I'm gonna be late for work because....

my puppy turned nasty for some unexplained reason.

 

Balgis stole my harley...;-)

 

I had a fine to pay.

 

true story: i passed out at 9:30p(new years eve night) woke up at 2:00a, had to be at work at 12:00a. had gf call and tell them i went to jail for public intox. called later the next day told them i just got out and asked if i still had a job(pumping gas) and they said no problem

 

an old fashion police phone box landed in my garden and this pedo looking guy came out of it, so I shot him.

 

I was abducted by aliens (and yes, I've used that several times to the same employer)

 

A deal has been struck to reinvent me as a white elephant.

 

a pizza pop exploded all over the house. and i gotta clean it up.

 

“I was late because it is the will of God for me to be late today and I don’t have any choice but to accept the fact that I was late and that goes for you too.”

 

I was late cuz I got lost on these boards!

 

:smilielol5:....

 

My dad was mad at me!

 

got the wrong gas for the space heater,, it go boom...

 

I'm going to be late for work because, I have an interview for another job because you are a fkn slave driver and I hate your smelly guts you old perv!

 

I can't make bail...this time it's set at $750,000

 

i jizzed in my pants

 

I'm being followed by a shadow of fear.

 

I have to walk slow because the skin between my toes cracked open :leaving:

 

She showed up again....;-)

 

All the paper work messed up my transport.