Sorry if posted before but I'm a married man. My wife and I are both curious. She is mainly worried about taking the next step. She has 100% no issues seeing me with another male, but has no desire to see me with another female. I have no issues seeing her with either sex. Anyway, that's us. How do people go about meeting others? We have a family life and want to keep sex separate. We have doubts of trust, hygiene etc. Sounds weird but we were both high school sweethearts. Never been sexually active much with others. Please reply or feel free to pm. I will reply back.
Methinks before you worry about meeting others, the two of you have some stuff to work out and beginning with her having no desire to see you with another female, which isn't all that unusual but I've seen other couple get into this with stuff like this hanging out there and... it's not gone well for them. Having said that, there are sites and maybe apps out there for such like-minded couples to meet like-minded people and if you're not of a mind to use them, well, be of a mind to use them. You cannot have any doubts about this so, yeah, I think you two need to have a seriously long conversation about this and be very open and honest about why you want to do this.
If I may, one of the things my first wife and I learned when we went from just being open to having sex together and with other couples was to talk about how this was going to be a good thing for us to do instead of this being a "me" thing. What are we going to get out of this; how is this going to make us better together. It was like, okay, getting what we both wanted as individuals... but doing the things that would help us be better together. For instance, she had said that seeing me with another woman still bothered her and maybe it'd be better if I didn't get involved. I said, "How does that work? You get to have the sex you want and with who you want... and I don't?" We had to fix this and quickly; there can be no inequities in this unless they're planned as part of things, i.e., cuckolding, voyeurism, stuff like that. Don't do a thing until the two of you are really on the same page with this, okay?
I get what your saying. We spoke more last night. Voyeurism is a major interest for both of us. Cuckolding is huge for me. I'm very sub. We would love to either watch or experiment with another couple. A dominant male would be ideal. I'm an assertive person in real life, but love to be coerced/forced in sex. A dom couple would be heaven. But you can't have your xake and eat it.
Trust me - you can have your cake and eat it if you do things right so that everyone gets what they want. Just don't make the mistake I've seen a lot of people do: Create a bunch of rules that don't leave room for things to change or gets in the way of being able to have sex. Never stop talking about it with each other; it's so important to always know how everyone is feeling about what you're doing and what everyone is thinking; too many people talk about doing something like this and once they get started, they stop talking and, ultimately, wind up failing.
Back in the early years of our relationship we talked about swapping with a like minded couple our age. Put out feelers on line and got responses from 2 couples. Met the first couple for drinks. She was hot, he was a dud. The second couple was great. We got to know them over drinks. They were both attractive and bi! My wife and I are both curious (she knew I’d had the same suck buddy back in hs and college….she’d never been with a woman). Wife and I agreed no sex the first meeting. This was uncharted territory for us, but they were experienced. We felt that we all were interested. We wanted them both. Well on the drive home the wife tells me that she doesn’t think she could handle seeing me have sex with the wife, but had no problems seeing me with the husband, or me seeing my wife with both of them. Well sh*t! I never saw them again as much as I wanted to. But that didn’t stop my wife from accepting an invitation to this other couple’s home one evening (he worked nights and I was out of town). She had her first sex with this woman who seduced her. Wife called me late when she got home and gave me the Cliff Notes version, and more details when I returned home. I’d as her questions and more details….she’d blush when responding. I was all over her that night. Later I asked her if she wanted the both of us to have the husband? YES! The wife called a few times subsequent asking my wife for a repeat…….she declined! Sh*t again! My wife said it was different with a woman, pleasurable, but she’d scratched that off her bucket list and didn’t want to do it again. She could have at least let me watch her with the both of them, and wife watch me with him. So never saw them again. So we went a different route and into straight MFMs with a good buddy. They were ALL great! When we were alone after one such romp my wife suggested we look for a bi guy that could have us both. She saw the way I was looking at my buddy’s cock, but he was extremely straight so I didn’t do anything with him, although she did EVERYTHING with us. We looked online again and got several responses from bi guys, but unfortunately none of them appealed to us……older, overweight, hairy (which was a big turn off). I felt that second couple we met would have been perfect. If only my wife could have got past her insecurities and jealousy. As mentioned, communication is key. In a way I’m glad my told me about her apprehensions of seeing me with another woman. If she hadn’t and we had gone through with a swap, I don’t think our marriage would have ever been the same. A missed opportunity for the both of us. But a word of caution…….as exciting as the thought of seeing your wife with another is, once it happens your emotions will be all over the place. I was excited, insecure (he was REALLY good!), so aroused, jealous…… Just make sure you reclaim your wife after your 3rd has left. Probably the most intense passionate sex you two can have. PM me if you’d like.
Wow. Loved your reply. And i appreciate the advice. I did try and pm you but couldn't see where to do it. Sorry, new here. Hope to speak soon.
