How is the person above of you gonna die?

Like Don Juan, he burns from within.

 

will be attacked by a gross of rabbits, while trick-or-treating dressed as a giant carrot.

 

Falls into community composter and suffocates, is never found. Following year's tomatoes twice as big.

 

Will stop breathing shortly after the heart stops beating.

 

will be bludgeoned with hail when running out into a storm to take a much needed shower.

 

Beheaded in a jihad video

 

Will land and shatter into a zillion pieces, encased in a frozen cube of shit after being sucked through the toilet on a PAN-AM flight.

 

Disregards the warning on a dry cleaning bag which reads "NOT A TOY".

 

Fell on her ass... Pop goes the weasel!

 

will be shot by a rubberband gun and have a deadly hissy fit

 

will be killed (in self-defense) by the pope during a bungled assasination attempt on Christmas day.

 

will be killed by a zebra that was genetically mutated by increased radiation at the Keebler Elf Treehouse and fed growth-hormone cookies to make it into a giant killer zebra.

 

A big rock is going to fall on your head. Don't worry... you won't feel much.

 

One too many purple nurples.

 

Crushed under a wave of logic.

 

trying to find god

 

in an alien space craft when something goes terribly wrong with the annual probe insertion.

 

Getting years confused with asses in a deadly word game.

 

clip on tie stuck in his throat.

 

Trying to get his picture taken with a sasquatch. The camera will be recovered later but the picture will come out kind of blurry.