If you had God's cell phone number

haha I'd drunk dial the bitch

 

ok if i was gonna call god, that's when i'd do it, when i'm good and plastered and won't remember much the next day!

 

exactly... I'd look at my cell... wtf?! it says god? holy shit what'd I say.

 

I put an add up for gay sex on craigslist and put down my friends number. He got a call from some dude named Conrad.

If I had god's number, it'd be more severe... untill he appologises for the universe.

 

I'd have the conversation, write a book about it and make millions.

 

I'd call god up for phone sex.

*bring bring*

"This is god."

"Horny slut hotline, this is Jasmine"

"Spencer, stop calling this line is for emergencies."

"I want the holy spirit inside me!"

*click*

 

I'd ask him his address so we could hang out and talk about the universe.

 

I never have any credit on my pay-as-you-go phone so I wouldn't be able to call him.

 

I'd tell that fucker to start paying attention.I'd probably end up in everlasting booga-booga land.Asshole.

 

whether his refrigerator's running.

 

i would just ask


'what the fuck is this some kind of fucking joke?'

lol

 

i'd be like, yo, what the hell dude? what did iiiiii do?

 

haha same, I hate phones.

 

I don't like telephones. And I really don't like calling strangers. God is a stranger.

 

Id be like "Hey God can I ask you a question? How did you come up with the slide closing sequence on Gates of Delerium?"
And Steve Howe would reply "It just sort of happened."