I thought it would be a while...

Discussion in 'Parenting' started by HippyFreek2004, Sep 2, 2005.

  1. HippyFreek2004

    HippyFreek2004 changed screen name

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    Before I ever posted one of these threads. But here I am, positive pregnancy test in hand, hoping for some good advice and tons of support.

    Before I actually missed a period, I could have sworn that I'd be a great momma. Now, I'm not sure that I want to be in this boat. Is it normal to want to run away from your own uterus?

    Don't get me wrong. I know that having a child will be wonderful, even if it does take so much time, effort, love, and patience. I know that. But all of a sudden, I can just think of a million and one other things that I could be doing right now.

    And my momma can't help me. She doesn't want to hear about this. I told her I missed a period, didn't even know if I was pregnant, and she had an anxiety attack that almost made her pass out. I don't want to tell her. I'm afraid I'd kill her. Not to mention, she's 3000 miles away. What can she do to help me?

    Right now, with the exception of you guys, I feel alone. I know I have Brian here. But he's not a woman. So, advice, hugs, anything would be appreciated right now.
     
  2. hippychickmommy

    hippychickmommy Sugar and Spice

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    No matter how sure you are of becoming a mother, when you're faced with the actual reality, it can be terrifying! But trust your instincts, know that you're going to be a great mama, and that it will all fall into place.

    Congratulations to you sweetie. I know you're filled with so many mixed emotions right now but that's completely normal! It's going to be okay, just keep telling yourself that.

    Much love and many hugs...
     
  3. Kastenfrosch

    Kastenfrosch Blaubeerkuchen!! Lifetime Supporter

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    I have not yet gone through that, but I believe that if a pregnancy is unplanned, that feelings are not always positive, and I guess that is ok! Worrying is normal, but it is good that you find someone to help! Maybe there are counseling programmes for that at your college? That would probably be the first thing I'd go to.

    And about your mother, that is hard. She probably wanted to what's the matter with you. Does she have some sort of disorder? If not, maybe you should tell it to her, better in person then over the phone, even though it is so far away.

    But best wishes for you!!!
     
  4. HippyFreek2004

    HippyFreek2004 changed screen name

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    I wish I could tell her in person! I'd really like a hug right now. but at any rate, it will have to be over the phone. I just won't know how to say it.

    As far as uni, I withdrew from Truman. I decided to take a year off and then restart as a nursing major. I might have to wait now. Because my mom said it best, "Your children will become the most important thing in your life and you'll want them to have as much knowledge and love as possible and pretty soon, you'll find yourself to be mid-30s wondering "duh"."

    I know I'll be ok. I think the universe will look out for me. Not to mention, with all the medical problems I have, the fact that I conceived at all means that this child really wants to be here. I have to respect audacity like that, even if I do feel like I should ground him/her for life as soon as it's born, just because of its stubbornness!
     
  5. DancerAnnie

    DancerAnnie Resident Beach Bum

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    Sister, you will be just fine! You'll make a great mama! Stay positive and true to you and your baby...you'll be perfectly fine!


    Love and hugs to you! Good luck!
     
  6. mynameiskc

    mynameiskc way to go noogs!

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    aw, hugs and good luck!! my parents didn't cope well with finding out i was pregnant, either. but they get over the initial shock. i think you'll be surprised at how supportive moms can be.
     
  7. HippyFreek2004

    HippyFreek2004 changed screen name

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    I had time to think about this while I was on the bus riding home from interviews. HAHAHA. I'm interviewing to nanny other children and I've just found out I'm pregnant, MARVELOUS!

    But, in my thinking, I decided that what I was most afraid of was telling parents, both Brian's and my mom. Other than that, I know what comes. I'm excited. I thought about how long ago I probably conceived and realised that there's a heart beating in there! WOW! So I'm looking into midwives and home births in the city. I'm not going to give up the thought of doing this exactly my way, even if it's not how I planned it.

    Thanks for the support, all! I'm glad to know that yall are there when I need you!
     
  8. RyvreWillow

    RyvreWillow Member

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    Telling your parents really is the hardest part, at any point in your life! They always seem to have an opinion, lol.

    Congrats, it's a crazy ride, but tons of fun!
     
  9. moominmamma

    moominmamma Member

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    Many congratulations:)


    I don't know if this makes it worse or better for you :rolleyes: , but my mother has taken all three of my pregnancies extremely badly. At the end of the day that is her problem not mine, and in retrospect I think she couldn't cope with being unable to pretend to be my older sister any more...

    From what I have read of your posts online you will make a great mummy. I think I read that you have had to overcome health problems in order to conceive? It is exactly the same for me, it always helped me to think that I was having a determined little person who really really wanted to be here on this planet...many blessings to you and your partner
     
  10. HippyLove

    HippyLove Visitor

    Lots of Love and Hugs! I was scared to death to tell my parents when I got pregnant. But my mom ended up being my best friend and my support throughout the pregnancy and now. Once the shock wore off she became so excited to be a grandma. Hopefully everything ends up good for you and your mom. You will be an awesome mama! Lots of luck to you in everything!! :p
     
  11. drumminmama

    drumminmama Super Moderator Super Moderator

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    Are we ever ready to be a mama?
    For sanity and a few good laughs (that's the category feft off the food pyramid, ya know) see Ariel Gore's book "the Hip Mama Survival guide."
    Then read Spiritual Midwifery..even if you have in the past.
    And someone should be told what you need most is a subscription to Mothering magazine.
    Congrats and welcome to the world of mamas
    ....wait..isn't your mom on these boards? do you want her to READ the news?
     
  12. HippyFreek2004

    HippyFreek2004 changed screen name

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    she hasn't visited in a while. And I think she knows already. I mean, she knew about the nausea, missed period, etc. So I think she knows, but doesn't want it confirmed.
     
  13. lace_and_feet

    lace_and_feet Super Member

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    Wow, have you been trying to get pregnant or do you use birth control?
     
  14. Earthy Mama

    Earthy Mama Feel my wrath... ;)

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    oh I wish I could give u a big hug right now! I know how you feel, your sooo happy and then so afraid... I have two already but I still feel this way since this is unplanned. You are going to be a wonderful mommy... you are a beautiful kind hearted woman with so much love to give. Just keep reminding yourself that YOU know you can do it... and if you need to talk message me anytime. :)
     
  15. HippyFreek2004

    HippyFreek2004 changed screen name

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    thanks, Earthy Mama!

    Brian and I have talked about this, and we're going to keep it. Besides the fear of telling parents and financial worries, we feel ok about this. Very excited. We have our first pre-natal visit WITH A MIDWIFE (homebirth advocate, no less) on Monday. :D
     
  16. tigerlily

    tigerlily proud mama

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    **huggggggs** i've never gone through this myself, but i empathize with you. i know you'll make a fantastic mommy and your mom will get over the initial shock soon i'm sure :) oh yeah.. and congratulations :)
     
  17. crystalstarr

    crystalstarr Word

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    yay congrats!!!!
     
  18. HippyFreek2004

    HippyFreek2004 changed screen name

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    so, I told my mom. Hurdle number one. She bawled and cried and sobbed about how she wanted better for me than to end up like her. I understood all that. But she had the audacity to tell me to move back to Missouri until I had the baby. To leave Brian and come stay with her. It just seemed so wrong. Pissed me off.

    Other than that, my brothers all took it very well. Teasing me about whether or not their nephew will be a boy or a girl...haha....15 year old humour.

    And my mom called back to tell me to quit smoking pot, change my diet, drink more orange juice to get more folic acid. You know, the normal mom stuff. :)

    So, next hurdle: Telling BRIAN's parents. Oh goody.
     
  19. environmental_junkie

    environmental_junkie Member

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    Aww sweetie congrats, your ment to have a baby at this time it's something that you are ready for and will help bring more prospective to your life also..funny how things work.

    I will be the first to say I think your gonna have a girl :)

    Also you need one of those preg. counter things all the other mamas have on this site(in their sig.)

    I think you know your ready.
     
  20. willowbaby89

    willowbaby89 Member

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    I dont know alot about kids or babies since I am one myself but anyways
    -big hug-
     

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