fscked up permenantely?

That's ironic because in the movie, he too tries to smoke pot again to see if it will go away, and it just makes it worse..

Good luck to you, maybe try to get on some anti-anxiety meds to help you relax a little, it's worth a shot if it's this much of a distraction...

 

no, I dont think you should smoke again. You didn't handle it well the first time and now you feel like you do, so smoking even more isn't your answer.

you need something to get you stop thinking about this, to get your mind to other places, to ease it. smoking more weed obviously isn't going to help you this time.

 

Go join a sport and don't think about weed for awhile. Come back to it when you don't have school (extended break of summer) and enjoy it worry free.

 

haha It HAS dragged on for years, and has actually gotten worse, over time.

 

Depersonalization has its root in anxiety. It can happen completely organically from other disorders, but once you get in the cycle of depersonalization, anxiety keeps the depersonalization going. EVERYONE depersonalizes, it's a part of life. It only becomes a problem when your mind goes "Oh shit, I feel weird. I feel really fucking weird" and that gets you stuck in a cycle of over analyzing how you are feeling constantly and then it starts everything all over again. There is very very very little research done on depersonalization as a singular disorder, but there are methods to make it better/ disappear completely. Let me know if you want to know more, things will get better, I promise you that.

 

well its been three years.....one has passed since iv accepted it

tho id rather keep it than go back to normal as of now, id like to hear more

 

This morning something strange happened. I woke up and felt absolutely normal, but now I don't anymore. I think i figured out why i had anxiety and for a short while was able to overcome it. The night i smoked I was in a dorm room and someone knocked on the door. I became so scared that I was going to get caught, that I just bolted from the room as soon as the door opened. It was just a random person and not authority figure. I feel like when i remember that fact I feel fine, and start to feel normal, or at least feel like i'm in control. I think it will go away, it just takes time. I probably shouldn't have smoked the first weekend of college. Anyway, i'm still having memory issues, but i think they are getting better as well. I will never smoke or do any sort of drugs again. This past week has been the most difficult of my entire life.

 

I definitely think thats true... Just the fact that not everyone gets it can attest to that...

 

I disagree, I never once felt anxiety about it. Apathy more than anything

 

Just waiting to get some weed to smoke before I watch the movie, damn.

 

Honestly i wouldnt recomend it high.. it kinda peaked me out

 

I actually I LOVED it when I was stoned. And boy was I stoned, that 4 day involuntary break was the longest I have gone without bud in over a year. Anyways though that movie had fantastic acting and an awesome and enticing storyline. I totally forgot I still had homework because it was all that was on my mind.

 

I did my math homework tonight completely blazed... i had no idea what i wrote down

 

Usually I do all my homework blazed because it makes it less boring at least, except for reading AP US History chapters because my comprehension and speed plummet at that point haha.

 

Im usually way more productive when high at work it lets me focus on a simple task for a long time.

 

definately, i work at wendys and that shit is so boring if you arent ripped as hell...

 

i'm starting to feel fine. its not that bad anymore. either i have accepted that there is something wrong with me, or i am actually starting to feel like my old self. i think i have just accepted that there is something wrong with me. at least temporarily. because everyday i feel better and better. i'm starting to get my memory back. anyway, i think i'm done.

 

^i don't think smoking weed a few times changes the person you are.
and if it did, that personality was just under the surface.

you aren't damaged man. just accept that there are negatives and positives. there are things to ponder in life.
just "man up"

that's my 2cents

 

That must have just been some good ass weed :willy_nilly:

 

well i duno....i think at first it gives you two mindframes

one is your automatic self (the way you acted before)....when you do things out of habbit

and then an alternative (after smoking)....to think about it with a greater understanding
.....with your new perspective and a new way to view your self portrait (automatic overrides this generally when your in social situations)

you revel in the light of the new experience you found after youv tried it.....and you think with a much more profound understanding of concept

the old and the new come together....

its called learning......and learning imo is genuine change

i can understand how this can be confusing....so if anyone cares lol