growing shyness is it a bad thing? twice the shyness now

Discussion in 'Random Thoughts' started by pandapandapanda, Jun 26, 2013.

  1. My shyness gets the better of me. Due to it I can't approach people without an urge to run. Even If I know people like me I seem to get shy. Is it bad that I'm twice as shy now then ever? I can't talk on the phone very well with out stammering for words.
  2. r0llinstoned

    r0llinstoned Gute Nacht, süßer Prinz

    Shy people can be kinda cute. But if you can't talk on the phone without stammering you might need some help. Not a therapist or anything but self help
  3. I try hard but I think I've been told it was cute. I'm usually only less shy when one person is near me. In a crowd the worst thing I did was cry when people put the spot light on me. I can act on a stage but my real world social skills are really bad.
  4. Pressed_Rat

    Pressed_Rat Do you even lift, bruh?

    I have the same problem. And it's not so much being shy, but just being nervous around people and not really knowing what to say. Often the more you focus on being shy, the worse it gets. I also notice that cannabis has had a lot to do with making me shy over the years, because it makes you more self-conscious. I feel it is better to be a woman who is shy than a man who is shy.
  5. Well I hate shy. Typed words are easier for me. But spoken makes me scared. Usually only mad do I sum up the courage to talk.
  6. If it gets to the social anxiety level then you just treat it like any other anxiety- well, like a phobia and just force yourself to do things til it's second nature. or so they say.
  7. RainyDayHype

    RainyDayHype flower power Lifetime Supporter

    I can relate. I have bad anxiety and I'm socially awkward. I get nervous around a lot of people so I prefer to hang out with just one other person. I find it easier to express myself in writing rather than actually speaking. I can't stand talking on the phone, I very rarely talk on the phone.
    So you're asking if your shyness is a bad thing? I'm not sure..People have made me feel bad for acting awkward in social situations but I guess it helps that I honestly don't care what people think.. People that are extroverted and loud tend to mistake an introverts shyness for being rude..
  8. I will try but I will fail
  9. MeAgain

    MeAgain Dazed and Confused Staff Member Super Moderator

    Check this Wikipedia entry out.

    I used to be shy, I guess, but I tend to think of it as reserved, I was even called aloof once.

    I hate being the center of attention, especially in crowds or groups. Some of that is due to a fear of making an idiot of myself, and some is due to the fact that I don't think people should elevate themselves above others. As an example: when a football player scores a touchdown, I feel he should be thankful for the opportunity to display his talents and be humble. After all he couldn't have done it without the rest of the team, and the challenge of his opponents.

    So anyway shyness is penalized in today's society, which it should not be.

    So I still don't talk much in groups, as most of the talk is boring, (I guess that's why I'm aloof), but over the years I have learned that if you just ask people a simple question or two, you can stand back and nod your head a few times and they will talk forever about themselves and what interests them without you saying a word. And they will think that you are a great "listener" and conversationalist.
  10. Can you be my new best friend? Sorry. Like I said through written word I can be outgoing
  11. kokujin

    kokujin Senior Member

    i'd work on it. at any point I am capable of coming out of my shell completely and owning it, and I like that (about myself).
  12. Pressed_Rat

    Pressed_Rat Do you even lift, bruh?

    Would you be shy around me?
  13. RainyDayHype

    RainyDayHype flower power Lifetime Supporter

    no, probably not
    I like one on one company. It's more intimate (and I don't mean that sexually..hah). It's groups of people that overwhelm me.
  14. RainyDayHype

    RainyDayHype flower power Lifetime Supporter

    yes!!! :)
    I'm actually in california too.
  15. If I may ask socal or nocal?
  16. RainyDayHype

    RainyDayHype flower power Lifetime Supporter

    I'm in southern ca..
    I'd rather be in northern cali
    where are you?
  17. Socal. I am not happy here. I rather be in the nice cold area. Too hot in my apartment. And my pit bull is the only company I've had.
  18. RainyDayHype

    RainyDayHype flower power Lifetime Supporter

    Me too. I belong in seattle. I hang out with my cat all day.
  19. Pressed_Rat

    Pressed_Rat Do you even lift, bruh?

    Sounds like you guys would get along swimmingly.
  20. RainyDayHype

    RainyDayHype flower power Lifetime Supporter

    Wallflowers united.

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