Girlfriend doesn't come

Women at your age who "can't cum" simply aren't worth the aggravation.

Too many negative possibilities can happen from it.

Move on.

 

Ooh, that sucks. I know because I AM that girl. At first I figured it was because I was uncomfortable, but my boyfriend and I have been together for over a year, I've come in front of him because of masturbation or toys multiple times, but even though what he does feels better than what I can do myself. (He does the g-spot pokes like you described.) I will be like "OH GOD I'M CUMMING...!?!??!? oh wait, never mind, wtf." I'm pretty sure that it's because my body isn't "used to" coming that way, since when I masturbate there's only one specific way that I do it. I should probably switch it up a bit, I suppose...

Obviously, I haven't overcome this problem myself, but my advice to you is to work up to it. Convince her to masturbate on her own, again and again and again, until she orgasms herself. Then after she's practiced that ("do your homework, young lady!") stimulate her until she's revved up and then let her masturbate to orgasm. Learn from what she does, try it again, and get closer and closer to orgasm before she starts doing it herself and see if you can work your way up to it. Make sense? 0_o

 

You sir, should win the Nobel prize for your extraordinary sense of compassion and patience.

 

Just goes to show, some people make love, others simply fuck. Personally, I find lovemaking much more satisfying, but then I don't know if you would understand that. Satisfying someone other than yourself seems beyond your scope of comprehension.

 

I noted to you saying she is holding her breath, and that sounds like a problem right there. She is holding it all in imo - the breath and the orgasm.

Usually when about to orgasm a womans breathing pattern will suddenly and rather notably change to short, shallow and rapid breaths, ..then kapow, it all explodes. She is not allowing herself to let go if she is consciously tensing her body, stopping breathing, etc, etc. So that would be the first thing I would try to work on with her if I was you - getting her to keep breathing, which will keep her body more relaxed and will then allow the orgasm to flow through her.

Another issue is that g spot orgasms can make you feel like your about to pee right before them, and a lot of women tense in response to this and suddenly lose where they were at. If this is an issue for her, tell her to make sure she empties her bladder before sex so she can be mentally comfortable that she is not about to pee even if it feels like it, and then dont try to hold back when she feels that sensation.

I really think it is as simple as that, ...she is just not letting go.

 

Your technique is poor, you appear to me to have little or no idea of how to pleasure a women.

Do what you do to your GF to your-self, and ask yourself honestly does that feel good?

Use your own body as feed-back, grind your own genitals like your GFs, and ask your-self does that feel pleasurable ?

And be totaly honest with your-self.

OK now "caress" your-self really slowly, and gently, forget about forcefully fingering your GF violently - its just absurd doing that.

I remember one women that was so frustrated with her husband, and the way they were kissing, and she really had no idea on how to kiss, she was so rough and careless, its no wonder she couldn't get off.

Sometimes I think people get their sexual education from porn, these people are paid actors,they probably do not enjoy it or the women highly likely never do.

So you have to be gentle and slow. This G spot finger thrusting crap is just silly from what I know about sex.

You know what its like when a women is rough and sloppy on your genitals, its just not a turn on.

So s-l-o-o-w down and be really gentle and caring - if you're capable of that that is ?

Turn the light out, that seems to make a difference natural moonlight is fine.

A lot of caressing with your hands, if they are soft and dry, after awhile if you do it right you'll have sweat over the body to lubricate your hands.

Real orgasm your both saturated in sweat, its like being born again, so your hands and your bodies glide up and down easily against each other.

Its also the way a women perceives you that gets her off.

If you show you her you don't care, NO arousal, its that simple.

Showing her, you love her, genuinly is the most powerful affrodisiac

Dont fuck her.

Make love to her because you want to have her children, and take care of them, for a women that her sole innate reason for life, and they're the reason she's making love to you, its a primal instinct in her genetic code.

Care and love, and proving that you really do love her, tells her inate genetic programming that you are a mate that will hang around and look after those children.

Orgasm is the glue that will bind you to her, both you, and the offspring.

Orgasm is natures way of fast tracking your semen into her egg, its like nature is applauding your efforts for being a great lover and both caring and loving her.

So I believe that real orgasm is vaginal barrel contractions, copious amounts of sweat,to lubricate your bodies so they glide up and down on each other like a well oiled machine.

Its the outside of her body that you must succeed in getting wet, this is the threshold of orgasm and the moment you climb on and prepare for the ride of your life.

At this stage her heart is racing so fast you can hear it in her chest like a tiny drum beating really fast.

What you previously thought was male orgasm, falls away to reveal what real male orgasm is.

Suddenly everything you thought about orgasm is completly wrong, and the reality is both scarey, but incrediblly pleasurable, beyond anything you ever felt was possible.

When you insert your penis and its thrusting in and out, THIS TIME those keegal muscles start to constrict around the shaft of your cock and your mind eyes is both shocked and awed by the intense pleasure that is eventually too much to bear.

Infact the keegal muscle tighten to the point that it causes you to ejactulate like you never have before.

Intead of a lightning bolt shooting up the interior of your shaft its hot sperm shooting into the end of her vagina and the opening of the uterous scooping up the semen like nectar.

Its at that point you black out and some time later you wake like from a dream, feeling so relaxed and drugged, but its natural, no hang over, no sickness, just a strange stillness, quiet and euphoria.

Orgasm is becoming one and the same, like your body and soul has become one and that you and your partner are no longer separate enties.

And this feeling of closeness and love.

Caressing her over a long time proves you care about her needs not just your own.

 

Well as a woman who doesn't really like oral sex (on me anyway...no prob giving it to my man),as well as with a guy who doesn't care for doing that to me either, I'll tell you what I like.

1. As I'm giving him oral I like for him to rub me down there with his hand, sometimes finger, but has to be real gentle with finger or else feels uncomfortable or sometimes feels more like I gotta pee than pleasureable(like someone said that seems to be too sensitive)...which he's gotten better bout gently fingering...It's also good when he pats it....
2. I like to be on top. That seems to be the best position for having an orgasm during intercourse (for a woman of course). I get to ride him while still rubbing my cl*t against his body, and he helps to turn me on by carressing and kissing my breasts and whispering things I'm too shy to repeat. *blushes*
3. When he's on top, I like for him to rub his d*ck against my cl*t before inserting it. I also like it when he takes it out a few times during intercourse to do that some more.
4. It's also nice when he's on top and breaks out a vibrator to place on my cl*t while he goes in and out.
5. When we're in another position, particularly doggie style (but still vaginal...i don't do anal) I like it when he stops for a sec to put his hand thru my legs, from behind, and rubs me from just about my cl*t to almost my butt, up and down. That about gets me screaming.

I may not get oral, which I don't mind, but he sure does his share of trying to get me to orgasm. He likes to make me happy, but I also think he likes how it feels when I orgasm during intercourse. He likes the extra wettness on his d*ck as well as how it feels when the vaginal walls squeeze, contract, and carrass his d*ck.

 

I nutted twice reading this thread...

anyhows Is your GF currently taking any medications??

 

some people have higher emotional intelligence than others...

depends on breed of human, and general intellect.
like empathy n all that as well.

 

I've been married a long time, and my wife has changed over the years. She no longer desires to orgasm during sex. She always did and we had a great sex life. Over the last ten years or so, she has abandoned even trying to orgasm. I blame it on medications she takes, plus problems she has with intimacy and emotions. She had some past experiences (before we met) that makes her avoid both intimacy and emotional outbursts (including having orgasms). She doesn't want foreplay at all. She never masturbates, and hasn't since she was very young. However, she is cool with pleasing me alone, and seems to get a lot of satisfaction from doing so. She loves to make me cum inside her.

I give you some history for the purpose of explaining how this whole situation affects me. I'm a believer in the fact that the guy should help the woman cum first and often. It's almost a sign that we're able to please our woman, and it builds up confidence in us. I've had to change my thinking a lot over the years. For a long time, I felt like a bit of a failure until I understood that it was not my technique, my lack of understanding of her emotional state, or selfishness. It was simply that she cannot physically experience an orgasm. Over the last 5 or 6 years, I can count on one hand how many times she has orgasmed.

I give her a lot of attention, I do a lot of the housework, I bring her flowers, I treat her like a queen. To her, these things are more important than having an orgasm. All women are different, and trying to give her an orgasm will only frustrate you and may anger her. Concentrate on what she really wants, be that intimacy (not necessarily sex), gifts, comfort, security, or any number of things. Meet those needs, and in my opinion, you'll be on your way toward keeping her happy, orgasm or no orgasm.

 

I cannot disagree more CJ. Stop thinking with the wrong head.

 

damn. does she take antidepressants? cause thats seriously bad for womans orgasm.

have u tried any toys or vibrators just for the heck of it?

 

PP,
She def. takes anti-d's, and has for years. As I said, I'm sure her meds play a huge role. I also said that she does not masturbate, and has no desire to do so...a vibrator and toys are out of the question for her.

I'm cool with it, though.

 

What I'd give for just one night alone with GentleBen....

 

That was an interesting read.

 

he he (blushing) thanks !!

 

usually when i find that when it's there and "just goes away" it's because the guy moved just a millimeter to far to the left etc. in other words he stopped doing what he was doing that made her get there, probably b/c she didn't tell you she was getting there in the first place.

 

Hey, I'm new to this site- but decided to log in because this is exactly my problem. I'm 29 and had my first orgasm 2 weeks ago through clit stimulation only not 'sex'. Don't know why as I love having sex, love my BF, love his pleasure and love the intimacy. GentleBen- are you available? I could do with a tutor!

 

GentleBen, will you marry me?