Dude, where's my _____ ?

It’s just down the hall past the quiet room with the padded walls

Dude, Where's my garden hose?

 

Where you left it, in the damned garden!

Dude, where's my ice fishing auger?

 

A the bottom of the lake after falling through the ice

Dude, Where's my trekking poles?

 

I threw them in the lake after finding out that's where my ice fishing auger went.

Dude, where's my dinghy?

 

It was confiscated by the DEA when you crossed the Rio Grande with a pound of coke

Dude, Where’s my solid gold watch

 

Your watch is buried with Jimmy Hoffa. I have no clue where Hoffa is buried.

Dude, where's my laser level?

 

It was confiscated by the FAA after you aimed it at a flying aircraft

Dude, Where’s my executive Parker ballpoint pen and pencil set?

 

Still for sale on Amazon. You forgot to actually order it!

Dude, where's my pipe wrench?

 

Told you, your shed was a mess..

Dude wheres my exfoliating eye lash cleaner?

 

You can use my turpentine, that I found when cleaning up my shed, to clean and exfoliate your eye lashes.

Dude, where's my Mark III dive knife?

 

Still in the sharks mouth along with most of your arm


Dude, Where’s my deck of playing cards

 

Behind the back of 'the Joker'

Dude: Where's my Alarm Clock?

 

Strawberry alarm clock will be performing at Whisky a Go Go in West Los Angeles on Saturday July 13, 2019

Dude, where's my bottle of Aquafina?

 

Last seen partially submerged in the hot tub.

Dude, where's my puller set?

 

You threw it out after you finished repairing the dent left by the high-speed Hit and Run.

Dude, Where’s my new jacket?

 

It's getting repaired, cleaned and pressed, for your date ….. at "the Whisky a Go-Go in West Los Angeles on Saturday July 13, 2019"

Dude: Where's my Ironing board?

 

You left it at the beach when you realized it doubles as a surf board

Dude, Where’s my solid gold cufflinks?

 

On your 'better half' charm bracelet

Dude: where my (medicinal) bottle of Whiskey (or Rye)?

 

It was confiscated by the Police at the DUI Checkpoint just prior to your arrest.

Dude, Where’s my wolfsbane?

 

I've got rid of it - we can well do without that kind of thing

Dude: where's my Mop bucket?