Okay so I've had the most emotional weekend ever in the world! yeah. One thing I'm not gonna talk about. The other thing I've posted already somewhere else. But those things are about other people. This is about me. When I was 15-16 I was in an emotionally abusive relationship, it literally damaged my life as I knew it. That life ended when the relationship did. Mostly because my whole entire family was there when the breaking point unfolded and they were very avid about dragging it all through the ground.(or however that phrase goes.) It was really really hard on me, so I ended up moving because I was always so paranoid that this guy was stalking me, 'cause he kinda was, and he was spreading rumors, he was dating my ex-best friend, he was calling me saying horrible things, and I was crawling, clinging to the ground through everyday and everything I just wanted to hide forever. So it took a VERY long time to get over it, not him, but the state that he put me in, and I never really got over it completely, I'm still ridiculously protective of myself and absolutely horrible at expressing my feelings to people, especially verbally, I guess that's why I need to write, but anyway I was always so afraid since I've been back in town that I would see him again, or his stepmom, or his friends or anyone involved. And a few months ago his family moved up the street from my aunt's house, his brothers are my cousin's best friends now! So we were at my cousin's birthday party and his stepmom showed up and everyone's talking to her, and I was hiding behind people, refusing to look that way, pretending I didn't know she was there, until we were leaving and I couldn't ignore her anymore. I thought I would die, but I smiled at her while passing and I thought I was safe, but she spoke to me, 'are you honey?' I gulped glancing at her then looking away, 'yes', how old are you she asked 'twenty' aww you're so tiny just like your mom, she said. I smiled and that was it, I thought she would say more, I thought I would have an anxiety attack and I didn't! I'm so proud of myself, I feel like if I can overcome that(b/c she was awfully rude to me while I was still in that relationship, not to mention the way it fell apart!) I can overcome anything, maybe even talk to someone about it someday, then I'll know that it can't affect me anymore. I mean that is the single biggest event in my life that totally set me back in years, it really damaged me and to get to this point, when I didn't think I'd be able to look in anyone's eyes again, anyone, talking to his stepmom is HUGE! Yay me! Yay to letting the past stay where it is, and letting all the residue fade away! I'm so ready to get rid of all the weird side effects, and lingering phobias and so on that came with that relationship! I'm so over it! Yes! Now I'm happy!