How do you get a guy into your bed??

It depends on what you want him to think of you. If you don't care at all what he thinks of you, and you just want his penis in your vagina, then you can basically just try and tell him that and go from there, as long as you don't mind him possibly thinking you are complete trash and just a cum dumpster. If you actually want to have something with this guy may I suggest a more nuanced approach where you get to know him and show interest in him outside the bedroom too.

 

and if all else fails... rope.

 

Well I sent him an email saying "I want to eat your cock". Too forward?

 

Thanks, I'll be over as soon as I'm done at work.

By the way, just for bragging rights I forwarded that email to all my buddies. Hope you don't mind, luv.

 

I dunno, I'm not good at this.

 

omg YES. that's too forward... does he even know your sexual attracted to him. How old are you??

 

bring ketchup

 

lol and she said "eat" instead of "suck"

 

I was just kind of joking around. I'm happily married, but if I were single and any of the ladies I work with sent me that note I would delete it then empty my deleted box so it's permanently gone then I'd go to her desk and ask her where she wants to get dinner tonight and give her explicit instructions not to wear any underwear. And if she's not a wack job the relationship might last a good long time.

 

Nah not at all, it's how I got my hubby to meet me in Canada

 

Lol. I thought "suck" sounded a tad boring. Maybe... "devour" or "Swallow" your cock sounds better?

The things I would do to that man's member... Oh my goodness.

 

Lets see, by putting "eat" into thesaurus.com we get;

absorb, attack, banquet, bite, bolt*, break bread, breakfast, chew, chow down, cram, devour, digest, dine, dispatch, dispose of, fall to, feast upon, feed, gobble up, gorge, gormandize, graze*, have a bite, have a meal, have for, ingest, inhale*, lunch, make pig of oneself, masticate, munch, nibble, nosh, partake of, peck at, pick, pig out, polish off, pork out, put away, ruminate, scarf, scoff, snack, sup, swallow, take food, take in, take nourishment, wolf

I think "inhale" is the best one. "I want to inhale your cock" just has a classy ring to it.

 

Dress well, be nice, appear interesting and interested, wink.

 

Forward? Tsk tsk. He's a man. He won't appreciate subtlety, for crying out loud.

Give the poor guy a chance. I've modified my advice earlier as follows.

1 Turn up naked at his house.

2 Bring beer, at least 2 hot female friends, a video camera, soft cheese and a variety of plastic toys.

Enjoy!

 

Maybe he'll find it hilarious. I would.

 

was that the entire message?

it's not too forward, although it does sound slightly threatening, like something a wife might say to her cheating husband...

 

Well, I think he's a bit stupid. ¬¬ I need something eye catching and unignorable cos he's not getting the subtle hints at all.

Plus, how do I find out if he has a girlfriend? :S Cos I don't wanna be like "Yeahhhhh I wanna fuck" and he's all "My gfs reading this message over my shoulder." Awkwaaard.

 

Eh. That sounds pretty sexy tbh. If I were a guy I'd get a hard on from that, and also assume she's a monster cocksucker. :devil:

 

no guy gets the subtle hints because 1) they're subtle, and 2) they're the exact same hints given out by teases and girls who just want a gay boy to latch onto.

i assumed you already knew he was available. if he didn't respond to your "eat your cock" email, he's probably either gay or taken. if you still must know, try stalking his facebook.

 

Subtle hint for a guy....

wear a long coat with nothing underneath, then when ya see him take it of.