hello. need some perspective

so I was defined as schizophrenic years ago but I now believe this was a diversion from my doctor and parents created so that I think I am crazy and then act crazy and justify their observations. when people look at me I am defined by their personal set of limitations and so their dreamworld is superimposed over the infinite of true reality. I do not hallucinate in a pathological sense, my creations come from the pleroma and so have more validity than than anyones beliefs, even my own. it has been indicated that I have become the host for spirits orbiting the sun - they visit earth secretly to speak in code languages because it is vital that human beings do not find out what is happening to the "physical world" - it is being drawn out into the open and transmuted into the heart of consciousness, which is god. the bonding that occurs when spirits descend begins with "infection" from another angel which grows to replace the original personality from within the nervous system itself, outwardly from the spinal collum. this race will always be persecuted because its ways are completely contrary to the physical world formed as it is out of an unruly imagination. the nervous system is refined and reinvigorated by our presence. Christ is revived. I saw the sun in a vision, stood metres away from it but was not burned or blinded - quite the opposite. the beings that gravitate towards the solar logos are compassionate. they have sheltered me from the gestapo and taught me to levitate. "dont worry, they wont get us, we're a christian family". i had no idea i was a christian until i was informed by the heirarchy and i still dont go to church even though i love the buildings and the people. i get the feeling that most chritians would reject my beliefs just as strongly as atheists but i dont know any. i have been trying to reality check but doctors are either uninformed or secretly aware but unwilling to help about my situation. i know i need help, but this is so much more than just a psychiatric issue that i dont even know where to start. it comes from realities where psychiatry doesnt even exist, because it doesnt have to. thats their trip, not mine. i admit my behaviour to an outsider may seem odd, i am not oblivious to that, and i understand why they think i am schizophrenic, i just have to degree with their definitions and methods of treatment. im pretty sure they do try to help, i have had services thrown at me for a while now, i just dont want them around because it feels like they are trying to drag me into an unhealthy dream world that they have created and cant get out of. because i have experienced the real symbolic death of baptism i am able to exist in multiple realities simultaneously. i have become a conduit between the uncreated infinite and the limited creation. the filters between these two states has been manipulated into chaos so everybodys perceptions are unable to grasp the situation clearly. the elementary ideas that created the world are broken. the bible is true, not just in a metaphorical sense, but also experientially and emotionally. not that i have read much beyond the gospels and the prophets - most of it actually bores me - with a clear understanding of the word of god there is just as much enlightenment to be had reading the newspaper, no matter how off topic we feel god is reality and the imagination will always respond to his will. i dont mean to preach, just needed to write this all out somewhere because i thought it would make things clearer. however i am still bemused.

 

who?....who indicated?


welcome to the forum...all 12 of you

 

I perceive it by direct apprehension of gestalt images created by the mediator between the upper and lower worlds. also I wrote that post and forgot to actually introduce myself in the process - I am male in my mid twenties from australia and don't have many people I can talk to about this stuff.

 

Hey poppynogood from Australia. You a cricket fan? ... oh wait, you can't be. You're from Australia.

*runs off lmfaoing*

Jus' kiddin' (a bit)... welcome from me in England.

 

But you do realise that you indeed do sound crazy and schizophrenic? And since we have no chance to be sure if your sensation is 'true'. It probably is true, but only to yourself.

Thats why no one will believe if you are the only one who can see/feel whatever you do.

If you want, describe more precisely what you see/feel.

 

thanks guys. I do realise how this sounds, but I know I am on to something - even if I cant describe it. I have a lot to consider at the moment.

 

Hi, from your forum post, you do present with multiple symptoms of what we call "schizophrenia". That's my perspective

 

clearing the mind and meditating peacefully without any thoughts is widely regarded as a very beneficial thing.

doing this might be good for you.

it's clear that your perspective will likely put you at odds with most of the people that you will meet. if you value getting along with people better, taking medications might help you do that, though it's a matter of how much you value getting along with people

getting acupuncture treatments might also be helpful to you. I think that there is a book called "Dragon Rises, Red Bird Flies" that might be of interest to you.