How to Smoke in Your Room and Not Get Caught -By: Koko The Smell The smell is the easiest way to give away that you're smoking. Because it lingers..like hell. Anyways, when you smoke, make sure that the doors in your room are closed, and locked. And make sure that you don't have anything open that would stop the fast circulation of the air...like closets, or doors or anything. You might want to roll up a towel and put it in the crack under the door to keep smell going through that way. If you have any vents that go throughtout the house, you can close them, cover them, or something. I never did anything with mine though. Anyways, you're going to want to make a spoof. A spoof is a toilet paper roll with some fabric softener (the little good-smelling sheets that you put with your clothes in the dryer). You blow the smoke through one end, and have it go through a bunch of dryer sheets, and then it comes out the other end smelling good. Take one of these sheets and put it over one of the ends of the roll. Next, stuff crumpled up fabric softener sheets down in there.. Put as many as you want.. You'll find a good amount after a little while of trying it. And you might want to cover the sides of the toilet paper roll with duct tape or electrical tape..I don't really like the feel of the cardboard. You blow the smoke through this when you're done hitting the pipe, and it comes out of the other end smelling like fabric softener. Now, you don't want the smell to linger, so turn on your fan as fast as it'll go to circulate all of the air throughout the room.. If you were to do the same after smoking a bowl without using a spoof, the smell would stay in the room and just circulate around and around..believe me, I know. The Noise Well the noise you make when coughing can be a dead giveaway..if you're parents hear you hacking up a lung they'll probably come to see if you're alright. Try not to cough if possible. If you need to cough, make sure you have the spoof over your mouth..it muffles the sound (it muffles the sound better when you have electrical tape coating the outsides, though). You can also cough into a towel or a pillow or something. The noise of the lighter (the little click sparking sound) can be really loud .. so you're going to want to use a candle. Light the candle with the lighter (this should be the only click sound you hear during the session). Keep the lit candle next to you while you're smoking.. when you want to relight the lighter, just press down the little button for the lighter gas, and it'll light. With no whooosh of the lighter! The 'Rents Make sure your 'rents are asleep or getting ready to go to bed before you do this.. it makes it a lot less stressful on yourself .. because you can usually do it without getting caught.. If they knock at the door, just say you're getting dressed or something.. and hide everything real quick (don't move much, they hear it if you walk across the room..so find somewhere within arms reach). For example, if you're at a computer desk, you might want to hide something behind the monitor..or next to the desk, or whatever. They probably won't see it when they come in. The Eyes Well to get rid of the red eyes, use Visine. Plain and simple. I've tried generic brands..but they didn't work. I had to use Refresh eyedrops for a while, and they sucked horribily. They didn't make my eyes any whiter, they just made them more glazed over.. And they hurt after a while. Don't use eyedrops if you don't have to..they're just uncomfortable About Me Well I have been smoking since August.. and I've never gotten caught or accused or anything. But on 4/20 I told my mom I smoke (we were having a discussion about how it was National Pot Day) and I came out and told her I smoked. She doesn't care now, so I can smoke without having to worry about the smell. However, I wanted to share my methods with the other less-fortunate people out there So I hope you like my tutorial.. feel free to post suggestions/comments/anything about it.