I might be gay or bi, but I'm going to go back into the "closet"

you are 20 years old.
go to college and do whatever the hell you want.
date men, date women..whatever.
you dont have to tell your parents anything.
when you are done college and get a job, and knowlonger require them finacially and you have your own place, than tell them.
they will accept you eventually, and by this point you will not be relying on them to live, therefore you can afford to wait while they get used to the fact that thier son is a homosexual or bisexual.

 

I know you don't.

I'm saying that most of the gays are like that, which is SAD for those like you who aren't.

Nothing quite like finding out you're HIV+ because your "boyfriend" had a meth problem and a group barebacking fetish he didn't tell you about, and basically didn't care about you enough to mention.

THAT would be my grave concern as a parent.

Not that I would think there was anything I could do about it, or anything.

If my son turns out to be gay I won't love him any less, but I will worry about him dating, simply because of the criminal callousness and lack of concern gays show for each other.

 

OK, so my chat-up technique needs a little work, big deal?

 

Most gays really aren't like that. The flamboyant ones that couldn't blend in with the rest of society and who make their sexuality their life might be. But who the fuck would date them?

 

And of course, the ones that AREN'T flamboyant and don't wear the badges find it hard to find each other....

 

What's it to you?

 

irongoth, your idea of gay men is kind of off..


don't always follow the stereotypes.

 

Oh gimme a break. Dude, I'm not some homophobe, most of my friends growing up were gay, and I think the annual parades are a hoot and kind of decry their new mission to be these family friendly and inoffensive affairs.

I also pay attention to gay issues for the abovementioned reason, and the rates of syphilis and AIDS are going up again. Seattle has a problem, a BIG one, inasmuch as they refuse to tell HIV+ men to STOP DOING OTHER PEOPLE without telling them they're infected and infectious, something about stigma, blame, fault, etc.

In the Big Boy world, it's called responsibility.

 

haha

I don't use drugs, nor do any of the guys I have met. The aids thing sucks, but it isn't only gay men.

 

Mush, I am NOT talking about you.

I remember two friends of mine being lectured in the 80s by some older gay dude about this new disease, how he had it, how it's DECIMATED his friends, and for GOD'S SAKE LOOK AFTER YOURSELVES HERE'S HOW.

- Don't screw around with anything that moves
- Use barrier methods

He emphasised I being straight should also follow the same advice.

OK

Fast forward to 2005.

I'm reading a column by Dan Savage in the Seattle altera-gutter-press about the frustration with the organisations paid money by the city to curb AIDS. They spend the money on sex parties and the like, not telling people to knock off risky behaviours and to TELL PEOPLE their status, come what may. Apparently it's stigmatic, it's judgmental. Wrong.

And Dan decried the OVERALL IMPRESSION he gets that MOST gay men in his experience look at infecting someone else with AIDS as *shrug* sucks for him.

It's like the documentary on Africa I watched, HIV+ guys doing women left and right. "Why don't you stop?" "Well, I have the slim, why should I care what happens to other people?"

 

Yes, some people are sick.

But there are straight women and men who do the exact same thing....It's disgusting.

 

There are relatively few straight men who'd wear latex cowboy outfits on a float driving through a city, simulating buggery with someone else.

The gay community is markedly different. Yeah, we breeders have messed up people too, but they tend to be ostracised.

 

Why do I get the impression that you'll probably say that to everyone on here, and still assert that you're talking about the majority of gay guys? I think we're a fairly accurate cross-section.

 

SelfControl - listen, why the hell do you think that the alternative weekly presses in this country keep advertising about the dangers of crystal meth in the gay community, agony columns about "that bastard never said anything to me and his friends found out too late (e.g. after) about me and him" etc?

Cause they're isolated incidents?

The ad I'm looking at says ONE IN THREE gay meth addicts have AIDS.

 

If this were true homosexuality would be much more rampant, as humans would be trying to maximize their pleasure. Preferences seem to be hard-wired into the psyche from early on in life, influenced by one's environment to an extent. Homosexuals are either accidents of nature or perhaps they served an evolutionary function not yet understood.

 

There is, believe it or not, a world of difference between isolated incidents and the vast majority of people. That is to say, just because more than a few gay people do meth or fuck irresponsibly, doesn't mean that the majority of gay people do it. It really is far from being most people.

People aren't going to write into the papers to say "I am gay and I have no experience of meth and don't have AIDS", are they. That doesn't mean those people don't exist.

What the hell does that have to do with anything?

 

Okay so, if 33% of gay meth addicts have aids, and if I give the generous estimate that 3% of gay men are addicted to meth, then that is roughly 1% of the gay population as a whole. That is not "most" gays.

Far from downplaying the risks, I'm only pointing out that your statement that most gay men are diseased, orgy obsessed drug addicts is blatently false. I have even had anal sex, and if I ever do it will be either 1) with someone I love who has been tested or b) protected, aka safe sex.

 

Oh, so AIDS isn't a problem for gay folks then, it was just Ronald Reagan and co. making all this up.

 

Anarchist: there are taboos in place which curb homosexual behaviour. However, in the animal world, roughly 25% of all observed sex is homosexual. In human societies where there are no such taboos against homosexuality, as in ancient cultures like Greece or the Roman empire, homosexuality was indeed widespread among males.

 

Anytime you feel like saying "OK, so when I said "most gay guys", I was kinda exaggerating, my bad", you just let us know.