Double Standards

Discussion in 'Love and Sex' started by dylanzeppelin, May 18, 2004.

  1. dylanzeppelin

    dylanzeppelin daydream believer

    Has anybody ever noticed that girls always get the bad rep? I know this has probably been said tons of times, but just bother me that girls get the nickname slut for supposingly being easy and yet guys get nothing? I only say this because my ex boyfriend is always saying I'm a slut, that I'm easy pussy and everything like that. It doesn't make sense considering anything sexual that occur between the two of us was because we were in a relationship. Another thing is that I did the friends with benefits one time ago and I was the one that look like the slut and the guy got nothing. I'm now friends with him and he never said anything like that, but why are girls always the one singled out when it comes to name calling.

    When will it come to the time where no name calling is called, at least for the girls. I'm just so sick of always being the one called names, I mean I could understand it more if I slept with every guy I knew, but I don't. I just wish there was something good to come out of the whole double standards but there isn't.
    Craziness..
     
  2. Flowerchild

    Flowerchild Member

    I hate that too!! It's not that anybody calls me a slut, but male sluts are just not seen as such...it pisses me off but I see nothing you can do about it!
     
  3. mystical_shroom

    mystical_shroom acerbic

    i sorta can understand..
    But guys get called all sorts of names also...
    guys are always made out to be assholes and such...
    My guy friends always tell me how women assume all guys are asses and that women rag on them all the time for just being a man...

    So i think it goes both ways
     
  4. HappyHaHaGirl

    HappyHaHaGirl *HipForums Princess*

    I know...like, if two guys are jumping on a trampoline or walking down the street, it's cute and okay. But if girls do it, they're whores. I think it's funny. :)
    I mostly just ignore other girls. And most other people. I'm pretty selective when it comes to paying attention to things.. :)
     
  5. Mintaoism

    Mintaoism Member

    hahaha ah who cares you get tons of sex! the name's a bonus!


    (this was a post from a male human beign)
     
  6. dylanzeppelin

    dylanzeppelin daydream believer

    interesting.. rather intersting points so far
     
  7. lucyinthesky

    lucyinthesky Tie Dyed Soul

    oooh ive definitely been there myself....its just another injustice in this world! :rolleyes:
     
  8. dylanzeppelin

    dylanzeppelin daydream believer

    Thank you!!! You are just so much cooler after writing that ..
     
  9. ZePpeLinA

    ZePpeLinA Jump around!

    Yeah, I hate the double standard that comes with being sexually liberated in this society. It's just stupid.
    But you know what? I've learn that the opinions of close minded people shouldnt affect me at all, cos their opinions are based on ignorance and jelousy, so why should I care, why should you care?;)
    As long as you have sex with guys because you want to, not to be accepted or anything silly, I think you're being clever one, not them.:D
    Oh and tell that ex boyfriend of yours to fuck off and grow up.:mad:
     
  10. Mintaoism

    Mintaoism Member

    whats the problem with you? I'm sorry about your unluck at becoming a girl but I was trying to lighten the tone with some humour...
     
  11. dylanzeppelin

    dylanzeppelin daydream believer

    if you are talking to me, I was being completely serious ..no worries, I agree with you.. I think it's awesome..
     
  12. misc

    misc Member

    Do as you please, and if you are called names... screw them. Seriously, with all the other shit to worry about in the world it's not worth getting worked up over something like this.

    Of course this is from a guy's perspective but god, if i took seriously everything anyone said about me I'd be in pretty bad shape.

    Live you life how you want to live it, not how society or others tell you to live it. Be a hippy. :)

    Edit: Eek, it occured to me that this may come off as me accusing you of being a slut.. I didn't mean that. Heh, I was just trying to state that it doesn't matter what title you have....
     
  13. Diamond Gord

    Diamond Gord Member

    I have thought about this and I have come to the conclusion that it's a power thing within the act of sexual intercourse that causes these attitudes.
    During the act of intercourse, the power ultimately lies with the male, the female assumes a submissive role. This isn't to say that women don't have sexual power but the power for a woman is not the act of having sex but the power to not have sex with a man who wants to.
    With the female being submissive and probably at her most vulnerable during sex, a woman should be fully trusting of her partner and to do so has to know her partner very well. Therefore, when a woman sleeps with a man she barely knows, she is making herself vulnerable to someone who may have little or no regard for her, which in turn shows that she is placing sexual affection before her self esteem. The one night stand generaly being a poor substitute for an intimate, loving relationship.
    I realise this theory may not be politically correct and is based on my experiences and relationships but it's just a thought.
     
  14. Peace

    Peace In complete harmony.

    I think it is because the male is "suppose to be the one trying to have sex"

    and the female is "suppose to be the resister"
     
  15. DarkLunacy

    DarkLunacy Senior Member

    I have to disagree. People were calling me a cheap fuck for a while cause I was kinda on a self-destructive alcohol binge and I fell in love 7-10 times a night. I know chicks who've been with 10+ guys and they're not sluts... Its all bullshit. Labeling and the like.
     
  16. DarkLunacy

    DarkLunacy Senior Member

    I've never seen two guys jumping on a trampolene except in Mexico when everyone was wasted
     
  17. I think your ex is mad because he messed up and can't get sex from you anymore, so he calls you a slut. Its pretty mean for him to say all that, its obvious you are not a slut. I would avoid him if i were you. He just wants more sex and to not have to think of you as a person, so he trys to break down your spirit. I can tell you are a good person, so be strong and don't let jerks put you down. Listen to your heart and do what is good and only good things can happen.

    Love and Positive vibrations
     
  18. dawn_sky

    dawn_sky Senior Member

    First of all, the situation with the ex just makes him sound like he needs to grow up. The people that are worth being friends with will recognize that, while the people who view you as a slut because of his bs are not worth your time anyway.

    As for the double standard, it depends on who you associate with. If you are in high school, or at college living in the dorms, or, goddess forbid, involved in a sorority/frat, then you are going to have to put up with this shit. But once you are on your own, living alone or with roommate(s), it's easier to pick & choose who to spend time with... I haven't really had to deal with that crap in I don't know how long.


    If you really want to get into it, the whole double standard is based on an ideal of female purity, which stems from situations in which an upper class group is trying to maintain control of limited resources. When you have the "haves" and the "have-nots", those who are wealthy must protect the "purity" of their daughter so that some scallywag lower-class man can not claim to be the father of that daughter's illegitimate child. In old Europe (and in India under the caste system), the woman and future children take the father's rank. Therefore, you want your daughter to marry an equal or someone of a higher class. A teenage girl cannot be trusted to make the detailed calculations needed to determine who is the best man to marry, based on class, wealth, and how many other children each family must marry off. A teenage/early 20s boy cannot be trusted with that task either, but since he won't be the one getting pregnant, nothing can be proven unless they are caught in the act, so it's not such a big deal to protect his purity. I'm not sure how much sense this makes, it's too early for me & we discussed this way back at the beginning of this past semester, so it's not entirely fresh in my mind...

    But, what it boils down to is the fact that the double standard is an unfortunate artifact of the attempts of a small upper-class to control the majority of the available wealth & keep it from the much larger lower-class. Not that that really does anything to help in this situation, but...
     
  19. David

    David Member

    I wouldn't worry about it too much, you can't control what others think or say about you, so why worry? Life's too short to concern yourself with negative people.
     
  20. Flowerchild

    Flowerchild Member

    Your Posts are both reasonable, David & dawn_sky. Dawn, what you say is really logically and I start to understand this whole thing and David: yes, you are completely right about what we SHOULD do, but sometimes it's very hard to let those kind of things not influence and worry you!
     

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