Funny or embarrassing sex stories.

it's not disrespect. neither is sex. it's sharing the beauty of natural beings with one another.

 

no the beauty of sex is something that is shared between two people who love each other or have an amazing connection. two girls sucking you off is usually a bought service.

 

he pretends that he has finished and he gets all tierd and shit like he cummed

 

Ahaha! Caughtcha BrokenWings!! Bought service!

So that's why they wanted the money at the end?

 

And she doesn't ever wonder why thre isn't semen dripping out of her twat? Or does he wear a condom every time? Shit, if he wears a condom, maybe that is why he can't come.

I just love it when people don't communicate. Makes for a great relationship.

 

so when I lost my virginity, I was having sex with my best friends girlfriend. she called out his name. how fucked up is that.

 

serious! if i was fucking my best friends girl, i'd at least want her to say my name.

jk. thats fucked though. did you seriously lose it to your best friends girl??

 

condom every time...u gotta be safe

 

seriously yes. and when I finished he was the first person I called to brag.....theres more to the story than that but its a much funnier one when I leave out all the details.

 

shit this is a hilarious thread. i wish i had an interesting story to share, but my life isn't all that exciting. maybe in time i will experience something that makes me want to die, and in such a case you'll be the first people i come to. the only thing i can think of that was remotely embarassing was how it was so obvious my ex's landlord could regularly hear us getting it on by how awkward he acted around us. there was this damn vent in her room... i mean i was kind of uneasy about it, but not very. wow that was lame.

 

http://hipforums.com/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=13

 

lol great thread, no real stories of note myself though.

 

Fuck off, bird. This kind of thread was made for RT.

 

Once my boyfriend and I were skipping school and were just about to get it on in a somewhat vacant lot and then a cop pulls up as I am half naked and Ben fully naked. I was so embarassed and scared. Comes to be we were close to a school and they called.

 

hmmm i had sex in a graveyard in the snow in january at night. um, its not really funny or embarrasing but oh well.

 

Cris Cross Says Bump Bump

 

Alcohol Related:
Passed out in mid fuck and was laying on top of the girl (she was like 5 foot) for 2 hours before she gave up and called for help. She tried all sorts of things to wake me up. She had pinched me on the ass several times, clawed my back, bit me, pulled my ears etc. She never went for the nuts though, and I've always apreciated that. Well some girl wandered into the room on accident then got some dude (I think it was my bro) to pull me off her. I woke up on the floor naked and had it explained to me later.

Was laying on my back and totally shit faced (vomited on the floor once while we fucked) and then I just peed everywhere. The bed was soaked, we were drenched, and she kept fuckin. It took her like a minute (no gauge of time... was prolly more like 8 seconds) to relize what had happened.

Non Alcohol Related:
I came to quick with this one girl
I came to quick with this other girl
I cum to quick in general

 

At the University I went to, everyone lived on campus and you had your own study bedroom. Inevitably the bed was against the radiator. Unfortunately their was a communal heating system, with the same pipework running through about 1500 of these rooms. If you were at it, everyone in the University knew it. And the sounds that travelled down the pipework were unbelieveable.

Between 10 and 1 most weekends, when boyfriends\girlfriends came to stay, there was just no point going to bed unless you were going to get physical and join in the communal hump!

Worst of all was when you were pulling an all nighter, (no pun intended) - doing that essay or revision practice for a 9.00 deadline. In the peace and quiet of the early morning, when its all starting to come together in your head, (sorry, nother bad joke), the radiator would start going - and why, oh, why was it always a screamer. I've opened the window before now, looked out over the sleeping campus and shouted "You bastards!".

 

ya want embarrassing? Try a 3way with a couple when your brother passes by while you have a dick in your mouth. Not the way I intended to come out of the closet, but it's funny now.

 

ive got off on pot a few times, never drunk though, never tried though.

ooo nevermind, i remember one time i got really blazed before doin the naughty, and i was just not feeling it, went at it for like 30-40 minutes before she got dry as can be and started makin all these funny suction noises, and i finally gave it up...