I'm having a first time trip with one of my closest friends soon. He's experienced and I trust any decision he'll make. The problem is, I worry about the decisions I'll make. See, I'm a guy and I may be bi and have a bit of a crush on this guy at the moment. Our sitter is going to be his girlfriend and I'm really worried that because I find myself attracted to him, being around her is going to put me in a bad place, where if I'm ever alone with him it's no big deal. What do you guys think? Will I just be too preoccupied and not even think about it? I've also had some really bad things happen in my childhood and I haven't spoken to one of my parents in 5 years because of it. I don't want those thoughts or anything else just as tragic to creep through. I worry and bottle things up in my head a lot and I'm timid and afraid of what I'll find out inside. I plan on going through with it regardless. I'm open to trying new things. I just wanted to hear from someone else first.
It won't be like alcohol, where you don't controll what you are doing. Plus you sure will be preoccupied with what is happening. And if in worst case scenario something goes wrong, you were high, you can tell you weren't controlling yourself or something, it will convice most people.
I think this screams "No, don't trip." Not only do you already know you have some serious baggage to deal with regarding your parents, and it sounds like it might come pouring out, but the fact that your secret attraction to this guy will likely show is definitely something you need to consider. Um, since when do "control" and "mushrooms" go together? Which in the case of mushrooms, can be a very emotionally and sexually oriented experience. but you just said you don't lose control on mushrooms this excuse won't go so far . . . when we trip its real stuff that comes out. anybody who says 'i was tripping, ignore it, it was bs...' just doesn't want to deal with it. OP, this sounds like bad news man. You need to address these issues with your friend and parents while sober first or just trip on your own first or something.
Sounds like your head is full of bad wiring. Mushrooms have a tendency to dredge up a lot of things deep inside your mind..... Not everytime but they can make you face things you don't like about yourself in deep agonizing detail. Tripping to me is often like a deep emotional scrubbing..... When I come out the other side feeling like I just had a good cry or hours of professional therapy.... I feel fresh and every nerve and emotion is open and raw. They are great.
It is way different from being wasted, when you would do a lot of things you will be ashamed of later. Psychedelics never give me sexually oriented experience. It may be different for him though. Everything is possibile and here I've said about worst case scenario, even if chances aren't high.
