Holding in farts

When you're in a situation where you can let er rip,or don't want to,how do you hold it in?

 

Squeeze my butt hole shut. Sometimes it doesn’t work.

 

swallow with stomach

 

If possible, I just excuse myself to the bathroom and do what I need to. No sense in being in discomfort.

 

If I'm at home, fart. If not hold if at all possible. If not possible, then bathroom. If not bathroom, sorry...

 

If I start letting them out then I just constantly fart all the time. It's like my butt thinks it has permission to constantly fart. So I hold it in a few times and then I don't fart anymore. If I'm around farters and they're a bad influence then I start letting it go and it gets completely out of control 'cause mine smell unnaturally bad.

 

I think we need the expert input of r0llinstoned here.

 

i'm not really sure that there's a "how." it's not like there's a constant gas leak unless you consciously plug it; when you feel like you have to fart, then you push it out and feel better.

sure, one does occasionally slip out unintentionally, but obviously in that case you didn't hold it in.

 

It's not possible.

But if you're sharing a bed and don't want to disturb your loved one, peel your butt cheeks apart, allowing the compressed air an easy escape from the A-hole. This method always ensures a silent, if not deadly fart.

 

My technique, if shopping or something,just let it out slowly and walk away and fan. If it stinks, start loudly saying, "Oh my gosh who farted..dang,what did they eat? That's disgusting" If it still lingers, continue walking aisles saying "Gee wiz!" Or "holy fuk!!!"

 

yeah, sure, blame it on someone else....lol
If I am farty one day, I will stay home.....no secrets here, and Stan always wins, anyway....lol


but out in the world.......i guess I am pretty good keeping things together until I can be in private...don't have much of a problem with that..or not as yet, anyway.

 

I have never really had an issue with gas. If the urge to break wind comes over me, I am usually able to hold it in until I can get somewhere where nobody is around.

 

i fart and walk

 

My brother said once someone farted in front of him while he was walking along the pavement, so he overtook them and then farted in front of them.

 

I run on laser beans

 

the worst are pissed men in urinals
they walk up next to you and let rip
and then ask how you're doing

not as well as i was like 10 seconds ago

 

Happy to not be male

 

Children are like farts

We relish our own but hate other people's