I Need Some Advice

Discussion in 'Love and Sex' started by Universal_Donor, Jan 9, 2005.

  1. Ok. I have been single my whole life. I've never had a real boyfriend. I have kissed guys, but haven't done anything else with them, I'm still a virgin. I'm 18 and I'm in my first semester of college. I always did really well in school, kind of nerdy I guess but I was never "un-popular" if you want to place labels. I was always accepting of people, and was voted most outgoing when I graduated and was even prom queen (I'm not the stereotypical prom queen type.) Basically my point is this: I'm sick of being alone. I feel awkward talking about sex with people, and I have a hard time picturing myself having sex, like I feel really unattractive, even though I'm not. I mean I'm not wicked skinny, like I don't have a perfect body, but I'm not really fat. I have a lot of guy friends, but when I'm around guys I feel like they are always flirting with everyone else so much more, and I just feel really shitty sometimes. I don't know what to do to open up and gain more self-confidence. I need to get some ass..lol, but I don't want it to be with just anyone, I mean it doesn't have to be cheesy movie special or anything, but at least someone I care about. And not when I'm high or drunk for the first time I've decided. But anyways, what should I do?
     
  2. DarkStar

    DarkStar Member

    Please, to woever you pray to, listen to me. Be yourself. If it feekls comrtable, do it . Will you eventully get taken advantage of? Prolly. But if your .... fuck it.... i cant type now.....Be careful, go with your feelings, dont expect them not to be taken advantage of now and again, Just by this post, i wanna hug yu and tell you time will give answers to these qustions.
     
  3. _see_

    _see_ Member

    wooooo doggy do I kno what your sayin!!! but i tell ya it aint impossible.....and its best ya keep ya guy friends as friends ya kno;) there r loads of gr8 guys out there ready 2 love ya...but ya gotta have confidence....and smiles go a looooooong way!!! i mean i found a great guy (even tho i cant have him cos hes like 2 old 4 me lol!) while i was out shoppin.....it sounds dumb but he was there with a few ppl workin 4 sum charity gettin folks 2 donate money n we just started chattin n really hit it off...surprisngly we found we were into the same music n stuff he told bout his band and we just clicked...so i guess wht im tryin 2 say is keep ya head up ya lovely thing, smile like ALL the time and NEVER i repeat NEVER be afraid 2 go after what ya want...if it dont work out...go after sumthin else cos theres always sum1 out there
     
  4. Thanks that's good advice
     
  5. anok4uok

    anok4uok Member

    oh look, i found a female version of me
     
  6. anok4uok

    anok4uok Member

    sex is on my mind almost 24/7, and i'm really not caring anymore if i do it my first time and it being just a fling with someone, seriously, not having sex is like, making me feel like i'm turning into a pervert, i got porno mags up the ass, a few videos, and shit loads of pictures and videos on my computer, i spend hours upon hours looking at porn and masturbating and saving pics. and yea i'm tired of it, i want to experience sex. and also, at the same time, a relationship has been sounding really really good for a couple of years now, i don't think i can live single my whole life, if i get up in my 40s and i'm still single, fuck it, i'm pulling the trigger on myself. i've only had one, and it lasted 4 months, and i intentionally fucked it up by not talking to the person anymore (well for that time being), and mainly the whole cause of me doing this was out of my jeleousy. insanely stupid, when i look back on myself.
     
  7. Ya, I totally understand. I feel like I'm constantly thinking about sex, and it doesn't help that it's constantly being talked about around me. Whether it's friends or TV it's everywhere reminding me that I'm lonely, and it sucks. And I swear my mom thinks I'm a lesbian, not that there's anything wrong with that, I'm just not one, but because I haven't really had any relationships she thinks I'm like anti-guys when really, I'm just mad shy when it comes to relationships. It's weird because I'm generally not really a shy person, which was what I was getting at with the whole voted most outgoing and crap like that, I'm just not sexually open. I'm like asexual around guys, I feel like an old woman or something...
     
  8. sooty_the_kat

    sooty_the_kat Senior Member

    its funny when you are thinking about something it suddenly feels like everyone is always talking about it although i would say sex is mentioned a lot everywhere. once i freaked out (stupidly) that i was pregnant and it felt like every conversation people were talking about babies and it was on tv and everything, luckily i wasnt.

    anyway look, being in a relationship is nice but there is a lot of shit attatched like heartbreak crying fights etc and sex isnt everything, and when you obsess over things like that trust me people can tell. sex can be really empty and horrible if you're doing it just for the sake of it. there is a lot more freedom with being single, i know you're obviously sick of it but if you are confident and happy with yourself and your aloneness that is when people will start to notice you and want to go out with you. there are lots of people your age and older who are still a virgin, its not the end of the world. sometimes it takes a while to find the right person. there are other ways to make yourself happy
     
  9. anok4uok

    anok4uok Member

    and this is why i go on this forum, because there is no other place that doesn't feel tabu to talk about sex this openly, i thank this Love and Sex forum for being here, so i can vent my feelings.
     
  10. Crystaleyez

    Crystaleyez Member

    Yeah make sure and smile alot and giggle too. Whatever you do make sure that you don't undermine mens intelligence. Oh and a lil lipstick never hurt :p

    jk
     
  11. velvet

    velvet Banned

    I think I'd scare guys off if I would use make-up.. hehhe.. I've never worn anything else but mascara (for eye lashes) in public and the mascara thingie I have is at least 8 years old.. hehe.. I'd look like hobo the clown if I'd try I think.. :D

    Never had problems in the 'getting attention' department although I don't think I'm really special or anything.. I'm actually pretty flatchested and stuff.. but just be nice, friendly, outgoing and if that doesn't work throw in some mystery.. hehe.. and dare to be blunt and flirtatious.. what's the worst that could happen really? They can say 'no' or laugh and point.. but that's not gonna kill you.. it makes great stories for later in your life actually ;)
     
  12. browneydgrl

    browneydgrl Member

    universal_donor, i was a lot like you out of high school (into school, not much into hookups because i didnt really like anyne), and going into my first year or college, i was still a virgin. But the first month at school a met this incredible guy that i have been dating now for almost a year and a half, and i am so glad i didnt just give my V-card away for the hell of it. Maybe i just got lucky, but its still my opinion that hooking up with just anyone because you feel pressure to lose your virginity not fair to you. You seem like a smart, outgoing girl, so take it easy...something will come along
     
  13. I'm single, 17, and never kissed a boy in my life or had a bf....
     

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