I Think I Saw Too Much (Lsd, Shamanism, And Spirituality)

Hello Friends, it has been awhile since I have posted anything here. Haven't seen much conversation in this part of the forums, I know most of the talk happens in the synthetics now a days, but I thought I'd leave this here to hopefully share a few new insights and give some sparks of inspiration to fellow explorers. This will combine a bit of story from a high dose trip (20 hits 0.o) and following low dose 2 hit trip, and then some afterthoughts and realizations. I remember the last time I was here there was still a debate on whether these were spiritual tools, and now I know all too well that these are absolutely tools for connecting to a higher reality. The power of these tools and who should handle them is a different question though. I'll break it up in to parts for you, try to give the shortest trip reports I can give with highlighting the interesting stuff. Then Ill talk a little at the end on some of the insights. Lets explore.


Part 1: The Big Kahuna
Now I was with a friend who I will call Bob, and we both took this extremely large dose of 20 hits (please do not attempt). Within 2 mins I could already feel the effects, and within 15 - 20 mins I was fully submerged. I was looking over to my friend bob, it was not hitting him yet. I sat back as reality started to loosen up. I started getting surges of energy, shaking my body, I remembered Terrence Mckenna talking about certain psychedelics having certain resonance patterns which act as superconductors within the body. My body was fully charged, in circuit, each of neurons exploding with energy. I closed my eyes, I saw eyes everywhere, and pyramids, and all sorts of symbols, alien hieroglyphics, and religious symbols.

The main part of the experience was within the hour or two, which I call Diamond Buddha Land. I put my legs up and crossed them, got into some trance, and my third eye was in full function. I could literally feel this vision emanating off my forehead, pineal gland/third eye was fully active. Now visuals tend to build off each other, I've studied the mechanism, wave + breathing = wave breathing, square + circle = squarecircle you brain builds of what it knows. For awhile it will act with words or concepts, but at some point you have to leave that just let evolve this+that=this/that. It just becomes visual concepts rather than verbalized concepts. Anyway I was building and building and building until my consciousness was thousands of years in the future.. My friends wooden coffee table, was turned to red and gold, with cosmic ornaments, levitating holographic legs holding it up. There were diamond buddhas in platinum walls which were morphing into the sides of great temples, with inscriptions of all sorts of religions, some of this world some not of this world. There were all sorts of cosmic hyper-dimensional objects complexifying within the room. Not only that, but I was ringing with "diamond ring", a great tuning fork, my soul was ringing! I realized that by not giving into awe, and not trying to explain it to bob and just letting it ride, it would grow and grow and grow. Only after could I explain it too Bob. I started seeing soo much I started getting scarred though, I felt like I had saw too much, like I was revealing the universe to myself before it was time to do so. Like this wasn't the right way to be doing this. So I jumped out of the trance.

This all happened so quick Bob was still asking me if I was feeling anything yet. I was thinking what the hell is wrong with Bob, how is he not in buddha land with me , this lead me to believe that it wasn't just the acid giving this trip but my own spiritual advancement which helped in the great vision. I will get more into that later tho. I started to tell Bob, they are here, no more doubting, no more questioning, there was some intelligence interacting with us through this experience and we need not doubt its presence anymore. But he was only listening to me intellectually, but he was just hanging on my words, but listening to what they were pointing to. I told him to look at his own hands, to just look! Then I said die Bob, Die! Something cracked in him at that moment, but it took a min to kick in, he went to go smoke a cigarette.

The Proof: Real Connections
Here is where it gets pretty real. While is Bob is smoking the cigarette I am still ringing like a diamond, and I feel as I am ringing that I am tuning myself into some cosmic religion that whoever in the whole universe is tuning into the sound is a part of. So I was connecting with other humans, as well as aliens, as well as gods. There were so many layers to it, animal, human, alien, soul, and more than that and they kept changing and aligning and integrating. And I put my finger up, as I was channeling all this information in, and I was channeling a huge amount of information and energy, and I am ringing. Then all of sudden Bob comes down stairs and says what is that sound are you making that sound. He sits down next to me, and says be quiet, and for a few minutes we both sit and tune in on the frequencies.. Bob told me he could here me ringing from upstairs, he said it felt like he was stealing my wifi. And all of sudden he heard AUM, and then connection between that and the word of god connected in his head, and bunch of other stuff connected in his head, and that he had now awakened to God.

From there on out we were in cosmic complexity. White light and super complex visual phenomena happening before our eyes. Crystal castles with ornaments from the heavens as part of there structure. Then another really interesting factor was what I like to call the well of eternity. At points I felt like we were in a timeless realm, and these giant mountain like walls would come up beside us. Then I would speak and it would echo. And if spoke in a certain way within the well would it echo. And his room does not normally echo, we could not figure out from where this echo came from, yet it was there, and we were both able to collectively hear it. This was another beautiful factor.

The come down was okay Bob and harsh for me. My body did not do well as it traveled back into the realms of matter, there was lots of purifying to be done, lots of pucking. There is other little bits I could add that were exciting, but this is already longer than it should be.

Part 2: Two is still too much
So about a month later I decide to take a 2 hit trip. It was the day of the Lord Rama. Now whether you believe in hindu gods or not whenever these special days occur, the energy of the trip is always tenfold, or at least some means higher than usual. Not only that, but life works of vibrations, the 20 hit trip showed me that better than ever, and the names of these gods, the sounds of these gods, are very powerful. Now I was just going to go to the bar and enjoy some music, but I could not make it out the house. The energy was too intense. Within the first part of the trip I was cosmic playhouse. I felt as if I were channeling some higher being in, my environment became a cross dimensional cosmic space lounge, in which I was organic a part of. At the same time many different thoughts on the nature of reality were all be downloaded in. After being in this state for awhile I finally come down some. My hair is mess and I feel like just had sex. Hmm galactic space sex, how many beings have I been with, am I a space pimp? *puts sun glasses on*

Later in the trip I go up the bathroom. In the mirror I started seeing different future probabilities, I see my aura, with all sorts of digital code going through it, my head turns into an alien, and I throw up a peace sign. I start chanting Rama Rama, all of sudden the energy changes, I start expanding. I start seeing very light images of doves hold up beautiful things in my heart. Everything starts to go white, but then all of sudden I get that feeling like I am seeing too much again. Suddenly I start seeing pentagrams, and the goat head, I start to feel like I've something wrong is happening, like I wasn't supposed to see this. I can see visions of ramas form, go in between this devilish form, I get the feeling its not rama, but me who is doing something wrong. I feel like if I keep expanding I am going to go into some ineffable realm which will change my life. I went a little further, but I felt unready for the event, I caught one last visionary clip of Jesus and a Rosetta stone type thing with alien to earth language, and then I dropped the trance. I stripped down to my boxers and ran out the room.

I was so freaked out from the event. Never had I seemed something which seemed really evil from lsd. I didn't know what exactly happened, and I knew there was no one really to talk to give a solid answer. But I felt like I needed to say something, my mom came into my room and started to ask her questions. I asked if she thought I was a good person, and I told her about the light and how I saw too much. She seemed to comfort me, as if she knew what to say just because the fact that she was a mom. And it made me feel much better.

Later within the night I ended up looking at this little crystal shiva lingam I have. I kept seeing pentagrams a lot, but I thought maybe it was my own fear creating them, so I tried to look past it. As I stared into the lingam I began to connect with its holy vibrations instantly. I saw symbol which looked almost like an aum symbol mixed with a wu tang symbol on its side. Then I was in the realm of the god of time, I was seeing cycles of time for different universes, and I was this multi-armed being and in each arm there was chip, which was a different quantum of time. And this was showing me that tuning with these different times frequencies gives you different time lines and you could learn the art of mastering time. Then as it was showing me this sphere, was like a crystal ball in which I could see into reality, but there was a vision of sphere within a sphere, within a sphere, and then were all creating more complex reality though this time, and what was happening in my peripherals was so out of this world and happening so fast, it was not of this time or dimension at all. This was one of the most amazing fascinating states ever. I was super sensitive to the vibrations, everything is this reality works with vibrations, and tuning into these different fields.

After Thoughts:
Later in the night after the second trip I was listening to the guru I have been following who initiated me into all these vibrations, he said when you say the name of these gods without proper purification you are saying there name in vain, that these energies are so strong our limited consciousness may not know how to handle them. (oh were they strong) I hoping this explains the reason for the fear and the devilish vision and hopefully it can be purified and not turn into something worse. Because of this I am almost second guessing psychedelics now, they have always seemed inherently good to me, but who knows what powers dwell beneath the surface. I will take more care and precaution in my future psychedelics from now on. From an athiest point of view it would seem any fear is just your own on a trip, but after diving deeper into these realms, it seems that this is a being in with itself, who full identity is still unknown.

I was watching a video after the large trip where Yogi master was saying how Shamanism is very ancient technology, even T. Mckenna said to bring back the ancient model of Shamanism, and this technology will bring you to a very high state, but it won't bring you to the highest state. That you need to be a Yog to travel to the highest state. Shamanism gets you to savikalpa samadhi and lower states of nirvikalpa samadhi, but it won't bring you to the nirbig samadhi where you no longer descend into the lower planes. And everyone knows you can never keep the states you obtain with the psychedelics, you always fall from grace. So in order to evolve, you must do it within the system, only a yogic master can keep these states.. So basically this is saying these are technologies, and they have to use up to certain limit of function. But the thing is he is not denying shamanism, shamanism works up to certain point, its not the end all, but it does work.

Now going back to that one point of Bob being not being able to trip as hard even though we both took 20 hits. Its all your own vibrations, you have you own levels of vibration within you, and depending on your own level of accessibility on a normal basis determines how far you can go into the trip. Bob wants to do 30 hits now, because he still doesn't think hes found what hes looking for. As for me, my 2 hit trip was almost as much as my 20 hit trip, because of the awareness of vibrations and energies. You are opening yourself up, its all in you already though, you just have to get to it. The power of these divine mantras is real. The power of your consciousness is real. There are realms beyond this one waiting to be explored. Careful though, go in with the right intentions, this is real life your playing with.

I hope you can get something from this. Realize these divine experiences are possible. And its only a matter of attuning your self to these opportunities of life and let them unfold.

 

The collective ring you shared with Bob sounds fascinating.

The content of your doses sounds fascinating, I like many of the descriptive images you wrote about. It's good that you found a guru to help you direct these trips, whether it was the 20 hit trip, the guru or a mix of them which influenced your 2 hit trip, it sounds like pretty intense stuff.

 

Sweet report.


A little note, as far as I'm concerned, a yogic master still had to cultivate himself to reach those states of "mastery". Following the theme of being open to things, why not?

Also, I've been recognising certain words and patterns to hold more "significance"(for lack of a better word) than others. I'm referring to the names of gods you mentioned. Some symbols seem to be more intuitive than representative, like little pockets of condensed "reality"(again, for lack of a better word.. "reality", it's so cliché ). It's a principle found in poetry, some words that mean more or less the same thing are better suited in a certain context to convey a particular feeling.
The only example I can currently think of is "fluid", which to me invokes a longer, sweeping elegant form vs. "watery", which is stuttery. Describes more of a trickle.

Geometry gets me hard for that same reason, shape and form hold a unique ability to powerfully focus attention. As an art form, the viewer has so little control because the subconscious is magnetised to the described focal point, the conscious attention just follows in its wake. Fascinating stuff.


Earth question: How did you find reintegration into consensus reality after the big kahuna?

 

^Interesting point Nephila. Symbols defiantly play a key role in how our reality/consciousness works.

As far as the come down from the big kahuna, it was a pretty difficult one. I got very sick from not eating all day, and when I tried to eat everything felt so try. I laid on the floor in pain a lot, and I kept seeing negative images. I also felt sort of a purging sensation, in which I started puking, and felt like I was puking up negative emotions. At one point I was screaming at Bob telling him to let me go home, but he took my car keys and wouldn't let me drive. Basically it was like riding off a super intense hangover while slowly losing you visuals and regaining sober thoughts. I still had pretty fluid visuals until I feel asleep though. Got only a few hours of sleep, when I woke up I was okay, just a little tired, visuals were gone except for the afterglow.

Taking that much is a little much on the system. I fasted before hand, but when taking that large of doses I would defiantly recommend eating a healthy meal and having plenty of water before hand, you are going to need the energy!