a great way to connect with some people.
I feel just the same. I will not refer to myself as either of those terms. "Trans" means to change. How can you become something you feel you already are?
Those labels are really just there for people who have trouble identifying people with gender dysphoria with the gender they see themselves as. (Which is most people)
I feel the same way... I don't want to be a trans anything... I'm a girl, and that's that!
Hey all. I haven't read through this entire thread yet, and I am compelled to post after reading Snowdancer's response here:
For me, this is all very new in a way, yet also... the pieces fall into place more and more, y'know? An early memory that haunts me is being at the beach with several elementary school friends and their older brothers. A yelling match broke out between two of the brothers, and it was very uncomfortable for me: the sudden tension in the air seemed to drive me to action, so I stepped in, verbally, and tried to moderate the situation. This was met by a very harsh rebuff from the older brother, someone about three to five years older than I was at the time, if I remember correctly. I think I was probably 7 or 8. Anyhow, I was effectively silenced by this kid, who told me, in way too many decibels, "You know what your problem is?? You are always sticking your nose in where it doesn't belong!!" Very hateful and hurtful. No, I didn't know that was my problem. NO, I wasn't aware that that was a bothersome thing for him or anyone, and I didn't realize that I did it frequently (I'm not sure even now that I did). Anyhow, the result of this confrontation and other powerfully negative, silencing reactions from people led me to shut down that part of me that longed to nurture and communicate, to question and break down barriers and hostilities--except the questioning never really got shut down. Instead, I turned it inward into a pathological, nattering, self-criticism; too much hyper-critical introspection and self-analysis, for too many years. This led to more silence, more isolation, and eventually a recurring clinical depression. A suicide attempt. A recovery, then back down the slippery slope, looking for any foot- and handholds I could find.
But I am not looking for pity. I am looking for insight and support into who I am. Male, female, transgender? Does it matter? I am in a serious, committed relationship with a woman who now knows of my current 'gender struggles' (more on those struggles in a bit, or in another post, perhaps). Sometimes when I read about transsexuals who have completely transitioned, I think about that and how it would be. HRT is a big question mark in my mind.
I am glad that Samhain started this thread, and that ze is here. I think ze and I have some things in common: born in a male body, inclined to present as female. Recently I have been trying on my partner's clothes at home. I love skirts! They are sooooo comfortable and give this amazing freedom of movement feeling. I toy with mascara and lip gloss. I've always been attracted and fascinated by gentle-looking, natural (little make-up), hippie-ish women; I am beginning to wonder if that is (partly?) because that is ME, that is how I would like to present. Yes, I think maybe so.
Lately I have been getting these incredible emotional waves of well-being. First they started as pulses, then grew to waves, now when they come they are often standing pools of contentment and rightness that I am able to swim in. Really it feels like a letting go and a return to a more Original Mind, back to an innocence and naturalness I knew as a child, which was stunted, stifled, beaten, and repressed by society for years, years, decades, decades.
It makes me sad... has made me sad; now I am beginning to abide in Joy.
Yet I value the male in me, too. Testosterone is my ally, allows me to stand up in outrage at all the bullshit that has been silently perpetrated against me for years, years, years. Silently, stealthily, subtly--it is not any person's fault, but I am very angry with the programming of a society that stifles individualism and has tried to cut the heart right out of my nurturing personality. I am and have been and will continue to be very angry at this same society which opresses people because of skin color, gender, sexual orientation, religious creed. It's all BULLSHIT, and I am here, on this planet, not to stand against it, but to stand for Creativity and Love. To stand against something is to acknowledge and reinforce its strength. The small-minded, petty oppression of 'civilization' will not continue to sap me or get the satisfaction of using me as a dead tool to reinforce its own fucking pathologies. Pardon my language. I am here to root Consciousness in Love. I will stand as I am, beautiful and shining, compassionate, a rainbow.
Thanks all for being here, and now I, the drama queen, leave the stage for the next actress or commentator.
Well...to introduce myself.
Im 15, and a girl at the moment but totally hating it. Ive wanted to be a boy since I could talk. Luckily I have a really supportive family which makes things loads easier but things are still pretty tough. I have lived as a boy since I was about 4, which was when I finally persuaded my Mum to chop all my hair off . Happy day!!
Being so young yet so keen to have surgery is pretty annoying. Nobody professionally is really prepared to listen so things are going to have to wait. Ive been to psychologists and stuff to get things started but I think thats as far as its going to go until Im at the very least 16.
Well, enough about me. I know Im young but I have lived a long time as a lad. If anyone wants to chat or anyone to talk to im here. Probbly best to email me tho, I check that really regularly.
Its so good to know there is a place to chat to other people kinda in the same boat.
Hope to speak to you soon
I'm FtM and I have been for about all of my life just about. It became more dominate during puberty, terrible time. not a lot of people really understood me fully, I guess because I'm not all completely masculine. I don't fit the general stereotype that the south wants me to be, so that makes me an outcast. Im just too energetic for my own good, and rather flamboyant at times. My friends have always been there for me, and accept me for what and who I am, but most of all, my boyfriend accepts me the most. He's always thought of me as a guy, which makes us gay. And we are perfectly fine with that. I'm the twink in the relationship though X3
I'm really glad I have him, because my life would have been a whole lot harder than it has been already. He's just so sweet to me. Ever since he first met me, he thought I was a boy, so when I told him, he didn't seem fazed. In fact, it made our relationship stronger.
I'm Michael, 17 yo FTM. Only just put a name to it a few months ago. I've been struggling for years to figure myself out, went through all the terms, tried on lesbian and bi and all of that. Definitely didn't fit. Mostly I'm sexually attracted to men-- eventually I can call myself a gay man. Gay transman. It is a tremendous relief to know what I can call myself, and even more to know I'm not the only one.
Anyway, came out to my mum just a week before I left home (on an exchange programme for a year) She took it really well, told me she loves me and will always support me. It's more important that I be her child than her daughter. We went to a trans-friendly psychotherapist twice in one week, she was incredibly helpful, just let me talk, which helped me straighten things out for myself. My mum did tell my dad though, and I'd hoped she would rather than me having to do that... but it was definitely the wrong time. My dad reacted so badly, I've never seen him more angry. He told me first thing: "you will always be my child, but you will never be my son." From there he went on to tell me I've talked myself into something absurd, I've allowed myself to be influenced by television and internet... disregarding that every bit of research I did was from medical and psychology books. He said "you have no idea what it is to be a man", a totally chauvenistic phrase on top of being false. Anyway, that was two months ago. When I talk to my dad on the phone or by email it never comes up. He has always done this to me, taken something I do or am that he dislikes extremely personally, reacting explosively, and then pretending it never happened. My mum is still totally supportive, is also trying to get me something more comfortable and safe for binding.
I find this community very helpful, although getting replies is rather slow because there are relatively few here. I wish all of you peace and success on your journeys, whatever steps you decide to make.
Hi Im a MtF transgender from Australia, i've being thinking all of my life that i have being a little crazy but other than knowing that i had depression i had no idea what was going on.
I am a FtM transgender person. I just started going to therapy and I'm on my way to getting hormones very soon. I've felt this way my whole life (which I'm sure everyone else has as well). I bind my chest down to keep people from knowing it's there. I've tried to convince myself that I'm a lesbian and that worked for a while, but now, it just doesn't seem like it's enough. Everyone who's met me (away from family here), met me as a man and it will continue to be that way.
Thankfully, my family is very accepting (the ones who matter, at least).
My parents have both said they knew my whole life and my mother actually tried to get me to go to therapy once, but I didn't open up.
It feels good to know that this has happened to other people beside myself and it feels great to know I'm on my way to looking the way I feel.
I'm a human who is supportive of trans people and interested in learning more about the things that affect their lives. I have a friend who is a M2F trans and she is a great person and so fun to talk to.
Hi! I found a link here from a webpage I visit for trans-related issues, and it seems like a nice forum so I thought I'd stop by. I'm a 30-something female, post transition (mostly). I started hormones in June of 2005, and had the lower surgery in 2006. Coming up on, umm, about 2 years since I got all fixed up down there
I think it's great that people are getting this taken care of early, like some of the men here whose posts I've been reading. It's my personal view that from the little bit of research that has been done so far (not nearly enough!) that this is some kind of condition caused by variant hormone levels in the womb... and there is no way to really address that except by fixing the body to match. And the younger you take care of it, the better.
It would be great if people could get the proper hormones at puberty so growth and all that other stuff would be more in-line with your real 'gender'. (I put that in quotes because it is such a loaded term, but you know what I mean right? hehe) But even if you aren't that lucky, there is a lot to be said for doing it in the 18-early 20's. I think the men have a little bit more leeway there due to the nature of the way testosterone works and all that- don't let time cause you angst, there is plenty of it to get everything sorted if you need to settle some things before making decisions.
It's nice to meet on an open forum like this! Too often everything is all exclusionary and specific to one 'group' or another. I always felt like there was an information gap without being able to talk to the guys about this stuff hehe. Hope I can offer a little insight based on my personal experience to anyone that is curious, and learn something new from others!
hi, i am new here. actually, i had this username many years ago, but have just rediscovered this site. i am a 23 year old transman from florida, 2 years on testosterone and post-op. i'm happy to share my experience and offer any advice i can.
I may be moving to Florida later on in the year. when I do, I'll have to find a new doctor for T. who do you work with?
hi, i am in jacksonville, but use a doctor based out of gainesville. he is no longer taking new patients, though. i can give you the name of someone in orlando and can also probably help you find a doc in south florida or the tampa area also if that is where you'll be.
where are you moving to? how long are you on t?
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