Grandmother with Alzheimer's

After I graduated high school, I moved on to help my grandpa take care of my ailing grandma. She has Alzheimer's. She was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's a few years ago, and she is now 61. She has gotten so much worse, and it is fraying my nerves. It's not so much sad to me, as I've been able to accept what's happening and what will happen, but some of the things she does just annoy me so badly. Now I have an autism spectrum disorder, called aspergers syndrome, and people with this disorder are known to be somewhat angry in nature and easily irritable, especially by noises (i.e. my grandma makes loud, kind of smacking noises with her mouth when she opens it. It's gross), so that's one thing to keep in mind. But she is driving me crazy day in and day out. I'd move out, but I have limited funds, so that's not a viable option. Does anyone know anything that can help? I don't know how much longer I can keep this up.

I'll list some of what bothers me the most
-she's so touchy. Any time you get slightly miffed at her, or have a slight criticism, she decides to go and sulk for a while.
-she sleeps too much. That is, when we have things to get done, she always seems to have gotten bored, and gone to take a nap, and doesn't wake up till it's too late to get anything done.
-her spells where she is convinced that one of her warped realities is real (i.e. she thought my grandpa was cheating on her, which he'd never do)
-she gets up in the middle of the night because she didn't eat enough at dinner, or she needs a heartburn tum. It's annoying because it wakes us up

Some of the obvious solutions don't work, because I go to college and work, so I usually don't have the patience or energy to deal with her. This is starting to age me.

 

Maybe talk to the county Dept Of Family And Childrens Services.

There may be help you aren't getting.

 

Where would I find that? It's a good plan, I just need to know where I'd find these people to talk to.

 

Look on your county's government website.

 

She could probably benefit from a home health aide, I have no idea how much that costs though. I know its a lot less than putting her in a home and you can choose how many hours they come a week based on her needs. That would at least give you a break from the role as caretaker for a little while. They just do light housework, keep her company, drive her to appointments, etc

Do you have other family helping and has she appointed a power of attorney? Might be worth talking to them about, or to her if she still handles her own finances.

 

My grandfather (who is 64) is in charge of most of that. I'm mostly helping out, although I'm doing a lot more than I can really handle, hence all the problems I'm having with my grandma.

 

From your descriptions, she may also be suffering TIA incidents. Half an aspirin every day can help as an anticoagulant, but check with her doctor first, since it could be dangerous if she has any history of ulcers or weaknesses in her arterial system that could lead to aneurysm.
Dementia is often poorly investigated and simultaneous treatable medical conditions get missed along the way.
When you mention 'spells'. If her confusions happen suddenly and then get better, only to strike again a few days later, along with her thinking that she is living several years in the past, these are what lead me to strongly suspect TIA activity in her brain.

 

Transient ischaemic attack (TIA)

 

I don't know if I am allowed to post another website here but the Alzheimer's association has an active message board. It is: alzconnected.org

There is a message board and links to many articles about the assorted kinds of dementia. It is a wealth of information.

My only short advice is that your grandmother is not in control of her behavior but you can choose to have patience with her.

 

None of that sounds like Alzheimers

 

Because we know what it is, just no one wants to say it out loud

Rotting brain syndrome

 

Actually all of that and more can sound like Alzheimer's.

 

True, but my point was that once a patient has been diagnosed with dementia, doctors tend to miss other medical conditions. Breakdown of brain activity must have a root cause and their is a theory that TIA activity may even predate some forms of dementia.
Although you are no doubt aware that I am a design engineer. Breaks in work in the theater led to me working on life support equipment and I became very involved in cardiothoracic surgery. During this period, I concluded that their is something of a void between cardiology and neurology. Modern CT scanners help correct diagnosis, but very few dementia patients are given a full scan. My particular emphasis on TIA is because the problems are similar to those experienced in heart muscle degradation following TAVI procedures. (trans-catheter aortic valve implant)
Put simply. It is rather like driving a car with an engine problem and when performance gets worse, failing to notice that the car has a flat tyre.

 

I cant help with your me-ma...your a good man for hanging in a tough situation

however....if gramma is sick maybe you should start thinking about doing everything under the sun to make sure you don't get sick when you get that age

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The Effects of Medical Marijuana on Alzheimer’s Prevention
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The study, published in 2014, is among others to support the effectiveness of THC in prohibiting the growth of toxic amyloid plagues.

Co-author of the study, Neel Nabar, cautions against drawing quick conclusions from their study saying:

“It’s important to keep in mind that just because a drug may be effective doesn’t mean it can be safely used by anyone. However, these findings may lead to the development of related compounds that are safe, legal, and useful in the treatment of Alzheimer’s disease.”

Another study from the Salk Institute in La Jolla, California has also found that tetrahydrocannabinol and other compounds found in marijuana may reduce the amount of beta amyloid in the brain. Beta amyloid is a hallmark characteristic of Alzheimer’s and is commonly thought to cause the neurodegenerative disease.

 

.....Or granny is milking the situation

 

I certainly hope that you never have to care for a loved one who has dementia. You would make a terrible caregiver.

 

No kidding. Althpugh, I must admit, over time, I start to develop that mindset somewhat. She focuses too much on the fact that she has it, and sometimes even sounds like she's using it as a crutch. Sometimes when she apologizes for her spells, I get very angry and shout at her: "I DON'T WANT YOUR HALF BAKED APOLOGY! I JUST WANT YOU TO STOP BEING A BITCH, AND THEN STOP COMING TO ME AFTERWARD WITH A POOR ME STORY, BADLY DISGUISED AS AN APOLOGY!" Of course that took a few years to develop that kind of reaction. I never thought at the beginning that I could ever be that mean to her.

 

My comment was to VG not to you.

You would be better served asking your questions on the Alzheimer's Association board rather than Hip Forums. At least there you would find people who are caring for loved ones with dementia and nurses who will have suggestions on interacting with your grandmother.

I can say that yelling at her is not good for you or her.

 

I jnow, you were talking to vg, but your comment did get that thought to my mind. And I do know that telling isn't helping anyone, and that alz.org would probably be better. I just forgot about that sure for a while.

 

Based on that one internet comment?

His reaction seems to suggest she was on part playing on it, at the start anyway. Dementia is degenerative, so its no doubt worse now.

What do you think, no one that has any type of malady ever uses their condition to get special treatment?