I'd like to convince my wife to try a threesomes. (Read Carefully)

Hi, I would like to convince my wife to try having a mfm and a mff threesome with me (obviously 2 separate occasions). We have talked about it a few times before and we have had same room sex with another couple a few times (no interaction except for between the ladies, fucking HOT!!! but that recently ended in disaster - but it hasn't affected our relationship, just that we wont be seeing our friends again on account of them being horrible people).

That said, my wife has always been a little tipsy when it happened and I would give the world for her to be completely sober before going down that road, AND my wife doesn't really like to talk about sexual fantasy too much. I would like to take our talks from fantasy to reality and I just don't know how to approach the topic in a more serious manner.

I am all about communication, so when the topic has come up she has said she would only do the mfm threesome, this is kinda my preference too, (my personal fantasy would be to make her the center of attention, I want her to be respected and feel ultra sexy, with enough satisfaction to keep her eyes locked in the "rolled back position" for a week straight). The challenge here is that I want to keep the "score" kinda equal (OMG I can't believe I'm that guy), so I would love to have one of each threesome, and for that little bit of BI in her to come out at least once, just for me.... I think the answer to that request will be a "no" but I really want it to be a "yes" so I feel a bit better about the mfm.

So complicated issue/challenge.... I want to have a threesome, both mfm and mff to keep it equal, the topic can be sensitive, so how do I raise the topic and where to go from there?

Also if anyone wants to throw out a deranged fantasy or two, we all love to revel....

 

Much appreciated. When I get down to the nitty gritty, I would like for her experience to be romantic and respectful. I want her to feel f***ing wonderful afterwards!

 

Just try out the MFM first, you probably won't be interested in the MFF anymore as that will seem boring in comparison

 

I'm really on the fence with this one. I want both, the problem with the two coupes thing is that even though it was hot as fuck, there was never very much mixing it up, I mean, I'm straight and so was my buddy but I just feel there were so many unexplored possibilities due to there being "enough of the opposite sex for the opposite sex", if you know what I mean.

As for the threesomes, you're kind a forced to interact with the other person in the room, so the interaction is a must. I would love to watch my wife fool around with another woman because I have seen her appetite for it and I would love to see more. I would't mind a fresh partner either, I mean my wife and I have been together for 10 years, and we have great sex but its what we have enjoyed for 10 years, sometimes something a bit "new" is exactly what you need to make the old new too.... (I should've been a rapper). I just want her to know that I am hers and hers alone afterwards.
The MFM would be very liberating for her though. I could only imagine the confidence boost she would get from servicing two guys who are very turned on because of her alone. And afterwards when we see our new friend off, I could re-claim her.

 

Have you done the MFM?

 

I have. My wife and I were in an MFM relationship with a close friend for about half a year, back in 1985 and it was really hot! (There's little that can compare to watching your close friend fucking your wife and cumming inside her, with both of them obviously loving every second of it.) The "trick" that I used to get my wife on board with the idea may not work for you. My wife was a virgin when we met. (She'd done plenty of petting with a boy friend in high school, who'd also gone down on her and finger-fucked her a great deal, but they never fucked.) Anyway, rather than rewrite the entire series of events leading up to our threesome, you can read all about it in my blog (here in this form).

My First (And Only) Threesome | Hip Forums

 

Haha! I've already read it. It sounded great! I think the only thing I want different is that I'd want her to be pleasures by me and the other guy every time.

I think I would be very jealous the first time I see it happen, was there any jealousy the first time? How did you handle it?

 

It's already a concern. That's why I would have engineer the situation to work right. But then trust is the most important thing in a relationship so I would have to find a way to trust her, I mean I don't check her phone or know where she is all the time so she has all the space in the world to be fucking someone else already, but I trust that she wouldn't deceive me, but if I ever did catch her.... Next lady for a shave please!

 

No, no jealousy the first time. However, in separate conversations (immediately following the first time), both Steve and my wife told me that they enjoyed it but stopped early because they (individually) glanced over at me watching them and both thought that I "looked angry". Once I assured them that was not to case, it was full steam ahead on the S.S. Frequent Fucking!

 

sometimes I feel I should, and I have, but nothing to see there, the truth is she leaves her phone unlocked and I get all her call records because her phone contract is in my name. But I used to be a very jealous, possessive guy, I would spend the duration of the relationship trying to catch a woman out. I never enjoyed those relationships and there was a lot to enjoy out of them, hell with one of my previous relationships would have even ranted me all my dirty desires and more, but I broke the relationship by trying to catch her out, and looking back today, she was a great gal. So I understand what you are saying but I have already told my wife that ANYTHING GOES, BUT DO NOT TRY DECEIVE ME!! So she knows that if there is anything she wants, anyone she wants, she only needs to speak and I will either let her have it or respectfully and lovingly cut her loose to pursue whatever/whoever she wants in life, I don't want to waste her life trying to make sure that she wants only me.

This brings up a thought. We all agree that cheating is bad, but what is bad about the cheating? I spend a lot of my time analyzing my thoughts and feelings and I have come to the conclusion that cheating comes in a combination of three types of cheating all mixed together;
1. Physical affair: This affair is what most would normally see and loose their shit over. You get naked with someone and there are a few grunts and its over, you don't have to like or respect or love this person. Its just an itch.... I could imagine worse....

2. Mental affair: This, along with the next type, is an affair where the two people involved might never actually touch each other, not even once. But the damage is that you are confiding in someone who is not you significant other and that is damaging to a degree but most of us are guilty for this one, even me! I have found myself having a stronger mental connection with one of my wife's friends, not thinking anything of it at first but realizing later that I had lost faith in my wife's ability to stimulate me mentally and I was confiding in her best friend instead, I was often more excited to see this woman than my own wife when we visited and this started conjuring up some intense feelings towards this other woman. I am glad my wife never noticed this because if it were her in the same position, I would have wished she just a physical affair, it would have hurt less. I have since spoken to my wife about this and explained that I would rather her do the talking while we were at her friend because I don't want to do that to her, I love and respect her too much.

3. Emotional affair: In my opinion this is the worst! Just think about it from your own experience, have you ever experienced deeper love and respect for another woman than the feelings you have for your own wife? now imagine those feelings returned? It feels even stronger, yes? Well what have you just done to your "one and only"? You have almost nullified her. You would rather share you thoughts, aspirations and feelings with another person and this lays the strongest foundation for the other two types to take over. When you get home in the evening from whatever you were doing and you see your wife you think to yourself "Oh hi wife, what monotonous thing are we doing tonight", when you see this other person, your mind is flooded with excitement and anticipation and everything is electric.
That is CHEATING! in its worst form if you ask me.

So where does all the hurt come from? Why can we chat on a forum like this about sexually sharing our wives and husbands and expect them to feel alright with it? One word; DECEIT! We are not trying to be monogamous, we know that already. but we are trying to mentally and emotionally remain connected with our other halves. To include them in our messed up fantasies and even have some fun primarily with them! Respect must be maintained to any other human, especially if you are bringing them into your marital bed but you must remember, your other half comes FIRST. And that is monogamy.

So to wrap up the thought experiment, if you are worried about your significant other with someone else, or if you want to be the most trustworthy person for your other person, then consider what comes from a conversation and what it does to your insides before you start pointing fingers at each other. Human relationships are messy and complicated and we should always make consideration for the way we handle things.

Just my thoughts on monogamy and cheating. No one needs to agree.