Ever wish you would just drop dead?

Yeah,,I suppose dealing with the core issues is to "ruin a thread".

God save the precious "thread",,

Carry on with the "hip talk".

 

Is he complaining though? Your post seems to be the generic post that pops up in any thread where someone expressed dissatisfaction, without actually considering what is wrong with him. 'Acting' might be an answer when you've got an interest to act upon or enjoy it and it makes you happy - he doesn't. That's the problem. Or so he thinks.

My opinion is this isn't actually a problem at all. In fact it's people like you that create these problems by throwing around these ideas that we all should be 'acting', whatever that means. So the more contemplative types - which are perfectly normal within the spectrum of biological life and not dysfunctional because they are not 'active' - see themselves as problems and something that should be fixed by doing something that they don't really want to do. They then get upset with themselves and become unhappy, simply because they're not what other people want them to be.

 

@Walsh: I totally agree. Whilst I have paid a heavy price for refusing to put on an act, and not being what others wanted me to be, I have no doubts that had I even attempted to put on that act, I would not be alive today. If you have to put on an act to get somewhere in this society, I would say the problems lie with society itself, not the individual who has no desire to do that.

It is the case that depression comes in many forms, and has many different causes and triggers. There is no "one-size-fits-all" cure for depression and feelings of worthlessness and helpnesses. Whilst a certain type of advice might be of use to one person, it could be totally useless and even devestating advice to give to somebody else.

 

How is trudging along at a job you don't like, and trying to become well adjusted to this sick society dealing with the core issues? I mean so many people even the professionals think you can just find happiness within the perimeters of this society...well some of us are fed up with it and don't want any part of it.

I certianly understand having to make money though, hence the reason I'm trying to find some seasonal work at least...I don't have a family to feed and don't plan on it...I mean I can barely take care of myself I have to depend on friends and family letting me stay at their houses and am pretty much broke aside from a bit of money I'm borrowing from my dad so it would not be a good idea for me to have kids to bring into it.

But yeah not everyone finds any true meaning in this society.

 

Well maybe masterbating is the most rewarding thing he has going at the moment.

 

I used to feel that way but not anymore. I love life now!

 

What changed your outlook?

 

You're talkin' out of your hat.

I've been there. I've been suicidal, at least three times in my life, more than that in retrospective. I've been hospitalized with depression 3 times, done damage to myself, etc.

It wasn't "contemplation" that brought me out of it. You've got to fight.

By the way, they design those hospitals to give you just the minimal "comforts", so that you don't plan on returning anytime soon. It really does deter one from having "suicidal thoughts" anymore.

Getting busy, getting the old adrenaline and endorphins to work is the answer. Go out, take a walk, get some exercise,,etc.

Having a pity party is small comfort, if any.

 

You misinterpret the meaning of the word "act", as I have used it. I don't mean to be "phoney", and "put on an act" (though, as I stated, the process of "acting", in a professional or avocational sense can also be therapeutic, as one has the freedom to take on various "roles", some of which may give the actor insight into his own situation). What I wanted to convey is to "take action", not just to sit and wallow in self-pity. Action, work, even taking a walk or getting some exercise, these can pull one out of depression, as these activities release endorphins, which are the body's own chemical answer to depression. Staying solitary and sedentary is just a formula for defeat.

 

I'm not suggesting "fitting in" with "society". I don't fit in well myself, but I've found out how to initiate a dialogue with others, being friendly, etc. I've found out not to depend on other's reaction, or appreciation. It's all in what you can do. Me,,I play music, and it turns people on. I get plenty of appreciation through the music I play. In that way, I'm not dependent on my wife, my kids, etc., for constant appreciation. They have their moods, and they have the freedom to be "in a mood". Everyone does, short of hurting others.

It is impossible to "fit in". We all have peculiarities, and taken to the extreme, none of us could probably live peaceably with one another, past a certain point. "Society" is just us, so if you don't fit in, it's because you haven't claimed your place. To do so takes a responsible outlook, not an irresponsible one, such as suicide. No man is an island. What we do affects others.

 

Masturbating may also be contributing to his lack of energy in facing challenges. It's helpful to have some steam, some motivation. Beating off just makes one want to sleep, and become more depressed.

 

Is there really a link between beating off and depression?

How so?

 

Beating off does nothing except to expend energy, leaving one "satisfied", but spent. It's not a good idea to leave the body and mind defenseless against negative thoughts, by using up all the available energy for a moment of pleasure. The price is too costly.

Save your beating off for times when things are going well. Otherwise, count the cost. It may feel good NOW, but afterward, there's the payback, when you need stamina to reject negative thoughts, but find none.

In addition, masturbating is a very private, internalizing, isolating activity. It's more important to actually make contacts with others, IRL, if one wants to avoid depression.

What I learned in depression-avoidance therapy is to avoid getting too: Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired. H-A-L-T

 

"It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society."

 

Neither is it a measure of wisdom to be poorly adjusted to one's environment. If you live amongst others, you are part of a "community", amongst which there will ALWAYS be "elements of adversity". You learn to live within these accepted parameters, or you leave.

Jesus said,,"They are not of this world, even as I am not of this world." But He still came, to "the world", and lived a heavenly, transcendent life, within the limitations of human form. This didn't cause Him to "compromise with the system", but rather, overcome it.

"Adjustment" and "compromise" aren't always equivalent. You have to be on guard. In it, but not of it.

Not everyone feels compelled to merely "look" counterculture. That's just the outward appearance. Being "counterculture" in truth is an internal motive, not a physical garb.

 

I know, I didn't type the whole quote...but yes that is what I was referencing.

 

I don't want to have anything to do with this society, other then maybe trying to change it but that seems like a futile goal so that leaves not wanting to be part of it. But I can't kill myself because damn those people who give a shit they would be quite upset I imagine.

But the thing is there is no place for me in this society, so I won't find happiness by trying to find my place in it...and I am sure I am not the only one who feels like that. But yeah it's frusterating because even professional help seems designed to try and help you be a 'productive member of society' well I don't see anything productive about this society.

 

Well I get high or drunk when I'm feeling down...some people get that sort of pleasure from masturbation. What are people who are depressed to not to seek any pleasure? Seriously though I find even if I have all those needs taken care of I'm still just as depressed, so you're lucky those things work to keep you from being depressed.

 

H-A-L-T is only a guideline. Just as with any other guideline, if one wishes to fall off the mountain, one will find a way.

I'm not "lucky". I work at it.

I use things, like espresso, food, activity, etc. I don't just sit around bemoaning the fact that something "didn't work". I call people, talk, pray, meditate, smoke weed (I'd get drunk, but have found that alcohol seriously affects my tendency toward acid reflux), masturbate, just like "normal people". However, I have found that masturbating, and then "expecting" to feel better afterward is an illusion. The depressing factors are still there, and now, I'm even more vulnerable, having exhausted my available energy. I usually just masturbate when I need to sleep, and can't. The weed helps a bit too.

Yogis know about the sublimation of one's desires, to attain a higher goal, and a healthier state of mind.

 

I lost two relatives to suicide and it hurts those who are left behind, very painful.
In both cases, the suicidals had untreated biochemical imbalances.

Once that is corrected you still need a purpose in life.
There is no shortage of unmet need in this world, of purposes looking for people to claim them. The problem becomes finding the purpose that best suits your time, talent and interest.

If you have toxic people in your inner circle of family or friends, you must recognize that no matter how surrounded you feel by them, that the world is much, much bigger than their social circle.
Get on a plane and fly somewhere. The big city I live in, my whole world, disappears in a few seconds and I am flying over farms and lakes, mountains and woods. Each town I fly over represents a different life I could live if I stopped and made that place my home.
Would I live in a Cajun swamp catching alligators every day?
Would I drive a truck across the prairies?
Would I grow cactus in the desert and sell them on the Internet?
Maybe sell fish tacos and soda pop from a little shack on the beach?
I ran away from a bad love thinking that I will live alone in the desert.
I had never driven so far from home in all my life. I felt like I was at the edge of the world, or even some strange planet beyond my world.
Then one day I meet a beautiful brown skinned girl who likes camping and hiking just like I do. I had given up on meeting anyone so nice, given up on finding someone who likes what I like to do.

It seems like when I finally gave up on my old dreams that I was free to dream new ones.