Do you turn your head?

Discussion in 'Random Thoughts' started by Personface, May 9, 2004.

  1. Personface

    Personface Tennessee Jed

    I have a question for you guys.

    When you are out somewhere (anywhere, really), and you see someone with special needs (retarded), a midget, someone with a missing limb, or someone really fat, maybe some one of a different you stare at them? Do you turn your head? Or do you look at them just like you look at anyone else? Do you act like they aren't even there and that you didn't see them? Is there only one of those kind of people that you do that to any not any one else? Do you feel uncomfortable? Do you feel like you want to look at them like their normal, but think you will offend them by looking at them?

    This is a question I am asking because last night I went to the carnival, and there was a midget there and I smiled at her, and my friend asked me why I am looking at her. I said that I look at everybody, and if I catch someones eye I am not just gonna turn away. Midget or not. He saw my point and felt bad. But this question is sitting with me now. I want to know what you guys do.

    Be honest please.

    I will be honest that I do turn my head when I see 'retarded' people. It makes me somewhat uncomfortable for some reason. I feel bad for turning my head, but that's what I always do. -I may sound hypocritical about saying when I catch someones eye I smile, but usually I do. This is the case I don't.....

    Let's talk.
  2. Peace

    Peace In complete harmony.

    When your baked, you cant tell whos retarded or just high.
  3. I only turn my head when I look in the mirror.
  4. Personface

    Personface Tennessee Jed

    Wow, how did I know this thread would turn into another fucking joke?!
  5. How long have you been visiting Random Thoughts?

    I rest my case.
  6. BraveSirRubin

    BraveSirRubin Members

    Well, it all depands.

    I take no pleasure at looking at those kinds of people.

    But I do not try to purpously avoid them.

    Staring at them aknowledges your uncomfortableness just like turning your head away.

    I try to just look at them as "normal", but it is not easy... thoughts always come up to my head about thier condition. I do not feel emotinaly attracted to them, but I do feel sorry for them, while also some respect... since they are able to continue living life normaly despite thier disability (well, this does not really apply to "fat" people.. but those i do not see as "different").

    Another race does not bother me at all. ALL of the people in Honduras are of another race than me... I am the one that people look at as a "gringo tourist", and I do feel like a tourist here.

    I love people watching in general, and people with disabilities make it more interesting at times....
  7. Peace

    Peace In complete harmony.

    very well put brave sir robin.

    i did not need to say that but i needed a place to put my 100 post and i want to eat so now i can. HA!
  8. alex714

    alex714 To the Left

    no i used to, when i was little but i'm so used to seeing all diffrent types of ppl that i dont even think of giving them a second glance, if someone is in a really sorry state i dont look at them funny or anything, but they kinda stick in my head in a funny way. i remeber in montreal, i saw this really sad delierous homeless the homeless, i see so many of them that if i did give them change i would be broke. but her face, she was so mad looking, very sad indeed...
    and i defintly dont pretend they arent there, i wouldnt even know how to do that
    and i would prolly do the same as you bc if anyone looks my way, i give a slight smile
  9. boringtree

    boringtree Custom User Title

    nah, they dont bare much on me mind when im near them. i worked for several months volunterily taking care of the disabled so they dont shake me up when im in the presence of them. neither should anybody else, the poor guys can sense discomfort in others, they deal with it all there lives.
  10. Personface

    Personface Tennessee Jed

    Yea, I feel sorry for them too. I am certain they know people are uncomfortable, and that probably makes it hard for them to go out in public a lot of times. I am thankful for not having to feel that way.
  11. didge

    didge Member

    i spent a year of my life in a wheelchair, and i tell ya, it aint nice ta be stared at.
    and ive got alot o cousins who are 'mentally disabled'

    no, i dont stare.
    not sayin i dont look,
    but i dont turn my head ta have a goodlook or nothin...
    tis just human nature i guess, anythin thats different...

    tis terrible
  12. Butterflygal

    Butterflygal Member

    I look at them as I would look at anyone. Having grown up with a mother who takes in children from the Children's Aid, I got used to all kinds of people and they just look normal to me.

    What is normal anyways?
  13. olhippie54

    olhippie54 Touch Of Grey Lifetime Supporter

    I'll smile at anyone if I catch their eyes. I don't feel I go out of my way to look or avoid.
  14. StellaBlue

    StellaBlue Senior Member

    hrm, it depends. If its someone with a mental illness, missing a limb, midget or etc I usually go out of my way to talk to them. I find people who are different very interesting.

    If it's someone of a difference race it depends. If I've seen a person of that race before, then it's just like walking by anyone else, if I haven't I tend to stare and smile, admiring their features. When seeing Japanese women I always stare, they are so freakin' beautiful.

    To be honest I'm a bit scared when I'm around mentally retarded people. It's only because I grew up in a neighborhood where a family kept their mentally retarded son (in his 30's and 40's while I lived there) in their basement. It was so sad because this guy had the IQ of maybe a 3 year old. He drooled constantly and had no bowel or bladder control. He would get out often because he had doors in his basement, when he did if he spotted you he would chase you and try to kiss you. That doesn't sound so bad, but when you take into consideration that he drooled constantly and that was mixed with snuff and food it was horrifying. I was chased many times by him, so I guess I just have a bad example stuck in my head. His parents would have to get in their truck and come chase him down, so freakin' sad. I never understood why they didn't send him to a home with people like him. At least he would've fit in and such. Then again you have to commend a couple of their age for trying to take care of their son.
  15. KozmicBlue

    KozmicBlue Senior Member

    We're all humans. I don't really even think of them as different, as we're all different in some ways. I treat disabled people the same way I treat everybody else.
  16. I don't turn my head, or stare, or act any differently when I see a mentally disabled person than I do any other person.

    And as for race, I don't see race. I just see people. Individuals. :)
  17. HoneySuckleBlue

    HoneySuckleBlue Cosmic Artist

    I try to smile, but some of them looked really pissed off and it intimidates me...I'd hate to have one attack me.
  18. garf12

    garf12 Member

    I usually turn my head but not where they can see or anything. On a side note my baby sitter from when i was about 2 to 9 or whenever i quit having one was a midget.
  19. Mari

    Mari Member

    'Those people' don't want your pity, they would just like to be treated like everyone else and deserve to be.

    I think we all have lessons to learn from 'those people'...they treat everyone the same...and we think they have something wrong with them....
  20. Lilyrayne

    Lilyrayne Chrisppie

    I notice them more than other people, but I never really pay attention to the fact that they aren't "normal". They seem normal to me, I just notice them more because there aren't as many of those kind of people out and about.

    I could be considered one of those people. I'm deaf, and I have a Cochlear Implant. The outside processor and stuff for the implant, if I have my hair pulled back, is really obvious and "weird looking" and I get a lot of stares as though I am one of the people you mentioned. I try to remember that it's just something people don't see very often, so I actually don't mind so much if they stare for a few minutes to get a good imprint in their heads of what it looks like. But they can only stare for so long before it gets to the point of "Ok enough already!" and I wanna just say "Take a picture, it lasts longer"

    I learned tolerance of being stared at a long time ago when I first got my service dog. She's a hearing dog, and she goes everywhere with me. Dogs aren't allowed most places, but services dogs are, and there's not many service dogs around here, so it's odd to see a dog in walmart! The staring thing applies there too.

    It's always perplexed me why people stare at us. You'd think they'd never seen a dog before. Yeah, it's weird to see a dog in a store but come on, why stare? But this is when I go back to trying to remember what it's like when you discover or see something new... you study it and get a picture in your mind. After you've done that, you probably never do it again.

    It's like when little children are learning things for the first time... They see something new and different and they stare and explore it until it's normal to them. Adults aren't really any different. So I try to be tolerant of staring, and I also am not afraid to look a little longer at someone else that is different.

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