So, I have this secret fetish to be taken advantage of by an older guy. In a way though, of course I'm completely writing the individual guy off as a categorical fetish. The guy himself becomes just a toy. Some would be okay with this, but that's one level. I would like to try having sex with guys of different racial / ethnic groups as I've somehow just never ended up doing this. I realize the possible terrible racism inherent here, as I'm fetishizing entire groups, and making them all a homogenous sexual desire by group. This happens a lot in society ("once you go black...a fiery latino...etc.) but can sexual desires (in all their absurdity) be freed of these correct and moral boundaries as long as no one is hurt? Is someone hurt by the sheer fact of being fetishized? I'm a terrible hypocrite. I was once fetishized heavily for being native american. The guy liked even wanted to dress me up...it was racially insensitive and it did sort of hurt because I was actually looking for some level of relationship. But a part of me did like the morally destitute fetish sex... So..are the blurred lines of sexual depravity okay as long as both parties establish what kind of sex they are looking for? Or should one's racial/age/group fetishizing be grounds to rethink one's own moral fortitude? What thinkest the Hip Forum?
I'm a Jewish redhead who dated a Chinese man somewhat recently. My past lovers are a mixed lot, too. I know from stereotypes. I have heard some stories laced with pain told by people who were dehumanized by the fetishism. Now, there will always be a clumsy moment or two, as we are always learning, but if the descriptor means more than the person, it's gone too far. And if it goes on out in public, of course. And if someone is only after me for the red hair, I turn on one stereotype and rip him/her a new asshole with my temper. Are you attracted to particular individuals? Or is this more theoretical?
I agree there does come a point for people that it's not okay. If you're with an asian because you think asians are attractive, fine. If you're with one because you've always thought it'd be dirty and sexy, that's not so fine by me.
Thank you for the solace. It is more theoretical. I haven't met a guy to play out my own fetish, but have considered it, and in my considering, I think I'm usually picturing initiating sex with someone solely for their age. Thanks! I hope to hear other people's responses. Is it okay to sleep with someone solely for a single characteristic? What are other people's experiences?
I think it depends on what the other person is expecting to get out of it. If it is understood that it is a purely sexual relationship, then I don't really see a problem. If the other person thinks there is a legitimate connection there, then it becomes hurtful and deceitful.
Well,at 21, you can likely find a guy wanting to do the same. That is fair,I say. Are you into ageplay?
