Flirting Etiquette There seems to be a lack of defined flirting etiquette, so I came up with the following. I would like comments. Please feel free to disagree. 1. If you have been flirting with someone and you decide they are not right for you, say so. 2. If you have been flirting with someone but decide to become celibate for the time being, say so. 3. If you have been flirting with someone but then you have found someone else, say so. 4. If you have run out of patience with someone , say so . You might teach them a lesson. Just don't leave anyone hanging on a limb. But most of all, don't mess with anyone's heart. 5. Just because someone once showed some interest in you, it does not mean they are still interested in you, even if they are still single. 6. If someone on a dating site offers you the olive branch and you decide they are not right for you, just reply with a No thank-you. You could give one reason, but no need to write an essay. 7. Touching other people is normal human behaviour, but avoid the erogenous zones until you are intimate in the bedroom. If someone reacts negatively to you touching them,then you should ask yourself if should take things any further.Why pursue a relationship with someone where the feeling is not mutual?
#7 is not only etiquette, but approaching the sexual assault law. But about the first few, flirting is playing with the state of "maybe". Saying so takes things out of the maybe realm, ending the flirting.
Politeness is becoming so uncommon that it is often mistaken for flirting. There is nothing wrong with asking, "are you flirting with me?" in order to be certain. Regarding number 7, touching other people is normal human behavior for people who already know each other. If you do not know someone at all, or very little, you shouldn't touch that person at all, without asking first. Note, when you initiate a handshake, you aren't grabbing theirs, but rather extending yours, and it's up to the other person to meet your hand...or not. If you haven't even exchanged names and shaken hands, do not touch any part of the person, unless you are a professional making an arrest or providing emergency medical attention. Children should learn this lesson by age 5: "touching leads to trouble." Touching a stranger without permission may get you stabbed with a fork or kneed in the groin, foreseeably so.
I used to of course wait until their date went to the bathroom. But in those case the lady was always making lots of eye contact, even if she didn’t give a smile. I never hit on ladies on dates unless the aforementioned happened. Anytime I got at least two glances I would leave them alone unless they were just too awesome. In my many years it was always about 50/50 with the awesome ones. With ladies that were curious it was rarely a miss. I had no idea how good I had it even though my friends would always give me grief, especially when I culled most. I was 19 and my older friend back from nam would take me out to ladies nights at a spot where a large group of mostly divorced teachers frequented, probably 30 or more in a smallish bar area. I’m not really sure about any rules, just that you treat women like you would want to be treated.
I have looked in three books on etiquette and there is little coverage on the subject of flirting etiquette. Looking on the internet the Wikipedia page I thought was the most pertinent. Flirting - Wikipedia There are a number of Youtube clips flirting body language.
For me flirting especially with eye contact is just a game for 2 players and nothing too serious . Its a bit like playing Poker without the cards. You know when you have "won" as the other person will look away and look back again and normally with a smile. Everyone around is oblivious to the "game" going on.
It would be a bit inappropriate to touch someone you have just met and started talking to. If it is quite apparent you are on roll with that person and you have been talking for some time then what is wrong with the momentary stare or touch? If they reciprocate then you are heading in the right direction. There different types of dancing, many of which involve body contact. Burlesque dancing does not involve any body contact but is still a matter of sexual display.
For me what happens on a dance floor stays on the dance floor. Many dances like you said involve some sort of body contact even if its just holding hands eg ballroom dancing .A big factor in dancing is confidence . Confidence is itself sexy . Some guys look wooden on the modern dance floor and that's because they don't know how to move their hips . For women this is more natural and that's why they tend to be better dancers.
I have an idea how a woman can deal with unwanted attention. Using the good old fashioned pen and paper (or type on paper) she writes a letter along the following lines: Dear [insert name] , Thank-you for your kind offer of the olive branch, but I have to tell you that I am really not interested in forming a relationship with you. I would not reconsider you if tomorrow you became a multi- millionaire. I wish you all the best in finding the love of your life. Yours sincerely,
I could do with using something like that myself . TBH I don't really mind the attention but its not quite the done thing if your out with your partner.
A few years ago at screen acting classes, a female participant in the class had overt body language that she did not want to flirt with her. I had to act with her, but I had no intention of flirting with her.
