Getting my strength, I need advice

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by Cosmic Butterfly, Jul 2, 2006.

  1. So Im leaving a relationship, I have a post in Relationship forums which is kind of quick understanding whats happening to my man and me.

    I have a child with this guy, and since I have been pregnant I have been relying on him to provide for me food, shelter, etc....Now that things are coming to an end, Im going to have be flying on my own. Its kind of scary because its been awhile since these wings have flown...

    Im going to have to get welfare, because I work and my income is pretty damn low. I most likely have to get housing assistance, and child care help as well.

    I dont want to rely on the system, but I really dont have an option as a single mom.

    He will see our daughter a couple days a week, so I was wondering if I should still ask him for some financial help. I will be watching her most of the time and so I want things to be fair.

    Please let me know what you think, or if you have any advice.

  2. mamaboogie

    mamaboogie anarchist

    yes, he is obligated to help you financially take care of the children he helped make. Even if he gets to see them a few times a week, who is going to be buying their food and clothes and school supplies and such? get a lawyer, find out exactly what you are entitled to, and don't let him talk you out of it. I know how hard that is, I let my ex husband have everything he wanted when we got divorced, but you have kids to consider, it's not just about you and him.
  3. solar_eclipse

    solar_eclipse Member

    If you were living in a common-law relationship (here at least, I dunno bout in the states) and you had no co-habitation agreement he's gotta pay child support. At least. He may also have to pay a bit of spousal support. Good luck... I know breakups with kids can be a huge hassle.
  4. Maggie Sugar

    Maggie Sugar Senior Member

    Of course he should help to pay for his child to be raised. The fact that he has the child a few days a week is immaterial. And, if you are in a worse financial situation than him, some Maintainence, until you get on your feet, is warrented.
  5. Aristartle

    Aristartle Snow Falling on Cedars Lifetime Supporter

    Go see a lawyer or ask someone at the welfare office what kind of legal aid will be made available to you. Then let your man know that you have been counseled by a lawyer. He doesn't even have to know what you are discussing, or why you are even there - but I think if he is aware that you are looking into what legal responsibilities your relationship changes may cause now that you are seperated, he may be more willing to come up with a plan and work with you - rather than against you (or maybe I should say without much difficulty?). Best of luck.

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