i'm cheating on my boyfriend....

I know! and it's quite annoying, and absolute nonsense.

 

That isn't what is happening here... or at least, it isn't what everyone has done.

You are 100% correct in that this one thread (or even a combination of her threads) doesn't paint the 'whole picture' of her. What it does do however, is paint a section of that picture quite clearly, and what the rest of the picture may or may not look like becomes irrelevent.

She could be the most amazing person in every other regard, but what she portrayed of herself here is a deal breaker for a lot of people (at least judging by the responses here).

 

You can't Love your boyfriend if you can even cheat on him nevermind feeling no guilt. That isn't love in my books!

I think you should end the relationship. Maybe one day you will experience real love.

Don't go hurting other people because you enjoy being naughty.

 

Ok, i agree.

 

What I meant was even in person, we don't know anyone we interact with - no matter how close.

 

Yea Duck, i agree. But we tend to continue to build pictures up in our heads of who we think they are, which is fine, but it's ultimately not true.

But yea, we're on the same page with the fact that we can't truley "know" even the most intimate of people that we are in touch with. But that's a great thing. It's a neverending discovery and unfolding.

 

Yeah, exactly.

The idea of a solid state human is an illusion created by our physical side. I think it's kinda sad though =P

 

The OP chose to portray herself that way. The forum selected as well as the word choice said a lot about what was the likely objective of the discussion. Using the concept of "free love" to justify deceitful behavior paints the concept a color that those believing in it may not wish to assume as a value.

The subsequent "confusing boy" discussion in its timing suggested a rewrite and a self-re-portrayal akin to changing bait when the desired fish hasn't been caught- in this case that "fish" being the enabler who would say the deceit is anything but what it really is.

The OP does not strike me as being particularly interested in making things right- but to redefine right in order to validate something I doubt she's interested in changing... or learning anything from.

 

*stands and starts clapping*

 

.

 

This mostly occurs with guys... but some people say that love and sex are totally separate things and you can still cheat on someone but love them.
but I think this is bullshit.
because if you really loved someone, you'd put your own sexual desires aside and do what it took to make them happy because you know damn well it would only hurt the one you love if they were to find out...

 

Love and sex are separate things, you can still sleep with other people if you love someone as long as there is open communication going on about what the relationship is about and all that. It's the cheating part that's not ok.

People can try and even justify the cheating thing but I think it's very immoral no matter how much you claim to love the person.

 

As most people here have said its only ok to sleep with someone else as long as there is open communication about it with your BF GF and as long as they are ok with it. however this can cause jealousy issues. My ex gf from back in the day gave me an amazing 3 way for my birthday but it was not the best of choices because it kinda made things rough a few months later and she start getting jealous.

 

yes i cheated. yes i was deceitful... when i originally posted this thread I didnt feel any guilt or pain because i had been hurting for so long that it didnt matter any more. now that me and my ex are no longer together (because i told him the truth and i got what i rightly deserved) and its been weeks since we broke up, everything is sinking in and i feel like absolute crap. i've learnt my lesson, one of my friends (who is constantly trying to sleep with me) suggested at sleeping with me while he has a gf and I told him to fuck off... i've learnt my lesson.
so my ex wasn't the right man for me, if we were truly meant to be then i wouldnt have strayed. i have suffered extreme anxiety and panic attacks since i had been with that guy. so breaking up has been the best thing for me.
this was the first guy i cheated on, and it will be the last. i probably wont let myself get another boyfriend for a long time. but in the meanwhile, i'm 21, single, and i will do whatever i like Real life, is great.

 

Part of me wants to think that you are trying to justify your actions a little, and stop looking so 'bad' -- but of course you're going to defend yourself when so many here have made you out to be such a bad person.

I think the part that I underlined is partially true. (I bolded the other part so I wasn't making you look bad by underlining it =P)
I think that being with the wrong person is why a lot of people end up cheating, and I don't understand why they don't see the relationship being so unfulfilling. Actually, you have any theories on why you didn't?

I find it really odd that you didn't mention any real problems with him before, and that you were so clearly unhappy in the relationship as the thread progressed. I don't understand it at all.

And I don't know if I said it before, but I think the taking time off from relationships is a great idea.
It seems like so many people just go from relationship to relationship and don't have any time to reflect and relax between. To get better at them for the future, or to focus on themselves for a while. So, after being in relationships a lot since you were that young - it seems like it's pretty important to take a break.

 

Well its good that you told him the truth and did not keep it from him for too long. And welcome to the single world.... Its fun on this side.

 

Hey, it's fun on this side of things too +_+

Bad stereotype.

It's just a more open kind of fun (for non-swingers =P)

 

:iagree:

 

This is true it is fun on that side of thins too but right now im happy were im at......

 

Hi, I want to tell you " truth " behind feelings as I see it. Every girl is desine by nature to have 2 types of males in her life. 1 is Provider that will secure her happy life of carring and compasion. Fool that will bring you money and secure your ass. Second man is lover, man whos genes will provide best possible childred. And our brain is conditiont by that desires from begining of time.

So infidelity is just a normal state of Girls. Actually in ancient times that was nature way of selecting the best way to insure survivor.

So, back in now days. Is cheating ok? Well, I am open and honest with my desires. I lived big time of my life with multiple girls and I told them what to espect of me. From my point of view its wrong to lie yourself about your desires. But its not wrong to pursuit your happines as you see it. If it meens sex with more men that one. so be it.

So I think that you need to chose what you want to do. Live in lies or be honest. Your man probable wouldnt be ok if you tell him. But, I can tell you in my case, that that kind of stuff helpped me in other aspects of my life. I 20 years ago, stoped beeing pussy and took control of my women and fucked the shit out of her.

Now days, we are swingers and founded happines in that life style.

I can only hope that this will help you.

Garry with love!