I engaged in CMNM roleplay with a cheshire policeman

I am a straight male, but have always been into police officers and find their uniforms and authority extremely sexy. I was looking online for a long time for a female police officer, but couldn't find any. I did try to find someone who would just dress up as a realistic police officer, but believe it or not realistic police officer uniforms are not allowed to be manufactured or distributed in the UK to the general public so my fetish can only be quenched by a real police officer. Real police officers are the only ones in the UK who have access to police uniforms and gear.

Anyway after a long time I managed to get contacted by a real police officer. They were not a woman, but a man. His name is Charles and he is a Cheshire Police Officer. He told me he'd wear his uniform at all times and strip search me. We'd do a bit or a roleplay and he'd grope me and make me cum. It sounded good and after so long of searching i decided not to waste any time and meet him.

The idea of him wearing his uniform to touch me was really exciting so we arranged to meetup. He actually wore his uniform to the hotel room, knocked on the door and i let him in. He introduced himself as "Officer ******" and told me he had a warrant to search the premises. It was really sexy because he got so into the roleplay and the fact he was a real officer meant he knew exactly what to say and how to say it. It just all felt so real!

After he searched me, then strip searched me he told me I had a weapon that needed disarming. He put on some blue nitrile gloves and gave me a dry handjob. You'd assume a gloved handjob without lube wouldn't be so great, but it turned out to be the handjob of my life. I just lay there on the bed and let him grope me and man handle me till I came. Afterwards he got into bed with me and let me cuddle him and spoon him whilst he wore his uniform. He said he wants to fuck me next time we meet, but in all honestly I'm not into that idea. I don't think I'm actually gay I just liked the uniform. His penis being inside me doesn't interest me whatsoever so i doubt I'm going to meet him again no matter how good the first time was.

It was nice living out my fetish and having a real police officer. He wore a hivis police coat. He had a walkie talkie and you could hear police chatter through it throughout our roleplay and it turned me on even more. He also had a belt with handcuffs and even a taser. He did say he could use it on me but the lowest setting, but i got a bit too nervous lol and said maybe next time.

The reason I'm confessing this here is because to be honest I felt a bit dirty afterwards because there was no emotional connection between us. I kind of just felt like I used him to feel good and he used me to grope a naked young man. At the time it felt amazing, but the after feelings didn't make me feel great. I suppose I never would have let a middle aged man touch me in the first place if he wasn't wearing a police uniform. The excitement of getting a police officer after years of looking made me lower my standards I guess.