Heya. My name is Mia and im abit confused.lol

So hey there. first time for me.
my name is Mia and im 19 years old.
I have no idea where to start or what to say, I just need to speak som things off my chest, its getting heavy there

ive dated, i got sexual involved with men, i had a boyfriend, i did all that caus it seemed to be normal u know.
never understood why I didn't like sex at all, I always fake my orgasm and it just doesnt feel good lol. when i hear my friends talk about it theyre so excited. im not talkin from 1 men expirenece but few.

Well , ofcourse that didnt lead me to think i am lesbian. i just thought im weird at that time.
got used to it and kept on dating men.
Also, I had that really close friend , sometimes i was looking at her in a sexualy way and while shes speaking to me in my head im imagining my self kissing with her. again thinking - weird - in my head.

Im a bartnender, im working with so many cute girls. theres one girl that Im working with , don't know why but I cant stop staring at her, and she likes me too we got friends real quick and we hang out and all , she tells me boys-troubles and im always advising her. whats weird in the whole story is, I found my self sitting at home waiting for her to text me, when she does, Im getting over excited , when she doesnt - im startin to get nervous thinking something happend, i dont know, it shouldnt be that way DEFINITLEY. i think i love her. a real love. never felt that way with any boy ever.
there was that time we was workin and getting drunk together, she got real drunk and she came at me like she was going to kiss me. I pushed my face away cause i got realy nervous i knew shes just drunk although i realy wanted that deep down. but it felt even weirder to kiss her caus then that wudve confirmed that im a lesbian. I never had such a girl crash , but im lost. i dont know what to do. i have a boyfriend and I rather go out with that girl than him. i find myself going through her facebook and staring on her pictures. Shes totaly straight tho and i could never neveeeeer tell her how i feel.
my question is. am I lesbian. or what. why do i like her so much more than my own boyfriend. what should i do...what am I... please help me out here

 

I'm confused too. Dated a guy, sex with a guy but still confused! What to do?

 

OK Mia. Let's take this one stage at a time.

First, allowing one girl to kiss you on one occasion does NOT "prove" that you are a lesbian, any more than allowing one boy to kiss you on one occasion "proves" that you are straight.

Second, how can you be sure that your friend is "totally straight"? Is it because you've only ever known her go with boys? Well then ... maybe you appear to be totally straight for EXACTLY the same reason. So she might easily be in EXACTLY the same place you are.

Thirdly, many people your age - girls and boys - experiment with all aspects of sexuality before they finally find what place they occupy in the sexual continuum - and this includes trying some things that turn out not to be right for them. That is perfectly natural and normal. So don't be afraid of experimenting. If it turns out to be wrong, then accept it's wrong and learn from the experience. Just don't do anything that YOU are not comfortable with, merely to conform with your perception of what other people expect from you.

Fourthly, this is not something to be worked out when drunk. You both need to be sober, so you understand and accept what is going on.

Fifthly, good luck; and a BIG hug from me.

Becky