:( i NEED a bf. or maybe just a cuddlebuddy.

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by snelio37, Jan 13, 2005.

  1. snelio37

    snelio37 Member

    i need a boyfriend so bad. i'm such a physical persona nd i can't excercise htat. there are no decent hippie guys who aren't taken already, or completely oblivious to my existence and it's fucking pissing me off. i don't know waht to do. i'm kind of shy around people i don't know, but otherwise i'm quite outrageous, but it's still hard for me to approach new people ( especially hot hot guys). what do i do?
     
  2. Carlfloydfan

    Carlfloydfan Travel lover

    Just get out and talk, eventually you'll meet someone. At least your not from Maine like I am.
     
  3. superNova

    superNova Member

    don't ever sell yourself so short that you believe you NEED a boyfriend.

    you don't need one. maybe you want one, for the physical attention. but you don't need one. explore your own life and recognize your own potential. until you realize you're fine on your own, a boyfriend will probably just keep you from doing the things you need to do for yourself.

    love yourself! :) when it's the right time, you'll have a boyfriend. but until then, enjoy your life for what it is :)
     
  4. headymoechick

    headymoechick I have no idea

    I wanted to say that but I couldn't think of a way to say it without being a little offensive. you don't need a man to live life to the fullest!
     
  5. superNova

    superNova Member

    haha i guess i don't worry about sounding offensive, i just always sound abruptly honest ;)
     
  6. Professor Jumbo

    Professor Jumbo Mr. Smarty Pants

    All of these people are right you know, you don't need a man. However, we do all need some cuddling now and then. That's all I have really, I've got no clue as to how you should go about finding a boy friend or a cuddlebuddy.
     
  7. meishka

    meishka Grease Munky

    boy freind/ cuddle buddy for hire.
     
  8. snelio37

    snelio37 Member

    ^ that made me smile

    and you guys are right, i don't need one, but i just think it would be fun to have someone to...mess around with, you know?
     
  9. divinessence9

    divinessence9 Member

    Well people that say u dont are usually people who already have someone so really they arnt thinking logically when they make such statements.

    Someone to mess around with? Humm what do u mean by that?

    Im not taken but i havent seen a pic of u yet can u send me a pic or the address to your homepage?

    Where are u from as well?
     
  10. superNova

    superNova Member

    nope ^^ , i am not dating anyone currently, by my own choice, because of the fact that i'm not going to date someone just to date someone. being happy and in tune with yourself is much more important than having a boy/girlfriend. if you can't be happy when you're alone, then you won't be happy when you're with someone.
     
  11. snelio37

    snelio37 Member

    its really hard trying to explain my motivations. mess around=perform mischief of all varieties. i don't really know. i'm only a freshman, thus making me ridiculous-sounding, but idk. it was more of an " im really wierd i need help with social skills" type of a post rather than a " please tell me how no one can love me if i don't love myself" message.

    so,to the issue at hand: while i see like a million "hip types" around, i don't know any of them. i need to find buddies near chicago. NW subs anyone? i re-evaluated and i guess i want friends that are a little more ( i hate using this term) like minded. not so uptight, maybe a little more...kind. people i can be myself around and not get dirty looks and rolled eyes. know what i mean now?
     
  12. Stalker

    Stalker Member

    Supernova has the point but about feelings ( especially love ) you can never be sure about anything i mean something could be unexplainable..
     
  13. JohnnyATL

    JohnnyATL Banned

    its because your 4
     
  14. cutelildeadbear

    cutelildeadbear Hip Forums Gym Rat

    You are going to think I'm a total bitch for saying this but I cannot help buy state my feelings. First of all, you don't deserve a boyfriend if you think that you NEED a boyfriend. Because first you must love yourself before you can begin a relationship with anyone else, and it would seem to me that you do not love yourself enough to know that eventually someone who is right for you will come along. I really suggest working on that. I mean if sex is all you are after I suggest experimentation, with toys, and yourself. But if you are talking about love, that is completely different. We all need love in different ways. As long as we are healthy ourselves there is nothing wrong with seeking out other healthy relationships. It is just when you suggest that you NEED something, is when I think that it is unhealthy.

    Otherwise, you should also not limit yourself to what you describe as hippy guys. I got into this habit once, and almost missed out on the love of my life who has taught me so much and who I could not imagine living without. Maybe it is not meant to be that you are with someone who is exactly like you, but they must love you and you then if you remain together. My boyfriend is not the hippy type at all. He is a computer geek type who mountain bikes and has no idea about politics or the environment. He doesn't like sports as I do, he doesn't really have much in common with me at all. But had he or I given up at first meeting we would never have gotten to know each other and fall in love. So keep you mind open for all sorts of guys. I mean there is a guy I know that I can't comprehend why he is with the woman he is with but they obviously love each other, even if they are complete opposites. That is what makes a relationship.

    I hope that you find someone whom you can connect with and eventually learn to love and one who will love you. Take care of yourself. Everything else will fall into place one day.

    ~Jen
     
  15. superNova

    superNova Member

    omg i had so typed up a message with like the same things in it but then i was like "man i'm already being the negative nancy of this thread" so i erased it, i'm so glad you said it, because it's so incredibly true!!! :D
     
  16. snelio37

    snelio37 Member

    pwah. how many times needeth i correct myself? at least one more apparently. i like myself fine. really! my life is dull, i want social fun. these last few months have been really weird, i just got a lot of freedom that i don't even know what to do with. i had never really gone much of anywhere without my mom. she's finally given me some freedom and i kind of don't really know what to do with it. my friends are all a little too good to be much fun sometimes and i am the official black sheep of the group. none of them are up for ridiculous party games that involve the removal of clothes and consumption of food, drink, and inebriating materials. no, the wildest we get is the star performer section of cranium ( which is fun as hell, but c'mon people). so don't go tellin me i don't deserve to have fun becasue i don't love myself, because i do. love is so not on my mind, and neither is sex, really. real sex=no way. i'm 14 dammit!


    ooh, side note on the hippy guys- they're the only even kind of cute ones in this whole high schooll so...
    and i have nothing against computer geeks, jocks, emos whatever. if you rock you rock:)
     
  17. SkeeterVT

    SkeeterVT Member

    I don't mean to appear rude, but you first need to make a correction in your HipForum profile. It lists your date of birth as being in the year 2000, making you only 4 years old. Anybody seeing that is going to gag in shock.

    Having said that, if you come across as "needy," no one will find you attractive. Neediness is a turn-off to most people. On the other hand, if you were to say, "I DESIRE a boyfriend," without giving off the impression that you're lonely -- emphasizing your positive attributes (spelling out what you desire in a boyfriend) -- you may have more positive results.

    Don't beat yourself up. Rather, stay positive.

    -- Skeeter
     
  18. Hikaru Zero

    Hikaru Zero Sylvan Paladin

    Hey, I'm a freshman too.

    But unfortunately, I mean college freshman,
    And Chicago is pretty far away from Rochester. =\

    SkeeterVT:

    So you're suggesting that not giving off the impression of loneliness yields more results?

    I knew I went wrong somewhere. (laughs)
     
  19. headymoechick

    headymoechick I have no idea

    your a high school freshman. Don't try and create drama in your life just because it's boring. Enjoy having no worries and being bored!! Value your friends that DON"T want to participate in parties where people are getting smashed and taking clothes off. You say you don't want sex, but you want to be where people are doing thes things? THink about what you're asking for putting yourself in a situation like this- you may not like what people expect from you. Wait until you're old enough to take care of yourself if you get in trouble to party like that.

    and if you're not going to take any of our advice into consideration and just defend yourself, don't ask. Jen's right. You don't deserve a boyfriend if you think you need one. And you know what? everywhere in life people are gonna be rolling their eyes at you. You need to work on self confidence. Learn not to care.
     
  20. snelio37

    snelio37 Member

    no. need is not the term i should have used. maybe enjoy. yes, " i would enjoy having a boyfriend" or " i would like to have a boyfriend. but need-meant to mean intense desire, not anything else .when i'm a senior in college, i'm sure i'll look back on this and wish life was as simple as it is but the grass is always greener right? and the advice i asked for is not the advice i'm getting. sure i come off as a lonely little teenager, but psh.

    there's a certain person who gets what i'm trying to say. it's just that general-allow me to be corny-not just being one of the beautiful people but being around them too. i'm not really shy, but..Thbbbh why do i bother trying to explain?
     

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