We’ve been dating for about 7 months, we had great sex in the beginning had sex multiple times in a day. Now we live together and I’m just beyond turned off about 95% of the time. I think it’s because of stress from school (nursing school is a bitch) but due to self isolation I’ve been home for weeks already with very little stress and I still don’t want to have sex with him. I’m so dry when we do, it just gets painful. With previous boyfriends I would soak the bed or squirt frequently. I just can’t do that now. We’re young both 25, I recently found his viagra rx so idk if that’s messing with me.
Sometimes you get all wrapped up in your work or school, it happens - but don't lose sight of what is important. Yes, you're stressed - but think of how much better you'd feed after a few nice strong orgasms. You're dry, it happens - ask him to go down on you or and buy some lube. You can't cum? Take your vibe to bed with you and use it along with him. Don't give up on it. Your man has needs and soon with no sex he is going to get resentful and might just end up looking for it elsewhere. What's up with the viagra? I'd talk that one out. Maybe he thinks you can't cum so he has to be harder longer for you - maybe that's what's drying you out.
You aren’t wrong, I’ve even brought to his attention that I feel like his needs aren’t taken care of and I blame myself. We have tried lube (bought supposedly the best according to amazon) but it still irritates me when I’m super dry. I just want to do more for him in the bed but I’m upset that I can’t perform for him.
Well, maybe you have something else going on, being irritated. Might be worth looking into. In the mean time, switch to oral mode. I'm sure he'd love to have a blowjob regularly and trust me, that is a need taken care of. Plus you'd enjoy the connection with him, have fun with it . Try 69ing or using a vibe while blowing him. If you don't feel like doing it, just do it, it only takes a few minutes and it will make your man happy. Also, I'm sure that he's frustrated that he can't get you off, too, and it's his fault maybe....
I think your find it has something to do with commitment. its taken the edge off your feelings big time perhaps its best get apart so it will liven up your love life like it was, if that does not work I think you need a new man and a friendly split would be best for both of you.
Are you in the relationship for the right reason? Both of you need to be honest with yourselves. You're both young, you've only been together for 7 months, it's still a new relationship and you don't turn each other on anymore. Perhaps you are not growing together. 7 months is not a lot of time to lose on a relationship. If the relationship is not right, don't make it 7 years.
As much as you can get in your head about the interactions having a conversation with your partner is the first step to finding a solution to this problem. Trust me when I say I have also struggled with boyfriends not 'satisfying' me, and frankly I never reached climax until my now fiancé. We had a conversation about what each other likes, our current stressors and how it might be affecting our libido. This lead to easier sexual interactions and an emotional bond when we found we were both dealing with the same problem. The good thing is you and your partner still love each other and want to have the best sexual interactions. I would encourage you to start by talking to your partner about the mind game you have been playing with yourself, ask him about where he is at, and start from square one. Find out what you would want to try different, communicate that and just have fun with it. Sex isn't supposed to be stressful which can be even more stressful to think about when it is. So talk it out. Another suggestion I would make to you is LUBE UP. Even if it is something super simple like coconut oil, you are not broken if you need lube. It is there for a reason! If that can increase pleasure and make the sex easier and less stressful then use it! Overall, I would say just talk to him, just let him know how you are feeling and create that clarity that it sounds like both of you might need!
