I am going to kill myself.

Me thinks u missed the part where I said "Harvard study" etc.

But if not trusting of natural stuff, go the other way, is fine. Those who don't trust the meds may wish to go this way.

and the Harvard study was an accepted fact, published in "Psychology Today." Not exactly a new age, hippy, etc., magazine!

Go with what works for u, keep ur spirits and hope positive. When there's a will - theres a way. Dont lose ur will.

 

I guess i'm a little sceptical when it comes to studies being classified as fact. For every study saying one thing, there is usually another saying the opposite. Grain of salt.

 

I wish there was a way to clarify the important studies. I hear more about pop singers than important studies.

 

Most people don't give a stuff about science. Celebrities are more "interesting" I wish there was more substance.

 

When I am around alot of people, I am a private person; but in small groups or with one person I am not.

 

That's the truth for a lot of people mate

 

My cousin killed himself last summer, he was depressed, and probably felt in a simillar situation to you. The trouble is, no matter how alone you feel, the world is not simply the way you perceive it, there is so much more. Killing yourself would do far more harm than good. You might feel it's a release from your pain, and I do understand that, but it would bring so much more pain on so many other people. Suicide is selfish. It might not be weak, but it is selfish. Your family who love you, and all those who care about you, would be devastated, and scarred by it for the rest of their lives. You say you don't like music, so girls wouldn't be interested in you. Well I didn't like much music at 15, and I didn't even have a girlfriend till 16, now I'm really happy in love People mature at different ages, and what's true for you now may seem to be all there is, but it won't be that way for ever. You're 15, your entire world will change in just a few years. Kill yourself, and you deny yourself the chance to see how true that is, and you deny those who love you the chance of happiness for the rest of their lives....

 

I wrote that I didn't like music awhile ago, but I do like music; I may have been acting on an impulse. I play clarinet.

 

Yesterday I was 8 years old......today I am 57, please do not be in a hurry, life is fast. Tell your mind to shut up and tell your body to chill. Around the corner there may be what you need, everything can change to make you smile (or ruin your life and other, in a second. I just left a job. After that and after 3 years solid of similar feelings, from what you said, I laughed. I have not really laughed in years. So it was that simple move that changed my.....being down, I did not know that til a week ago. I do not know any answers, just what worked for me, this time. Don't drain your well as long as others may need water. You are ....YOU ARE in control. Stop those wackin yourself thoughts and take deep breaths slowly. Peace my friend. Post in 10 years and tell me if we helped. Besides its probably the fumes from the train in Durango, Colo. that has you .....different than you want to be. Sorry for the longish post.

 

I thought there were only 5 posters when I thought I would add a thought. There are 33 pages of folks who cared enough to write something. Pretty nice.

 

Christ people like you piss me off. You may have had a cousin who commited suicide but that doesn't mean you know how it feels to be depressed and want to do it. You can't give an opinion when you have no idea what you're talking about, only from looking on. It's in not selfish to want to stop your pain. Even if you keep your family happy, why should you live in misery. Plus, would your family really be happy if they knew how miserable you were? Don't you dare try and make someone feel guilty. You talk about the family being devastated but what about that person feeling devastated. Those who are ignorant should not judge.

 

Do you know anything about the situation I'm talking about either? No! So listen to your own words! I'm not going to be as shallow as you and tell you not to give an opinion on something you know nothing about, but don't tell me I have no right to speak on a subject I actually have a lot of experience with. People like you piss me off too, so close minded and insular, you believe the world revolves around you. When you cry it should rain, when you're sad it's dark. Wake up! I've got every sympathy for people who are going through hard times, and who are depressed. I've got a lot of friends in those situations. I've had family in that situation! But the world doesn't stop spinning because you're down. If you'd seen how my Aunt and Uncle were at the funeral, how my other cousins there were, then maybe you'd see the other side of the story....

 

Oh grow the fuck up. My grandfather commited suicide after 3 attempts. He shot himself in the head and it was witnessed. 3 close friends killed themselves so i know what it's like to the the family's pain, i was one of them. But i don't think it's selfish, i understand why they did it and feel better knowing that they are at peace. If you can't see that then bugger you. It isn't about you it's about them first, they are in more pain than you are mate. I meant you don't know as in you have never been depressed. Am i right? or not, please correct me if i am. I do not believe the world revolves around myself and i not close minded. Why am i, because i believe you can only truly know what depression feels like only if you have felt it yourself? Many would agree with that. It's like reading a book on the subject or experiencing it yourself. I'd rather get advice from someone who know's rather than read about it. Obviously the world doesn't stop spinning when someone is depressed you fool, what a silly thing to say. People who have suffered true depression are fully aware that the world is moving while their life is at a stand still. Gees!

 

You've got a lot of anger in you, you really should calm down a bit....

 

It's a touchy subject. I get fired up

 

I do agree with those of you who say that you can't know what it's like to be depressed until you've actually been there. I know what serious depression and suicidal thoughts are like; the BS that you get heaped on you by a lot of ignorant types that otherwise mean well, can actually make things worse.

What has helped the most, is honest sympathy and support, usually from someone else who's been there. It really can get lonely when you're all by yourself, and sad to say, the world really doesn't give a shit most of the time. What really bugs me the most, is all the "don't worry, be happy" types who drive me crazy with their plastic happiness.

In the end, you have to find your own solutions in life, and I don't knock anyone who chooses suicide. But then, perhaps all the pain in my life, both internal and external, has forced me to seek my own answers rather than adopt the ideas of others wholesale, and to learn real compassion rather than trying to sweep everything under the rug and pretend it's OK.

And to all the people who say that it's selfish to commit suicide, I have to ask: where were you when that someone needed a little bit of GENUINE kindness? I've actually diverted several other people from suicide, and not by preaching, but by just allowing myself to share in their pain until they can find the strength in themselves to go on.

So who's selfish anyway? You don't like being reminded of your own mis-placed emotional attachments, or your fear of death -- something that will happen to all of us, one way or another??? I stayed with my Father until he passed on due to Parkinson's. While I certainly miss him, I never felt any great sorrow, but rather gratitude that he didn't have to suffer anymore. I am also thankful for the chance to get to know him a little bit better; the last time that I got to talk with him was only a few hours before his death.

Sorry for the diatribe, but I just had to get this off my chest. Maybe if people could get out of their own heads and really give a rat's ass about supporting others for who they really are as people, most of the suicide problem (and a lot of others, like addictions, power trips, bigotries, etc.) would go away. Think about it -- it just might be possible!

Peace and love, everyone. And if you don't like it, tough, get used to it!

PS to Lizardman0: I know it's tough as hell, but I believe that just about every advanced soul has to experience something like this in at least one incarnation. And I do have the sense that you are much more advanced as a soul than even you know just yet, so hang in there if you can.

 

I'm sure it is for us both, we've both seen this kind of loss, and we've known people on both sides of the fence. I know the issue makes me angry too. We should be there for each other, not at each others' throats....

 

I generally agree with this. However, I do want to make people aware that they need to try less "cheer up" or "don't be weak", and more putting yourself into someone else's shoes. ESPECIALLY if your goal is to DIVERT someone from suicide... Remember that when someone is suicidal, they feel like no one understands them at all, and preaching only reinforces that sense of loneliness. Call this a bit of friendly consciousness-raising, if you like.

 

I didn't say I thought suicide was weak, I said I thought it was selfish. I guess those thoughts come from seeing how my Granny reacted when she heard the news, she was upset at first, and then angry. I wouldn't like to preach, only share my insights on it from the only perspective I can, how I've seen it. I suppose to say something is selfish is to imply that it is negative. I wouldn't use the term in that way. In a sense, if we're going to get into the philosophical, all acts are selfish, only some are less selfish than others, and a few hardly selfish at all. I don't believe there is an entirely selfless act - even to help someone, you derive some satisfaction from knowing that you've helped, even if that's not why you did it. I think suicide is selfish, because you do it for yourself, very rarely for anyone else. Even if you have considered how everyone else will feel about it, you are still acting for yourself. Selfish acts aren't always bad, sometimes you do just need to act for yourself, but I don't think that makes them any less selfish....

 

I appreciate your concern over having to deal with the aftermath of a suicide, and the resulting emotional trauma for the survivors. You have to remember though, that what I'm trying to do, is communicate a little about what's actually going through the mind of someone considering suicide.

I hate to tell you, telling someone who's contemplating suicide that they're "selfish" will do very little to prevent that suicide, it's likely to push them over the edge. When you're dealing with preventing a suicide, that's not the time to stake out moral positions. No matter what your personal feelings are, you have to reach out to the potential suicide WHERE THEY'RE AT, unless you want to have another statistic on your hands.

I know; I've actually contemplated suicide myself, and I've also successfully used the act of reaching out to prevent several other suicides. This is practice, not just theory. It's OK to talk about the horrible feelings of the survivors, but I'm trying to give you some tools to help prevent this from happening in the first place. None of us can bring back the past, but we CAN do something about the future.

Finally, remember that depression is an illness, not some "moral" failing or an act of "selfishness" or some sort of bad karma to pay off. I realize that it's almost impossible to understand if you've never been there, but the inner pain can get so bad that suicide can seem like the only reasonable solution.

I'm thinking about starting a new thread on this topic for those contemplating suicide; you might like to do the same for the survivors -- you do seem to have a good handle on that angle. Peace.