How to run an army...

I turned on the TV today and there was something on about how ants can make bridges out of themselves, and army ants don't have hives, they just make a house for the queen out of ant-walls wherever they go.

If I ran an army ant hive we'd leave the rain forest and go somewhere where no one would be ready and we could terrorize the public. And we'd bring our mushrooms, of course.

 

ants are wicked. they outnumber us by either a million or a billion to one (i forgot which--it's been 10 years since i learned that)!

plus rider ants own you; they'll kill an elephant (or you) in seconds.

 

Ants are like moving sprinkles.

 

I've waged war with Ants since i was very young due to their unlawful invasion of my garden in early 91'. Little red bastards. The death count comes to somewhere probably in the thousands for the ants casualities...and well, they haven't killed me yet but thats cause they're fucking worthless.

 

Please rephrase that.


There's an article about red bulldog ants in May's issue of National Geographic, and it says these little things (well...they're usually about an inch long) can spot intruders from two yards away and give chase, and the horrible pain from their bites can last for hours. Creepy. Luckily they reside in Australia, so I'm safe for now. If you can, check out the article. It has a cool picture of an ant in mid-leap/attack onto the photographers camera lens.

 

Ortho Home Defense my man! They have circled the house and are closing in. Its chemical warfare out there!

 

That's crazy! Imagine making a raft out of people, haha!

I like what you'd do with the ants, and you could even trade the leaf boats in for the mushrooms, they would prolly be more comfortable to sit on and we could get high at the same time. By the time we reached the public it would be game ova for em, mwah ha ha ha ha!

Shit! I told people I was bored last night

 

Yeah, ma Dad told me about that when I was younger. Apparently there was this man and he went to sleep in this jungle and these killer ants smothered his whole body while he was asleep and he was found the next day....well he wasn't found, just his boots apparently.... these ants had eaten him to death. I always thought he must be joking but now I think it might be true???

 

Boil the kettle!
Tie up those boots!
We're gunna hunt some ants!

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Them!

 

^^Nice!!!