"I can't come into work today because..."

Today's a holiday.........it's Festivus day

 

I can't find my stapler

 

because my bike has a flat

 

I'm going over to farmout's and see if I can get in on a wilderness adventure in Alaska.

 

cant go to work today...........gotta check out the lawnmower races

 

The Swedish Bikini Team bus broke down in front of my house.

 

because I died and Im busy heading into the light

 

I'm waiting to see what kind of picture BBAD will put with his next post.

 

Im eating a helicopter

 

I've got to meet my maker.

 

because Im too tired after spending the night looking for OWB's maker

 

I've got to follow the yellow brick road.

 

Because I played soccer yesterday.....and was in the wrong place at the wrong time

 

I'm looking for the Pot of Gold at the end of the rainbow.

 

I had a bar-b-q accident............and I'm gonna have to hide for a while

 

I'm not working for the MAN anymore.

 

I am the Man

 

Because I have to pee......................................i have to pee some stones

 

I'm getting ready to fly south for the winter.

 

I smoked to much pot