Found girls #in Bf's cell...they have a past...he gave a dumb reason...help!

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by ConfusedLittleOne, Jan 31, 2005.

  1. Ok I made another post talking about my bf and I's relationship...it hasnt been smooth sailing and he has said many things to make me not trust him....yet he expects me to trust him. I was lied to for 7 years and cheated on by my ex so I am really insecure. My bf now mentioned some girl that he kissed b4 me...that it was the best kiss ever...well of course not over mine...so he says. He was showing me something in his cell but accidentally(i believe)...scrolled down through his names and #'s and I saw a girls name...the same girl he had kissed, and a few months of us being together he told me she was IM-ing him asking him out but that she stopped cuz he said he had a girlfriend....so my first thought was...WHY THE F*** IS HER # IN HIS CELL!? I let the anger subside and just asked politley and he said..."oh cuz she needed something for her dads car and I told her I would help her out...that he put it in there cuz she was gonna call him when she needed the part...so why did her number have to programmed into his phone and why does he still have it in there if this was over 4 months ago...he "forgot" to delete it he says....and he always has his phone off around me or doesnt answer it around me.

    Yet.....he is all about honesty and never mentioned this to me...and WE WERE TOGETHER AT THE TIME...!!! Ok i might be overreacting...but its only fair...he is suuuuppper jealous with me....I sorta dont believe him...especially since I heard from his ex he was still seeing her when he was with me and(his ex)...and this girl from his phone and him do have a past.... I even went to school with her and know shes hot and know her ways..(if ya know what I mean...Ok first of all how am I supposed to believe anything this guy says when these words came from his mouth..."If i knew u in high school I would have cheated on you"....or...."If i cheat on you dump me ok?"....wow I must sound really dumb for staying with this guy.....but how am I suppose to know if he is lying or not...he might just be good at it....please help!? Advice?!
     
  2. mystical_shroom

    mystical_shroom acerbic

    Yeah, I wouldnt waste my time with someone like that..
    Why put yourself through that, all the worrying and wondering.. Its not worth it.
    Seems to chaotic and such...
    I would just leave and not waste my time with it at all...
     
  3. ihmurria

    ihmurria fini

    well, the whole talking about how you should dump him if he cheats on you, and talking about other girls is rather ridiculous, and certainly won't help with any insecurities you may have. Have you tried talking to him about that?

    Having a girls number in his cell doesn't sound that odd though. I use my cellphone as a phonebook for people, even if I don't even talk to them anymore - I don't want to lose their numbers just in case, sort of a thing. And deleting numbers that you mean to is one of those silly little insignificant things that people often forget.

    I wouldn't worry about that little incident so much as how the two of you interact in regards to other people, past relationships, and jealousy in general.
     
  4. DancerAnnie

    DancerAnnie Resident Beach Bum

    I'm not the relationship expert by any means, anyone who knows me, knows the kind of relationships I've been in. Saying that, I have a bit of experience in a lot of fields when it comes to relationships.

    It sounds as if you both have problems trusting people. Without trust you have no basis for a relationship. It is NOT healthy to be jealous and if it's THAT big of a problem, you need to get out of this relationship and take care of yourself and your own insecurities. What is behind the jealousy? Why can't you trust? If it's all because of your ex you need to take the time to let go of it. This relationship is doomed if you're having petty arguements about a girl's phone number in his phone. Like a previous poster, I have guy's numbers in there from four or five years back "just in case".

    My honest opinion. Get out of that relationship, and don't think of getting into another one until you've taken care of your own demons.
     

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