Im sorry Im homophobic.. but listen to this i might be gay

Discussion in 'Coming Out and Confused!' started by Incubus, May 11, 2004.

  1. Incubus

    Incubus Banned

    I heard that if your homophobic you could be a gay in denial, I dont think Im gay but when i smoke pot i realize when im not stoned i act really bitch. Like I cant do shit for myself and i always ask my friends to help me, I enjoy the attention. I dont ever think about fucking ne of them and Ive had sex with alot of girls, Im really scared of a subject that has gay in it, I act squirmish and uncomfertable. I also have a gay step grandpa so that makes it hard to always avoid the whole gay concept, I also cannot get off very easy when im with girls and I wonder if its my body or I am not trully satisfied with thme. I dont knwo... Im just confused. I also love incubus i think brandon boyd is hot, there i said it wow... dont make fun of me
     
  2. Ginge

    Ginge Ye Olde Member

    No one's gonna make fun of you! At least I'm not.

    Hmm, well...instead of shying away from the topic, or thinking of it as a "bad" thing, you should try opening up your mind to the possibility and dabble a bit. I don't think any of us could tell you if you're gay--that's only something you would know. But living in denial is not living at all. And the body never lies. :)

    And just a side note, PLENTY of straight men can admit when they find another man attractive. Doesn't mean they're gay. Just shows they're secure enough with themselves to say such things.
     
  3. Incubus

    Incubus Banned

    thanks for your response, I really appreciate your kind words, I am not able to rule out the fact that I love pussy. I think IF i liked men i would probably be bi, because I could never not love the look of a womens ass.

    On that note, I cannot watch a porno that has two lesbian women going at it and be turned on... I have to see a dick penetrating does that mean I like the dick or the idea of the penetration
     
  4. Ginge

    Ginge Ye Olde Member

    I don't know...you could like the dick, or the penetration, or both, or just intercourse in general. I mean, I have to have my cake with frosting on it, but I cannot stand the taste of frosting by itself.

    I think I just confused myself with that analogy. LOL But all in all, I think what you're going through is very normal. My cousin is the same way, and he just considers himself bi-curious. :)

    Personally, I don't think you should really worry about trying to label your sexuality (gay, straight, bi). Just enjoy it! And you're not alone. [​IMG]

    But if you are wondering, I'm a straight girl. You may not think I'm the best candidate to be dishing out advice on this issue, but I just thought I'd give my two cents. :)
     
  5. monosphere

    monosphere Holly's Hubby

    I have to agree. Don't worry about the labelling yourself. Just let yourself sit back and truly think about what it means to be gay. Bottom line, if you aren't romantically attracted to men, then you are straight. Remember that most guys have had thoughts or dreams involving sexual encounters with other men at some point in their lives. It's just part of us growing up and discovering our sexuality. Maybe you're truly concerned and paranoid because deep down you're rather curious about the concept? That's not saying you'd be into it, but could it be that there's something about homosexuality that you find curious or maybe you want to understand a little better? One phormer phobic phriend speculates that his discomfort around homosexuality was due to him not being able to fathom the attraction to each other. Since he's straight, he couldn't see what two men saw in each other. He's the type of guy who likes to try to understand everything. So he started trying to visualize two men with each other. Then he watched a gay porn(stupid man) and was completely turned off by it. So, he was unbelievably uncomfortable around gay men for a while. Look at me, I'm going off on a tangent.

    You have so many options of what to do in your situation. One of which is watching a gay porn, but after my buddy's experience, I wouldn't suggest it. You could decide to explore these concerns if yhou're brave enough, but if you do, you might get a little confused. Sex is going to feel good no matter the gender. If you're getting a blowjob, you're not going to care who's giving it to you. But what about romantic feelings? Intimacy? A relationship? Could you see that? Could you see yourself walking down the aisle with a man?(If we could ever get that legalized in this fucked up country) Cuddling up by the fire in each other's arms? Walking along the beach holding hands? There's more to sexuality and sex than the mere physical aspect of it. Just something to consider if you're going to satisfy your curiosities. Another thing to remember is that fantasy and reality are two different things. Reality might be completely different than what you pictured in your head and you might be a little disappointed.

    Honestly, I doubt you're gay or bi(although I've been wrong about these things before). I think that you're similar to my friend. I think you don't completely understand homosexuality and is therefore constantly thinking about it to try to learn what it's all about. As a result, maybe you think there'a possibility you're also gay and it scares you. Or I could be completely wrong about everything here. Sexuality is such a grey area that it tends to be different for each person.

    I admire those who have the guts to ask questions to try to learn and understand than I do those who will dismiss us because we're just a little different. I'm sorry you feel uncomfortable about homosexuality, but I thank you for talking to us about it and I hope that at least a littel part of this post is helpful to you.

    Peace, Love, Dope
    Monosphere
     
  6. tourmaline

    tourmaline Member

    very well put monosphere, couldn't do it better myself... i would just like to inform you of the Kinsley Scale, it goes something like this...

    1 - exclusively heterosexual
    2 - mainly heterosexual, with occasional homosexual feelings
    3 - mostly heterosexual with increased homosexual feelings
    4 - equally interested in both sexes
    5 - mostly homosexual with increased heterosexual feelings
    6 - mainly homosexual with occasional heterosexual feelings
    7 - exclusively homosexual

    thats somewhat accurate :p

    everyone comes in somewhere, i'm in at 6-7, but ironicly, as they say that only 10% of the population is homosexual, only 10% is heterosexual, the rest are somewhere in between... try and be open and honest with yourself, recognize that homosexuals are only different from heterosexuals in the gender desired, and have an open mind to new possibilities!
     
  7. Fishndude

    Fishndude Member

    Well for one thing I'm not gay but if I was I think I would like to get it on with Abe Vigoda,now theres a sexy male.:)
     
  8. i think im a 3 or a 4....

    not that anyone asked...

    just throwing that out there.... :D
     
  9. Rockstock2004

    Rockstock2004 Member

    Incubus, may I suggest maybe why you feel that way?

    1) A gay or bi guy likes the dick, therefore ALL of them just about give head, where only some girls do.

    2) A gay or bi guy likes to take it in the ass, therefore almost all do, where only a few girls like that.

    So with that said, if you like to get head, or give it in the ass, then that might be why,. because ass, and mouth are the same, who cares what the face looks like, as long as its the ass you are screwing, and the mouth that is sucking you...Can I be maybe right in this subject and helped you out more?
     
  10. Incubus

    Incubus Banned

    tthanks for the input guys, I really think I just dont know enough about homosexuality to know anything forsure, I can tell you I would never want to kiss or do anything like that with a male, but I think other males are attractive so i dont know.
     
  11. monosphere

    monosphere Holly's Hubby

    Like it was mentioned before, there's nothing wrong with finding a man attractive. You can see someone as attractive without being attracted to them. Does that make sense? It's just that most guys are so insecure with their manhood that they would never admit it in a milion years. Don't worry. You're not alone in your thoughts. Chances are that the guy next to you had similar thoughts at some point in his life.
     
  12. Benny DaBuff

    Benny DaBuff Member

    Don't know if I'm misunderstanding you Rock, but that sounds like a gross generalization. In my experience at least, most gay sexual encounters don't end in anal sex. Oral sex is more common.
     
  13. meishka

    meishka Grease Munky

    anal se is the least performed anal activity. and i could go for antonio banderas. but i'm straight. i'd say two. even for a hicktown thats pretty gay. the last couple of weeks i've been calling people in wodshop homophobes. i'm gonna get my ass beat one day. bunch of rednecks. oh well
     
  14. renee

    renee Member

    I have gay friends. :cool:
     
  15. Mui

    Mui Senior Member

    incubus are you sure you dont wanna make out in the corner? Pweeeeeeeze....
     
  16. Samhain

    Samhain Lifetime Supporter Lifetime Supporter

    Is that true that only 10% of people are truely heterosexual where did you hear that?

    also i really like your thoughts on the subject Monosphere very well put.

    s
     
  17. monosphere

    monosphere Holly's Hubby

    Thank you Sam, as well as you, tourmaline.

    I don't know if I can completely agree with there only being 10% Heteros. I do think that more people lean to the hetero side of that scale than the homo side. i do like the concept of that Kinsey scale with varying degrees of sexuality. It's not as black and white as some people think. I guess I'd classify as bisexual leaning a little towards women, but that's partially because men tend to dirtier, more abrasive, and just plain rude. That and for some reason, it's harder for me to cuddle up to a straight man than it is for me to cuddle up to a lesbian(totally platonic on both accounts) and I'm a guy who likes to cuddle. So for the Kinsey scale, I think I'm closer to a 3 than a 4.


    That is very true. I don't understand why everyone continues to corrolate gay encounters with anal sex. Yet another stereotype that is not true.
     
  18. tourmaline

    tourmaline Member

    what is meant by 10% heterosexual is actually, exclusivly heterosexual.... and remember that scale deals with true sexuality, and not behavior, the majority of heterosexuals is probably caused by our societies taboos about homosexuality (mostly against gay) causing many people who are mainly heterosexual to appear that they are exclusivly heterosexual (in sexuality, not behavior). i love you all, by the way, whatever sexuality you have or don't!:)
     
  19. RxHEAD

    RxHEAD Member

    I can see what your saying and there have been alot of different comments. I for up to my 18years of age thought I was strictly Gay. Then I lost my Hertero Virginity to a woman. We were on and off like years, only she knew I had been with guys (oral) before her. So finally we were were broke up once again and I lost my anal virginity as well at 18 yrs old.

    So it is like I am mostly gay, and have been with more men than women however have had romantic feelings for both. So now I just don't have sex with guys or women. Too complicated as I may be straight cause I am not having sex with either sex.

    hell I don't even know what the hell I am talking about just don't worry man It will all be alright in the end.
    Peace
     
  20. Closet Kid

    Closet Kid Member

    Seriously being gay isn't a bad thing the first time I enjoyed gay porn I felt guilty I know how you feel. But someone you know is probably still in the closet that you know. I'm still the same person I always was when I thought I was straight and i'm the same guy now that I know I'm Gay

    LATE,
     

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