it has been three months since my girlfreind broke up with me. i should be better by now. i should have forgotten about what happened. And I get sad when she talks about her new guy on these forums and I know im a loser for letting it get to me. And after everything I still care and I try not to. Each day it gets so hard and I have nobody and I really arnt doing too well. I cant face crowds of people still so i cant meet anyone. i cant be bothered playing the games people play in order to get someone. i just say and do what ever without worrying if it makes me attractive or not. i dont care anymore. my bed is too big and i dont want to have sex with people i dont really like so i havent had sex in soooo long. and she talk about how good her new guy is on here, when im sure i wasnt bad but i just get so depressed. i feel terrible that she is having a good time and im not which is really immature i guess. i know its my own fault but i just cant seem to move anywhere. im stuck. i just sit there and especially late at night i stay awake with tears in my eyes. i dream of her when i sleep and dream that everything is how it used to be when things were good and then i wake up in the morning and feel terrible when i realise its not real. I cant see any point in trying to "fix myself" or what ever, when I was trying to do that for years, when she just left me for some guy who was nowhere near as good as me and if I went out with someone like that i would be ashamed and ebarrassed to even be seen with them. but i know i cant keep going on like this. i must be terrible. i know i cant rely on another person for love. i cant rely on anyone. what do you do when you think about dying but you know you cant? help... im pathetic i know. im sorry.