I'm breaking up with you.

of course not; that's exactly what she wants! the revenge would be having sex and not letting her watch.

preferably several times of course.

 

*pulls up a chair and starts eating popcorn*

 

*takes chair and throws it in*
...*pulls up couch and starts drinking a coke*

 

That was my best chair

 

*gets chair back, throws in couch*

...*sits on floor*

 

If there was ever a "furniture throwing event" in the olympics, I do believe you would win.

 

probably, at least bronze, I've actually been known to throw furniture almost randomly...

 

*tosses king sized bed several hundred feet*

 

*throws bunk-bed at undies, seven hundred and two feet away*

 

*disqualifies I'minmyunderwear for using a balsa wood framed bed*

 

Shoop da Woop!

 

how did you know!?


*runs over traceroni with a bus*

 

you can't break up with me because daisy, i am your gay half brother

 

nope

 

If it is me:

I'm breaking up with you.
I hope we can still be friends.

 

I know you are not talking to me

No one breaks up with me

 

I'll take the house and car. You can keep the cat.

 

There will be no furniture throwing. This is a civilized break-up.

 

Thank God. I didn't want to be the one to make the 1st move.

 

Shhh! You are the one I am leaving them all for...