If you had God's cell phone number

what would you ask him/her/it/everything?

 

I'd want to know what cell phone provider he/she/it was using.

 

i probably wouldn't even call...

i keep meaning to call so many damn people i just have a hard time bringing myself to do so because i always think i'm a bother, so therefore i wouldn't call him/her/it

 

It wouldn't be a bother call me anytime!

 

I'd send him pics of my nuts like I do my wife

 

stop telling what we do in private.

 

I would ask him for my own country. Called Zeetopria.

 

just nuts, no schlong? disappointing!

 

oh well of course.


her favorite are the ones of me taking my morning shit. She loves seeing how it went when she has her morning break at work

 

oh yeah i'm sure it's the highlight of her day, if only you could send the smell over the phone.

 

Hello may i interest you our new service providings?

its £73 for the first month, £9 for the next month and £46 for next 28 months.

but its free! 58 megabytings!

upsettings....

 

A friend was walking in the desert when he found the telephone to God. The setting was Burning Man, an electronic arts and music festival for which 50,000 people descend on Black Rock City, Nevada, for eight days of "radical self-expression"—dancing, socializing, meditating, and debauchery.

A phone booth in the middle of the desert with a sign that said "Talk to God" was a surreal sight even at Burning Man. The idea was that you picked up the phone, and God—or someone claiming to be God—would be at the other end to ease your pain.

to keep reading, http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/index.php?term=pto-4696.html&fromMod=emailed

 

I wouldn't call. I fucking hate telephones. God can wait to talk to me until I die.

 

got that covered. I save it all in jars, and don't seal them till AFTER she gets home so that in case she wants to sniff it, she can

 

oh i shoulda known you'd have some sort of clever plan to secure the scent of a nice morning bowel movement!

 

how could I ever let something that great go to waste?

 

It would probably be busy all the time.

I'd post his number at cool places.

 

Why?

 

from the looks of it you're a waste not ant not kinda dude, i mean damn, the clogged screen thread said that for ya!

 

yeah, but I burnt that off, I didn't save it or smoke it. I don't save any of my resin, it goes down the drain with the isopropyl