Getting no sex.. my thoughts

Discussion in 'Free Love' started by ILoveAngela, May 15, 2013.

  1. ILoveAngela

    ILoveAngela Banned

    I have sort of come to the conclusion of not bothering trying any more. I'm a virgin at 22 and have decided that for the moment I am going to focus on bettering myself and on the things I can actually achieve, and that the girls will eventually come. At least that way I know I won't be distracted, and I'll have an internal locus of control.

    So if some beautiful girl walks into one of my college lectures, I won't feel insecure all of a sudden, worrying about what/when/how to say something.. I'll be focusing on my study. And if some beautiful girl walks into a cafe I'll only take advantage of her if an opportunity arises. Cold approaching girls and giving them amusement because of them knowing I'm desperate(when acting not), is over!

    Last year I was hopelessly obsessed with this girl I was chasing.. thinking thoughts like; 'oh no, I said the wrong thing today, and how will I know if that isn't the determining factor in her decision to go out with me' or 'oh dear, I missed an opportunity today and this might mean that she might have lost her virginity before I get to see her again'. Thinking like that takes it's tole on you. I would really like having the experience a relationship though.. even if the cons outweigh the pros. Anyway there's always masturbation, which I don't allow myself to do more than 3 times a week for obvious reasons(again keeping control).
     
  2. kokujin

    kokujin Senior Member

    derr derr maybe you need to have a dr. phill moment. :rolleyes:

    or be uber in the moment

    or learn how to be a wizard


    :2thumbsup: Or have boobs and just go out.

    Lies. Be a man. :rolleyes:
     
  3. ILoveAngela

    ILoveAngela Banned

     
  4. Mr.Writer

    Mr.Writer Senior Member

    You do indeed sound very desperate, which is unattractive. As well as clingy. You have to flip the idea around in your head; instead of women being your 'targets' and you keep failing at hitting them and you are the one who chases them, embrace what you have to offer as a person to a potential partner and understand that if someone knew you well they would be the ones chasing you. and if such a scenario seems outlandish to you because you can't think of any reason why someone would chase you, then yes, you have some growing and maturation to do.

    Ps, I was a virgin until age 26. Don't give up, you are in exactly the period of your life when you meet long term/lifetime partners. Do not ignore pretty girls who attract you in class. Just don't be a creep and "chase" them; you are completely right that it only serves as humour for them, so that tells you that chasing girls is not the way to get them.
     

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